Christian
I'm pissed, so fucking pissed but I'm pissed at myself more than anything else. I'm confused about what I'm thinking and feeling and it's annoying the hell out of me. When I found out that Molly couldn't be found on the farm I instantly panicked. The girl has almost died twice today and I just wanted her where I could see her, even if I couldn't explain the reason why.
The relief I felt after speaking to her and knowing that she was ok was quickly replaced with another wave of anger when she point-blank refused to tell any of us including Tom where she is. Does she think she can just leave like this? And more importantly, why the fuck do I care about it so much? I've wanted her gone since the first moment I laid eyes on her and now that she's gone I should be jumping for joy but all I feel is anger while something else simmers in the pit of my stomach that I don't want to figure out right now.
Tom storms away from the trees and heads back towards the remains of our house. I follow him while our brothers follow both of us. He stops right next to the remains before slowly stepping over broken glass, wood, and what remains of our possessions.
"What are you doing, Tom?" Jack asks as we all stand around watching Tom as he keeps walking further into the remains while looking down at the ground. "I'm looking for something." His voice is gruff and he still sounds so pissed but I don't know what to say to try and make things any better. I doubt there's anything I could say to make him feel any better or for him to be any less pissed at me and deep down I know that I deserve it. Hell, deep down I'm pissed with myself!
Jack starts to follow him in as he keeps getting further away from us and without thinking I do the same. A noise in the distance stops me in my track just as I'm about to take my first step inside the remains. I look over my shoulder to see my Dad's truck coming towards us but it looks like he's alone. I turn my attention back towards Tom and Jack who has already caught up with him while Callum and Zack go to see our dad.
After a lot of glass dodging and cursing I finally reach Jack and Tom who have stopped right at the back of the ruins. "What's going on?" Tom gives me a shitty look before looking back down at the ground while Jack just frowns. "I'm looking for anything of Molly's that may have survived, mainly her memory box and passport." Wait, why the fuck does he want her passport?
"Her passport?" He turns his attention to me once more. "Yes, Chris, her passport." I wonder if I look as confused as Jack does right now. "But why? Why does she need her passport?"
His pissed look very quickly turns to one of hatred. whether it's at what he's about to say or that he hates me I'm not sure but I pray that it's the former and not the latter. "She needs it to leave. She needs it to head to New York." What the fuck? New York. Nope. Ain't happening!
"Why the fuck would she want to go there?" I struggle to hold back my own anger at the situation even if deep down I know that this is because of me. "Does it matter, Chris? Why do you even care about where she ends up?" His question only irritates me more even if he's right to ask them. "I dont." It's a lie but not one that I'm willing to admit to right now.
"Well, at least you have gotten what you wanted anyway ay Christian." Tom walks past me looking and sounding so fucking sad that it cuts me deep. His anger I could deal with a lot better than his sadness. It always hurts to see him upset but to know that I've caused it hurts way more than it should.
Once his words actually register with me I instantly get angry. "How have I got what I want?" He gives me a condescending look. "You've wanted her gone since day one, Chris, let's not pretend otherwise." He's right I did want her gone but now, well, fuck I don't know much of anything right now.
"Yeah, I did but only because I know she's been hiding something from us, maybe even from you, Tom and I wanted to protect you, my kids, and the rest of our family from someone who could have the potential to hurt us!"
"I know everything about that girl, all of her secrets, hell, I've lived through all of them with her. I'm the one who brought her here to live with us although if I had known how you were gonna treat her then I wouldn't have bothered. I would have moved somewhere else with her for a fresh start." His words stung.
"I wouldn't want you to live anywhere else Tom, we've already spent too much time apart in our lives." His time in the Army meant everything to him and I'm glad that he got the experience but fuck did I miss him. we all did.
"And I couldn't wait to come home, Chris but never did I think that my big brother would treat my best friend this way. She's done fuck all wrong except get hurt over and over again!" His anger rises the more he talks and every word hits my heart like a steel plate.
"This isn't what I wanted to happen Tom. I don't know why it is. I feel like shit for how I've behaved towards her but I can't shake off what I know... that she's hiding something." I wish I could let it go but I can't... I just can't.
"Everyone has secrets, Christian so why can't she? She has a past and of course, she has secrets that you don't know about. It doesn't mean that you have any right to know about them. I know all of her secrets, do you really think I would bring her here if she was a danger to anyone here, especially my nieces and nephew?"
He has a point I know he does and I hate it. "It's not that I haven't already thought that, Tom." His anger seems to simmer down slightly making room for more of a confused look on his face while I catch Jack looking at me with a knowing look. I think Tom maybe has caught on to whatever it is that Jack seems to know while I'm standing here just fucking confused.
"Why didn't I see it before?" Tom looks away from me to Jack giving him a small smile. "You saw it didn't you?" He asks Jack whose smile widens even more. "Yep. From the very first moment." Very first moment what? What are they on about?
"This ain't about you worrying about whether she could be a danger to your children or family Christian. You know that I wouldn't bring her here if that was the case. This is about your feelings and being afraid to be hurt again."
"What are you on about, Tom?" He's lost me here. Before he can say another word screaming brings my attention to my Dad and brothers. My dad is on the phone while both Callum and Zack are trying to get my attention.
"CHRISTIAN!" My dad's voice brings my attention to his face and just his look alone is enough to have my heart rate pick up and has me running to him with all I have. I can hear footsteps behind me and know that Jack and Tom are right behind me as always.
I struggle to catch my breath as I come to a stop in front of him but fight through it "Dad what's wrong." In the few seconds that it takes for me to wait for his answer a thousand different scenarios race around my head.
"It's the girls... Katie and Sophie are missing!" My vision turns black at hearing his words and I swear the world starts spinning. Not my girls... not my girls!