Athena
Till we reached close to the mansion, I was a whole different person. It was debate whether I even remembered my own name, however, I did not have to be told twice that I still knew each and every syllable of someone's name and that someone was none other than my mate whose anger hadn't lessened even the slightest bit yet he kept me cradled to his chest like some precious belonging that needed to be protected.
"You are strange," I murmured burying my head into his chest, "You try to act like someone you are not but always end up leaving clues to the one you are in reality, but for some reason, try to enforce others to believe what you pretend to be in real life. Everything about you is so strange, but I still can't stop loving you."
"If you were not this drunk, I'd whip some senses into your head," His voice was not as harsh as it always had been, "You have completely lost your mind."
"No, I haven't," I mustered, "I'm telling you my feelings."
" I don't want to hear about your oh-so-absurd feelings, so how about you keep it to yourself?" His muscles stiffened for some reason as he spoke, since I had my head close to his chest, I could recognize the abrupt rise of his heartbeats.
"But I want to tell you, you'd lose nothing if you hear me once." I looked up at him with hopeful eyes, my lips puckered as my thoughts became a mess all over again when his eyes locked with mine.
"Yes, I'd lose and that is time. Besides, I don't have any time to waste on you," He spat.
Suddenly a shiver ran up and down my body and my teeth clattered, my hands shook and my whole body went cold-- All these were results of the effects of that unknown drug that was really taking a toll on me as this was probably the umpteenth time this sort of strong shiver took over my body.
Sebastian's action was promoted instantly and he rubbed my hands and back, pulling me closer to his warmth to reduce my struggle.
"Fucking bastard," He cursed under his breath as he massaged my hands to keep me warm. Knowing Sebastian, it did not take rocket science to tell that his sentence was directed at Chris.
But from what I understood with my minimal senses, Surely it was Chris who tried to take advantage of my vulnerable state but it was not him who drugged me. It was the waiter who handed me the wine and left it on the table intentionally as if he knew beforehand that I was going to be needing it.
"He's a bastard indeed, but not the one who drugged me was not him," It left my mouth on its own.
"What do you mean?" Sebastian seemed alert once again.
"It was that waiter, he offered me wine and left with the bottle on my table."
"And you fucking gulped down the entire bottle?!" Once again rage managed to struggle its way back within him.
"Not really," A sheepish smile curved on my lips, "Just half of the bottle."
It was more than just evidence that he was enraged, awfully enraged in a way that should have concerned me however, it did the least as it was supposed to.
I was not afraid of him. The only positive thing the alcohol did to me was to make my fears go away. I never felt this brave as today.
Is this way people drink alcohol? To forget their sorrows and feel brave?
"You are a fucking mess to handle," He gushed, infuriated, "I can't even tell you how much I hate you."
And my emotions made a all over again, tears gathered in my eyes and I moved away from his arms, sitting up straight, "It was your fault that I drank alcohol. But did I for once try to blame you for it? No. You decided to take me to a party and dance with some other lady, but the whole time your whole attention was towards her as if it was not me who's mate, it was her. You ignored me as if I meant nothing and now you are trying to make me feel about my actions where everything I did was to simply forget my pain."
His expression was impassive as always but I did not care what he thought or not, I spoke what was there in my heart. I let go of the weight on my chest with my words.
"I drank my pain away, Sebastian. It was suffocating to see you with another woman. You might not have a heart, but I do. If I could forget everything, kill my emotions and bury them somewhere deep, I'd have but I can't think of anyone else other than you! I'm stuck. I have never been loved before but that does not mean that I don't wish to be loved," My voice trembled but I continued anyways, "I want to have my mate by my side, I want his love, not his hatred. But you gave me nothing other than pain in return. You are not willing to understand that I no longer have the strength to keep fighting, I just want your love. Is that too much to ask?"
"I am not here to listen to your rubbish," He spoke, I could notice his attempt to sound strong but his voice trembled just like mine, "Stop talking nonsense."
"You just care for yourself and your wants, perhaps, you'll keep doing that for the rest of your life....but I—" I could not speak, as another strong shiver attacked my body and I had to intake in a deep breath to get a hold myself.
