I woke up in a dark room. Was it still night time I wondered as I looked around my surroundings. I got up from the bed and started walking further into the darkness. There was nothing in sight. I started to panic looking around for any signs of life.
“”Why do I always find you lost somewhere?” A figure materializes out of the darkness and I saw it was Isaiah. Light is shining off his body as he walks to me. I was so happy to not be alone I immediately ran to him and gave him a huge hug. It felt great to be able to hold him again.
“I thought I was alone,” I said into his shirt as he rubbed my back.
“You’re never alone. I will always be there for you, Zira.”
My heart swells when he says my name. Usually when he calls me Zira he's mad but the way he said my name was a melody to my ears. Then I heard laughter behind me and another figure walked out of the darkness. It was Alaia. There was no light coming from her so I could barely see her.
“Here you are again taking something that’s not yours, Zira,” she spat as she came closer to Isaiah.
Instinctively I stepped back while she laid a hand on Isaiah’s shoulder. His light dissipated instantly, replacing it with the same dark aura of his mate. Her other hand moves through his hair as she pulls him into a kiss. I stood there unable to move watching them. Before I could say anything Dr. Callie appeared facing a huge projection screen showing an ultrasound of my belly. It looked as if I was already 6 months pregnant and ready to give birth. I looked down horrified at my swollen belly.
“Alpha the baby is progressing wonderfully. However, Zira,” Dr. Callie looks at me with pity in her eyes, “it looks as if your baby is sucking the life right from your body.”
She points a mirror in my direction and what I see is horrible. My skin is rapidly turning gray, my eyes look sunken as if they’re about to fall right into my skull, my hair begins graying and falling out in patches, all the while my belly comes to life. It starts to grow and I see a white light inside.
“Isaiah, I can’t believe you actually had sex with her. Look at her,” Alaia said hastily.
“I told you. I was really drunk. I mean do you really think I would want something like that in my bed?”
The words weren’t real but they still stabbed my heart like little pin needles. I start to scream but nothing comes out. I’m mute.
“I say we get rid of them both. I don't want to deal with a motherless child,” Alaia offered, “Especially if it isn't mine.”
“Good idea, mate. I wouldn’t want to deal with a child crying for its dead mother.”
**violent trigger**
They all surrounded me with knives as I backed away. I tried to run but my strength was failing me. I was becoming weaker by the second. I fell to the ground as they got closer and started to fight them. Then I felt the first sharp cut from the knife into my belly. I screamed and begged for someone to help but no one came.
“Zi, Zi! Wake up!”
I felt someone shaking me as I tried fighting them away, but they were persistent. I tried opening my eyes but the Doctor, Alaia, and Isaiah were still standing over me, stabbing me over and over as the blood fell against my skin.
“You should have tried harder to get rid of this child. Now it will be the death of you,” Alaia said, covered in my blood.
The dream had its claws into me like holdfast clamps. I couldn’t break free. I laid on the dark floor feeling my life fading away as they continued their slaughter on my stomach.
“Zi, you’re fine. I’m here. Listen to my voice. I command you to wake up now.”
I felt the power of that command. I saw a paw reach out and I knew it was Nina. She came to save me.
“I got you Zira,” she said.
I grabbed on and was pulled away from my body. Away from the murderous trio standing over my carcass, away from the dark cold floor filled with my blood, and away from the darkness until light broke through.
**violent trigger ends**
I bolted up feeling arms holding on to me. I started to push them away but they held on fast.
“Hey, hey! Calm down. It’s okay. It was just a dream, Zi.”
Isaiah was holding me tight as I looked around. I was a room, a hospital room. I looked at all the surgical things in the room and instantly started to panic.
“What’s going on? What are you doing to me,” I cried. I couldn't help the tears. I was freaking out and I didn’t want to be here. “Please, Please.”
“Zi, look at me. Look at me.” Isaiah grabbed my face between his hands, trying to get me to look at him. My eyes looked around some more for anything he could use as a knife before settling on his eyes. “Everything’s fine, Zira. Nobody is trying to hurt you. Just breathe with me, ok?”
I looked around some more while nodding my head. I was preparing for something bad to happen. Isaiah guided me through a few deep breaths while tracing circles on the back of my mind. It was working as I felt a bit more calm. Then the door opened and I jumped immediately making Dr. Callie jump as well.
“Zira, oh goddess. Is everything ok,” she asked, looking a bit concerned. After the dream I was a bit skeptical. I didn't want to be a dream within a dream.
“She drifted off when you left to get the pictures of the ultrasound,” Isaiah said, still holding on to my hands. I can’t say I wasn't grateful but now I’m thinking Alaia might bust through the doors next. I slowly started to pull my hands away and he let me.
“Well that’s common during pregnancy, but if it gets to be too much let me know. As for the soreness of your breasts, that is normal during the first trimester, so it should diminish in the next few weeks, ok?” I nodded. “Well here’s the picture you requested. Sorry it took so long. It seems this is the season for pregnant she-wolves.” Dr. Callie laughed which helped lighten the mood in the room.
“Thank you, Dr Callie. For everything.” Isaiah stood up and helped me down from the table. “Please let us know if there’s anything else we could do to make this easy for Zira.”
“Of course, Alpha.” We started to walk out but Dr. Callie stopped us. “Alpha, would you mind if I could have Zira for a minute alone?”
I looked at Isaiah who gave me a questioning look and I nodded. “I’m okay. I can meet you outside.”
I knew what she wanted to talk about and I couldn't have him near. I watched as he walked out the front door of the hospital before turning to look at Dr. Callie. She handed me a pamphlet that said “Your choice” written in huge letters.
“Zira, I really want you to think about this, ok? It’s a big decision and I don't want you to regret this. If you need to talk or have any questions you let me know. This will be between us.” She gave my arm a good squeeze before leaving me staring at the pamphlet. I hurried and tucked it away.
This is shameful, Zira. So selfish Nina growled.
I don't need your disappointment right now Nina. It’s not just about me. It’s about Isaiah and Alaia and our future mate. You said it yourself. We are spoiled. He might even reject us.
I don't care about that anymore. This is a life, Zira. It’s bad enough that our species aren't plentiful and here you are getting rid of your own flesh and blood. What will Isaiah think?
How dare she use the Isaiah card? She barely even likes him I thought.
Nothing, Nina. He will think nothing of it because he’s going to have his own baby with his mate. I want the same I snapped at her.
Then you should have thought about that before having unprotected, drunken sex Nina countered.
I closed my mind off from her. I was so angry at what she said because it was true. I made a mistake and I should take responsibility. She just couldn't see that I was. This was my way of handling it and she's just going to have to get on board.