Sebastian
"Show me the CCTV footage of yesterday," I told Pete who immediately ordered one of his guards to bring his laptop.
They worked fast, wary about their movements as I have already let them know that I was more than willing to kill them if they fail to give me the right information. So, it was either do or die for them, although my situation was not so stable as well. The argument with Athena has left me and my beliefs shaken. She fucked me up pretty badly, and my last statement before I exited the room, did the same thing to her in return.
I'd seen it in her eyes— I have broken her.
"Alpha, here's the footage." David opened the video, connecting the laptop to the big monitor for a better view.
"Speed it up." I barked, tapping the ash of the cigar on the ashtray beside me as I fixated my eyes on the screen, to be very specific, my mate.
There was no question that a werewolf's eyes will miss any of the odd changes or even the slightest movements that did not go with the situation, however, I wondered how I'd missed her gloomy eyes and the glistening tears in them when I danced with that unknown, bizarre, woman to get my woman out of my mind.
I had never felt bad about anything I do, the word 'regret' was not in my dictionary but today, I did. And this feeling of regret was fucking painful. I watched as the waiter over to Athena, her eyes the entire time were fixed on the dance floor and it was not unknown what she was watching.
I shouldn't have ignored her, otherwise, that event could have been prevented. I have an equal fault in that situation as much as Athena did. We should have been aware of our surroundings, but none of us paid attention to anything else other than trying to forget our pain and struggle of our own battles.
I could only see the side of the waiter's face, that guy was careful as if he already knew the positions of the camera. However, in the left view, his face could be seen more clearly.
"Show me the list of the works you hired for the party," I told Pete, without bothering to glance at him.
The waiter very cleverly left the tray on the table and walked away. Possibly, out of the venue judging the way, he effortlessly vanished into the crowd. He was smart, and everything he did was perfectly pre-planned but it was not this waiter who was the main individual behind this plan, he only executed it, and the agenda was someone else's.
And the only one who could dare to do such a thing was Vincent Thompson. That motherfucker was behind my mate from day one, and his intentions were very evident. He wanted to kill her.
Even the thought of him getting near her unnerved me. For the first time in my life, I was scared. Yes, I was scared of losing her.
So, the need to finish Vincent soon was now at its extreme. I had to kill that piece of shit before he snatches something from me that I could never get back. I had to end his fucking game before he even carries it out.
As I looked through the list, my dismay came true when I saw that one specific waiter was nowhere on the list.
"That guy isn't on your list, Pete," I spoke through gritted teeth.
"What?" He stuttered, signs of fear showing up on his face, "Alpha, let me check."
He hurriedly went through a few more lists, and the distress in his eyes started becoming more evident little by little as he put each list down.
I knew Pete would never dare to betray me because he despised Vicent equally. Moreover, for a coward like him who feared death more than anything else, it was ridiculous on my behalf to doubt him, the slightest bit, because he'd never attempt to do anything that'd raise questions about his survival, not even in his dreams could he commit something like this.
That meant, he snuck in.
"Alpha, I am so sorry about this entire matter," Pete's voice came out dry, the sweat covering his entire forehead, "I don't know how this happened, I made sure that the security was strict. I have no idea, how this happened."
I let out a sigh, trying to control the rage that crawled up my veins like poisonous spiders.
"Just one question. Answer, just one question," I spoke, "Were you involved in this?"
His eyes widened, the fear of death clouding them, "No, Alpha. I swear on my mother. I did not know anything—"
His voice seized as I stood up.
He looked at me with wariness, careful and alert.
"I appreciate your loyalty, Pete. You have one more thing to do," I spoke, buttoning up my coat, "Check up on your security. Figure out who's the one that allowed that waiter to get in and send me his details."
He visibly relaxed but this time it was hesitation that began swarming up on his expression, "It might take me a while, Alpha. Because the footage of the outside of the venue has been destroyed and it will take a few days to revive it. But I'd try to do it soon as I can."
Well of course, how could I forget that motherfucking Vincent would do everything to prevent me from knowing his location? He knew once I get where he was hiding, I'd drag him to his grave.
"Make it done, soon as possible. I want the footage and details, within a week." I told him.
"Sure, Alpha. It'll be done till then."
"Good," I nodded, "I hope you will be vigilant about this matter."
With that, I walked out of his apartment, without bothering to hear what he has to say.
Vincent Thompson was after Athena and I knew he'd do anything to achieve his motive.
I won't let him, I won't let him snatch my mate away from me....
But wasn't I the one who was pushing her away already? Who was Athena's bigger enemy, Vincent or me? At least he was only determined on killing her and what I was doing was far worse, I was putting her through such situations, torments and pain where even death would seem like a better choice in comparison.
I could not let this curse go, nor could I let go of her.
What am I going to do?
******
The club was empty as I'd instructed Aaron to do so. I was not in the mood to go to my mansion and face Athena, because I simply couldn't answer any of her questions that were more valid than the continuous decisions I was making, with the intention to keep the basis of my beliefs alive.
I needed this curse to survive, didn't I?
Shaking my head, I poured another glass full of liquor and chugged it down.
The burning feeling of the strong bitter taste clawing down my throat, could not even get close to the burn I felt in the middle of my chest.
I just couldn't stop thinking. I couldn't prevent myself from drowning in the mass of the awful memories that I locked and buried deep. But today, they were banging against those restraints and fighting to the surface with every ounce of strength they had.
When I was weak and full of hope, this world only shattered me. Being the way I was, only made me weak and vulnerable in this world but this curse made me strong. I received it the moment when I was on the edge of falling apart. It fall upon me like a blessing and gave me a new way to live where I had no emotions, neither pain nor any false hopes.