"Fuck this." He groaned under his breath and drew me close once again, finding it the only way to keep me warm.
"No, let me go," I struggled, trying to pry his hands off of me.
"Sit still." It was his plain strict order.
"No, let me go. I don't want to stay with you."
My struggle continued until he cupped my chin and made me look into his eyes which took my breath away, "Just, Stay still." He emphasized, it was neither a command, nor a request— It was something between those two's boundaries and it made me feel some sort of way.
My heart and body both listened to him and I gave up my struggles, leaning into his touch once again and accepting my defeat.
This time in Sebastian's touch there was tenderness, it was not only the warmth of my body that penetrated my skin, but it was also something as well. Something I could perceive but not fully recognize it.
*******
"Can you tell me why you always look so grumpy?" I asked, swaying my legs as he carried me to our room in bridal style.
He remained silent, ignoring me in the most successful way he could.
"Okay forget that question, tell me something else. Do you know how beautiful you are? The first day I saw you, you took my breath away." I traced my finger fingers on his jawline, "You look like an angel."
"But I am not. You know very well that I am contrary to what angels are. A monster to you," He suddenly spat but I did not even flinch.
"You don't get to decide what you are to me," I nuzzled his cheek feeling his body stiffening, "My beliefs are mine, yours are yours."
"I don't give a fuck about your beliefs."
"And I don't give a fuck about yours as well," I said, lightly frowning at his rude statement, "But I do give a fuck about you. Your way of thinking is strange, you are strange, but I still...can't stop giving a fuck about it. What would you do about it?"
He gave me a death glare, as if to tell me to stop but who was going to listen to me? Not me.
"You are a coconut."
"Excuse me?" I could tell he was annoyed beyond extreme and at that moment nothing excited me more than the thought of annoying him furthermore.
"Hard from the outside, but a softie from the inside," I giggled, "You are my cute little coconut.
"Are you going to shut your mouth or do I have to use my ways with you?" His jaw ticked and damn, it looked sexy.
This time the shiver I felt was different, my body was begging for closeness but in a different manner, a contact that'd be skin-to-skin.
I whispered leaning closer to his eyes, "Wreck me."
His gaze snapped at me, flicker passing through his eyes and his blue veins standing drawing attention towards them whilst grip on me tightened.
Well, Of course, he wasn't naive. He knew what I meant and judging by the tightness in his muscles I knew that he would have far fewer objections in fulfilling what I asked for.
A giggle slipped past my lips and I buried my head into the crook of his neck, taking in his scent, "What are you thinking? The night is long enough, we can't let it be all boring, can we?"
I was probably going to regret being this bold, in the morning but for now, I had zero disapproval of my actions.
He drew in a deep breath and tore his gaze away from me and walked us to our room, I silently observed him, trying to read him through his expression. However, I did not succeed.
"First, you'll change and then you'll get your ass on the bed and sleep." He let me on my feet.
I struggled to balance myself and took his help by supporting myself with his hands as I kicked my heels and finally managed to stand up properly.
As I had expected, he planned on pulling away before I could make any move but I was quick to grab his arms and stop him midway.
I sniffed my dress before looking at him once again, "As far as I can see, I don't smell like shit. Then why are hurrying to go away from me?"
At first, it was a look of confusion that covered his facial features but soon it was exchanged with a look of defeat, an internal defeat of a fight.
He blew out a sigh pinching the bridge of my nose, before he grabbed me by my hips, "Look, you are drunk as fauck and need rest. So why don't you just take a good nap and do a favour for yourself?"
"Why don't..." A hiccup interrupted me in the middle of my sentence, "Why don't you just do a favour on me? Just wreck me already. I want to be wrecked."
"Athena...." He was about to start his lecture once again when I moved closer to him causing him to stop.
I wrapped my arms around his neck, standing on my tip toes and leaning closer to his face as I intentionally brushed my lips against his. His hands on my hips fastened their grip, and his breathing stopped.
It was just a whisper from my side, against the soft lips of his and matching the steady of his heart. A silent plea to end the battle of this night and burn in the flames of thriving desires that were begging to be given into, asking us to be lost in them, deeper than the sea and never get back to the shore.
"Undress me, Alpha."