My eyes followed him everywhere now and I knew he noticed and it irritated him but oddly enough, I loved that he was irritated with me.
As weird and stupid as it sounds, I was desperate for any form of attention at all from that man so I grasped whatever he gave me.
I wondered if it was because of things like this boys avoided fucking virgins. It probably wasn’t the same with all the girls. I even thought I would not cling to my first but here I was clinging to every little thing he does.
I hadn’t been able to do anything at all because my mind has been clouded with thoughts of him.
When I opened my eyes, I saw him in places he wasn’t and he was always waiting for me whenever I tried to close my eyes and I was not complaining.
My heart had been breaking as much as my heart had been racing. The girls he brought home these days had increased in number as it had started ever since that night. It was as
though he was trying to wipe the existence of that night.
Though the girls left in the early hours of the morning so they would not be seen, they never got passed me because I could never sleep when he was fucking another woman on the other side of the hall.
A girl whose moans were louder than the bells in my ears and the thoughts in my head. I was always by the window and I watched all of them run out of the house, with their face glowing from being thoroughly fucked.
I hated the hope they carried on their faces, wishing and hoping that there would be a second time but I had yet to see the same girl twice for the past two weeks since this marathon started.
But today seems to be different. He had been in his office since he arrived from the office about three hours ago. He had locked himself in and had not come out. I asked Nathan and he told me there was an important meeting he was having there so he should not be disturbed.
I gave them their space but Nathan had left the office area so I was certain he was done with whatever important stuff it was that was supposed to keep him there so why was he still not coming out?
I ate dinner alone because I was really hungry and my stomach was hurting. His food was getting cold and I was worried. I don’t want to think about why I was worried but he was my husband so it’s normal that I was even if he wouldn’t have cared if we switched situations.
“Hazel. Aren’t you going to sleep?” Lily’s voice brought me out of my thoughts and I turned towards the voice to see her standing by the entrance of the living room.
“Atticus is yet to eat dinner so I am a bit worried. I think I would stay here and wait for him a little more” I told her and my eyes strayed towards the hallway that led to his office and my home studio willing him to walk out.
“You don’t have to stay here and wait. You don’t even know how long he will take before he is done with what he has to do. You have to get used to it. He stays long hours sometimes stuck in his office. I promise he is fine”
Sometimes I forget that Lily has known and worked for Atticus for a long time but I didn’t want to just trust her words and go to sleep. I won’t be able to sleep without seeing his face.
“Just let me wait for some time. If he doesn’t come out by the time I am very sleepy, I’ll go to sleep. You should get some rest too. I know you have been working a lot today” She had done a lot of cleaning and even ran some errands for me. The bags under her eyes were a big tell of how tired she was.
“No. I’ll stay up a little with you. I’ll feel bad if I go to sleep while you are awake” Her eyes were practically closed and she was struggling so hard to keep them open.
“Don’t stress it, Lily. I’ll go up soon okay? Just tell Lorenzo to please put his meal in the microwave for me before he goes to sleep. I’ll take it to him”
She wanted to say something but I shook my head and she signed in defeat before heading to the kitchen to probably deliver my message to Lorenzo.
I rested back against the couch and closed my eyes so I could think about the next thing to do. I sat there for a little while before I was up and moving towards the office before I could think. I marched there with unknown determination sure I was going to be giving him an earful.
I grabbed the handle and pushed the door open ready to begin my endless rant but I was stumped by the rare sight before me. I never imagined that I would be blessed by such a sight.
Atticus was fast asleep on his large mahogany desk. There were a lot of papers littered all over the desk and his computer was on. He must have fallen asleep while he was working. I felt bad for him as I watched him sleep.
He must have been extremely tired for him to have fallen asleep in between his work.
Lowkey, I wanted to fault him and say it was because he had time to sleep around when he was supposed to rest but I couldn’t find it in me to say it out loud.
I walked towards his sleeping form. He was fast asleep and didn’t look like he would be waking up soon. His eyes were shut tight as though he was dreaming. I wonder what kind of dream it was, he seemed too peaceful as he slept.
My hands reached out without a beat and I traced my fingers across his brows to smoothen the frown that had marred his face. He flinched at my touch and I stiffened at the action.
He relaxed again and my body relaxed with him. It would be a disaster that I wanted to avoid at all costs. But my hand didn’t seem to agree with me. He looked so peaceful while he slept. I know he would never allow me to be this close if he was awake.
My hands trailed his features. His eyes, nose and lips. His lips were so soft just like I remembered. Images of what those lips did filled my thoughts and I could not resist leaning down.
My heart hammered so hard against my ribs as I leaned down so close. I slowly knelt down beside him so I was face to-face with his face.
My fingers traced his cheekbones lightly and I took in his face and how fucking handsome he was. Even when he was asleep, he made my knees weak with want and desire.
My lips teased him lightly as I watched to see if he would wake up. My brain was telling me not to do it but I was far too gone to not do it.
I pressed my lips against his and kept still. When he didn’t move, I ventured further. I moved my lips softly against his, swiping my tongue against his lower lip to taste the whisky that was on it.
I was so gone that I forgot that he should not be kissing me back and his tongue should not be exploring my mouth.
A bite to my lips brought me out of my trance and had me stumbling back. I felt my bum in shock at the realization that he was awake.
My eyes met his and my legs became frozen in shock. I was suddenly ashamed as if I had been caught in a scandalous affair.
He sat up straight slowly and used his hand to trace his lips. He had a little smirk on his face as he watched me still on the floor of his office. I scrambled to get up but I couldn’t think of what to say or do.
“Were you assaulting me in my sleep?” There was this teasing tone in his voice as he
watched me
“No. It’s not what you think” Stupid, Hazel that’s what you are. I breasted myself inwardly for giving such a stupid and cliché reply.
“So you just happened to be in my office, kissing me while I slept. I didn’t know that was a normal thing we do” He was mocking me now. He cocked his head to the side, waiting for my answer.
“I…I..”
“You don’t have to explain. It’s okay. I understand you know. I know the effect I have on women” he mocked.
My cheeks flamed up in embarrassment because I didn’t know how to defend myself against him when he was looking like sex on legs.
“Don’t mock me like that. I may have had a moment of weakness but don’t use it to mock me”
“What were you doing in my office, Hazel?” he asked seriously this time. Gone was the teasing smile on his face
“I wanted to call you for dinner. I noticed you weren’t around for dinner so I wanted to check up on you” I watched him to see how he would react “I was worried” I added when he still didn’t say anything.
“Thank you. You can leave now. I appreciate you being worried for me but you don’t have to do that”
I was almost certain I heard a vein pop in my neck by how angry I became instantly at those words. I hate him. I hate his insanely gorgeous face. I hate those lips that made me go crazy. I hate everything about him.
“I hate you and how you make me feel. You don’t have to underplay my efforts like that. Why? You would prefer if Samantha was the one checking on you instead of me?” I know I should have kept her out of it but it was too late now.
His brows went up in surprise at hearing her name and I know he was wondering how she ended up being wound up in the conversation but I didn’t stay behind to listen to what he would have said. Instead, I whirled around and marched out of the room, Irritation and embarrassment hot on my tail.