But Athena, made me feel alive. And this was not a piece of bloody good news! I did not want to feel alive.
I chugged another glass full of liquor down. The bitter taste did not help in wiping off the bitterness I felt within me.
Athena's beautiful face began flashing in front of my eyes, looking as angelic as she always has been.
She made me want to feel the touch of love. Explore the massive spectrum of emotions and motivations I'd never perceived before and they felt good...those light caresses of these forbidden emotions felt a thousand per cent better than this stone-cold cage I put around my heart, only so that I never turn into the same Sebastian again.
I never got the chance to feel anything else other than pain. The love of my mother was the only time I ever felt the touch of the world that could have been a better place, my father named monster hadn't snatched her away from me.
Anything better than the pain was heaven for me. And this heart of stone I earned from the curse, was truly a blessing for me, but that was then.
However, now, this has begun to seem like a curse like it actually was. Now, as I have started to understand what this curse was preventing me from getting, what I was missing out and what was slipping away from my hands, this curse truly seemed like a curse.
And all of these things I was going through, were something I never felt or saw.
Each wave of something surreal, wanted to pull me into whilst my curse would pull me to the other side, the very familiar side where there remained only darkness.
The peace Athena's touch brought to my soul, the way her beautiful eyes drew me deep in the depth of them, her gentle touch that never failed to trigger my heart to beat faster....all of these felt like a fucking privilege I was not willing to let go at any cost.
I craved to explore the newly found profound sentiments. She was mine. She was destined to be mine, a part of my soul.
But I did not want to get too lost in it.
How could I ever wipe her off of my head when she was there in every beat in my heart, every breath I took? She has captived me in a way none would ever be able to do, she trapped me under her unforgettable dazzling eyes.
I felt guilty to even look at her after everything I put her through. Nothing can justify my actions, I did not deserve her. Despite everything I did, she was still trying to heal me, selfless and willing to forgive my sins that crossed every boundary.
How could someone love a monster like me? How could she still care for a demon who left no chance to make her feel miserable and snatch everything away from her?
She deserved better.
But...I can't let her go.
It was now a choice between her or my curse.
The curse that helped me survive, or the woman who wanted to make me alive once again.
"Alpha, I think you shouldn't drink anymore," Aaron's voice broke through my crowded thoughts, "You have already consumed too much."
"It's not too much, Aaron," I chuckled, bitterly, "I'm fine, don't worry."
Sighing he sat on the stool opposite to mine, "Alpha, I know you might not like me interfering in your personal matters but...." He hesitated for a second but continued anyways, "But I have been noticing it for a while and I think it's the right time to ask you about it— Are you really catching feelings for your mate?"
His questions caught me off guard.
It was as if he took the words from my mind and asked me the same question I had been asking since the start.
Was I catching feelings for Athena?
No, I was incapable of feeling anything. This curse might have fallen weak, but not me. Then how was it even possible that I was catching feelings for her?
I did not love her. I was incapable of loving. My only language was hate, then why is that now, I was the one under this blunder of dilemmas? I was supposed to feel nothing but hatred and inflict only pain.
"Alpha?" He asked after a long moment of silence when he got no answer from me.
"You are the one who knows me for the longest time, Aaron. Do you think I'm capable of feeling any emotions let alone love? Do you think that I can fall ever fall in love when I have not even a trace of emotion alive even in the depth of me?"
This time it was Aaron who fell silent, however, the confusion in his orbs rose even more as if, for him, something did not fit right.
"But I did not ask you if you are in love with her or not." He finally let out.
My body froze, and my grip on the bottle of alcohol tightened until it shattered into pieces.
I felt like someone has poured a bucket of boiling water all over me that wanted to wash away all my decisions with it, forcing me to face the truth I did not want to acknowledge as one.
Yes, he did not ask me if I loved Athena or not. My answer was not directed to him as well.
It was the answer to my own question that disturbed me, unnerved me to the point where I wanted to run far away from her to avoid letting her in any further than she already had.
I had to choose between my curse or her, it was high time. I could not keep fighting like this anymore, this will only drag me into a pitfall of hopelessness.
I grabbed a new bottle, ignoring the few pieces of glass that pierced their way into my skin when the bottle shattered, and I drank straight from the new bottle. The moment the bitter-sweet taste hit my tastebuds, I knew it— This liquor was stronger than the previous one and they were going to be plenty of aftermath of consuming it without any estimation.
"I don't know what is up with you, Alpha," Aaron spoke, "But I hope you will be able to figure out what is more important to you and what is just a burden you are forcing yourself to carry. Some chances only come once in a lifetime and once they are gone, they are gone forever."
And he walked out of the place, leaving me with my loud thoughts roaming around the crowd of this unsteady silence.
I took a few more gulps from the alcohol bottle and then threw it against the glass racks fit against the wall. The loud sound broke through the entire place, leaving the floor shaken for a brief moment before everything seized to a halt.
My curse or my mate, I only had one choice.
I don't know what'd be my ultimate choice but for tonight, it'd be my mate.
My Athena.
Today she is the one I'd choose and perhaps, I'd regret this decision once the sun'd go up but till then this curse would not be my choice. I'd not suppress my emotions, the way I want to treat her, or what I feel like doing every time I see her.
I'd show her the love I feel for her. Not the hate I want to show.
Without thinking twice, I Walked out of the club and headed to my car.
I needed to get to her, as fast as I could.
Tonight she'd get her mate, not her cursed sadistic alpha.