I looked at a vine, a similar vine my father used to hang himself, now understanding how he had felt and why he had done it. He felt there was no point in living anymore. All he had was gone and he felt alone.
I too was alone, again. I didn't have Madison anymore. Tears ran down my cheek not wanting to live anymore. Life was too painful, my life was. I couldn't take it anymore. I didn't want to live another day going through another painful moment. I can't bear it anymore.
I reached for the vine from the tree and pulled it to me until I had had enough length.
I cried as I wrapped it around my neck. I began to climb to the top of the tree but the heavy rain caused the trunk of the tree to be slippery. My body would slide down with each attempt I made to climb up the tree. I was not going to give up. I wanted to escape all the pain and hurt and death was my way out.
My claw emerged from beneath the skin of my fingers and they dug into the tree as I made my way up. I stood and looked down arriving at the highest branch of the tree I wanted to hang myself.
My breath shivered as I took a deep breath in. I felt scared of doing it. I was scared it would hurt and it would be more painful than all the horrible things I've been through in my life. I sat down on the limb and sobbed.
I hated that I was weak and a scared wolf. What could put a stop to my miserable life I was too scared to do it.
"I'm not going to be scared anymore," I stood up ready to kill myself.
I closed my eyes and jumped off the tree. I couldn't wait for it to end as I did.
My eyes widened and I felt every breath within me blocked away as the vine tightened around my neck as I now hung from the tree. I fought to remove the vine from my neck. It was painful dying, much more painful than everything I've been through in life. If I'd known I wouldn't have taken this route. My hand went around my neck trying to burst the vine but I couldn't.
I was going to die and I could do nothing about it. I had foolishly taken that choice and I was now trapped by it. There was no way I could escape from it.
The place darkened and I felt my soul emerging from my body.
I heard a sharp sound, was that the sound of death?
It wasn't, it was the vine.
I felt my body falling to the ground and into a warm arm.
"What has happened to you to give up on life?"
I heard a male voice I didn't know inquiring about me. I felt him quickly remove the remainder of the vines from around my neck.
Everything, I wanted to tell him but no words could escape my mouth.
I passed out, not being able to see clearly who he was.
****
My eyes opened and I found myself in a strange area. The roof was unlike Madison's home, it was made of straw.
"You're finally awake, she-wolf," I heard another unfamiliar voice, instead it was a female.
Her back was turned as she spoke. I sat up and I discovered I was naked under a white sheet laying on a bed that felt like it was made from straw as well.
The female turned around and I was able to see her face. She had green eyes and long blonde hair.
"Who are you and where I'm I?" I asked as I stared at her frighteningly.
"I'm Jane and you're on the rogue territory," she replied.
I was shocked at what she had said. I got out of bed quickly, I couldn't stay here. It was not safe dwelling among the rogues. They had too many enemies and trouble was not what I needed. Recollecting what the alpha and his men did to me when they assumed I was a rogue, staying here would be suicidal as well.
I began to leave the small room, building.
"There's a spare clothe behind you if you need them," she told me.
I stopped and went for it. I couldn't shift into my wolf for the blue marks on my wolf would reveal my identity. I went for the clothes, a brown dress, and began to put it on. My back turned as I did. I could feel her watching me from behind.
"So who are you running from?" she asked.
"No, one," I retorted.
I wasn't running from anyone for I had no one.
"Then why did you try to hang yourself?" she again asked.
I spun around to look at her and the awful thought of almost dying scared me.
"I got to go," I told her as I again began to leave.
"If you're trying to escape your pup's father, you can stay here with us, you'll be safe here," she stopped me.
I was stunned by what she had said and I turned to look at her shockingly.
"Wait, you don't know you're pregnant?" she asked reading the extreme expression on my face.
"What!" I asked frightened.
"Just by observing your belly, I can see you're 3 months pregnant."
Both knees felt weak by the news and I couldn't stand still.
Jane ran to me and helped me back to bed.
My mind couldn't process what she had said. I was in too much shock.
"Lay down," she told me.
My eyes never left her as I did while she stood over me.
"How could you not know that you're pregnant?" she asked confused. "Somehow you must have some symptoms that cause you to know."
How could I know, I've been dwelling in the forest for years with my grandmother and she barely taught me anything other than how to hunt.
"I was raped," I told her in tears.
She looked at me sadly. My head turned away from her crying.
I didn't want to be pregnant. I wasn't ready to be a mother when I could barely take care of myself.
Rain poured outside and I heard a wolf running inside the small building.
"She's finally awake," I heard the wolf say.
My tearful eyes turned to him remembering his voice. He was the one who saved me.
"What happened?" his dark eyes that were as dark as the night turned to Jane with concern.
"She was raped and didn't know she was pregnant," Jane told him everything.
His eyes slowly turned to mine and paused while his hair which was the same color as his eyes dripped with water, soaked by the rain.
I cried hard wishing I wasn't pregnant.