I was about to get lower than my dignity would allow and it pained me so deeply but I was out of options and there was nothing I could do. I had no other options left.
Last night, I stayed up all night thinking. I looked past my stupid reason for why I had to do what I was about to do. I realized that I wasn’t desperate to save my marriage because of pride like I originally thought but I was desperate to save my father’s dream and legacy.
Atticus has managerial rights over my father’s company and everything he built. If I walked out or if I was shamefully thrown out, I would lose everything.
My father’s company would be gone forever since I had the company only in name and Atticus controlled everything.
I had to get it back. Dad made a terrible mistake. For the first time in a long time, I saw a flaw in what he did, a flaw in the decision he made. I was in deep shit and it was because of dad.
So now I either had to look for a way to get the company back or a way to solidify my claim on my company and the second was the quickest and surest way was something that I never thought I would do.
I considered fighting Atticus for my shares legally but I don’t have the power to fight him in court. He would thrash me way before I even started so now I had to drop my pride to make sure I wasn’t separated from my father’s hard work and sweat.
To even say what my plan was is so embarrassing and humiliating to admit. I was going to get pregnant with his baby.
If I produced an heir for him, I could convince him to transfer those shares to my child, that way they would also be mine.
Even if they weren’t, it was better for the company to belong to my child than to someone who could toss me anytime and with nothing. I would not let him and his mistress take that from me.
I knew he was going to come to me as soon as he arrived from work so I was ready and grateful that I would not need to throw myself at him to get him to touch me at all.
I was in luck with what to wear. When I arrived at my dreadful decision, I gave myself a pat on the back for going underwear shopping so I had a wide selection of attractive and to die for choices.
I picked the red lace pair. Unlike the rest of the collection, the panties were your regular high-quality thong but the bra was pure lace, no pad or anything, just thin lace materials. When I put it on, my nipples were pressing against the materials and it was just there in the open, the pink bud visible and begging to be pinched.
I felt like an expensive whore but that was the goal so I didn’t mind. I allowed my blonde hair to fall to my waist.
It was straightened and silky with all the extra care it had gotten. It was in the perfect state to be combed through with bare hands and not come across any tangles.
I wasn’t putting any makeup on because I didn’t want to stain my sheets and give the housekeepers more chores than they already had, besides I looked better with my bare face not to brag or anything.
I put on a matching robe and sat on my bed waiting for him to come home soon. My heart was beating so hard against my chest, it was almost painful to endure.
“You are doing what you have to. It may not be what you want but it’s what you can do for now. Besides he is your husband, it’s not like you are committing a crime” I tried to assure myself that I was doing the right thing.
“But isn’t it so pathetic that this is all I can manage to do? I should be able to do better. I can do better can’t I?” But it was too late to change my mind. He was already here. His shadow was visible from underneath the door.
Just like always, he didn’t knock but barged into the room like he owned the place which he did. And just like always, my breath got caught in my throat as I drank in all of him.
He always had this look on his face that made me want to submit myself to him when we were like this.
The raw desire in his eyes was what I always looked forward to every time. It made me feel wanted and special, that he wanted me and no one else. I know I was lying to myself but I wanted to allow myself to live in that lie even for a little moment.
He looked surprised to see me in my outfit and I stood up to allow him to have a good look at me. He stood by the door not moving an inch but his eyes trailed my movements as I stood up and slid the robe off my shoulders and allowed it to fall to the ground in a heap around my legs.
My body shivered as his eyes raked me from up to down. Out of instinct, I wanted to cover my body but I didn’t. His gaze felt so visible as if he was touching me. His gazes swept all over me hungrily and I saw him take a breath in.
I could not bear to have him just standing across the room watching me and I didn’t want it to be awkward so I lifted my hands and beckoned to him. He watched me still not moving but his eyes were now on my open palm.
After what felt like minutes, he finally stalked towards me like a predator. I thought he was going to hold the hand I held out but instead, he grabbed me and pulled me to him. I collided against his chest a little hard but I had no time to react as his lips swallowed mine in a ferocious kiss.
His mouth was hot against mine as he took what he wanted from me and my knees became so weak as he explored every corner and inch of my mouth. The kiss was not only hard and demanding but dirty.
My clear head and thoughts were suddenly upside down and all I could think of was of the mouth that had taken over my senses.
His hands gripped my waist and he brought me closer against him, we were practically one. I was sure his fingerprints would be visible on my pale skin tomorrow with how tight he was holding my waist.
I could not stop the moans that escaped my lips even if I tried. They kept coming and coming. He tore his mouth off mine and brought his head back to look at me. His fingers came up to my face and they traced the outline of my swollen lips.
The same hands followed an invisible trail down my chest to my cleavage and I shivered at the light touch that made me tremble. It felt like a feather was being dragged across my skin.
Unexpectedly, he grabbed my breasts in his large palms and squeezed hard. It was supposed to be painful but my body didn’t think so. My body involuntarily arched into his touch wanting more.
He released my left breast and lightly traced it like a piece of art. My nipples were now hard and were straining so hard and painfully against the lace fabric desperate for any form of contact. He noticed but decided to torture me.
He fondled and groped my boobs but he made sure not to touch the part that was the most desperate. My breathing turned heavy and my eyes turned hazy.
When his finger finally ran over them, I moaned in ecstasy and relief and I was far too gone to feel ashamed of myself. I don’t know how or when my bra came off but my lips enclosed over my nipples, I was a goner.
He lifted me and my legs wrapped around his waist instinctively. He carried me over to my bed and dropped me on it, his lips and hands never leaving my breast.
His lips trailed down and his hands slid my panties down my legs. I could feel his breath against my pussy and it made me squirm but he held my thighs tight so I couldn’t move. I didn’t have to wait much longer before I was a screaming mess. That man ate pussy good.
By the time he was done, I was trembling all over. Orgasm had hit me twice even without penetration. I quickly changed the position so he was lying down and I was straddling him. He was surprised at first but laid back down and allowed me to do what I wanted.
I didn’t waste any time in ripping his clothes off and soon I was taking the dick in between his legs in my mouth. The groan that left his lips felt like a reward and I worked hard to bring him as much pleasure as he gave me.
His hands gripped the back of my head and he fucked my throat without mercy. I know there was no escaping the soreness I would get tomorrow.
I felt him tense but he pulled me back and lifted me so I was straddling him. He reached for his jeans and I knew he wanted to pull out a condom so I stopped him.
“Don’t use one tonight. I want to feel you” I whispered against his lips. I kept grinding my pussy against his because I knew he tended to get disoriented when I did that.
“No. it’s dangerous” His voice sounded cold and strong but the little quiver at the end betrayed his emotions.
“At least grant me this. There won’t be any problems. I am your wife. It’s okay”
He hesitated but he finally dropped his trousers and I sighed in relief but that would be later.
Now, I wanted to enjoy this moment as fully as I could, while pretending I was the only one in his life that truly mattered.