(Day 80/122 of the experiment)
All night I dreamed of a training session. I stand alone in an empty hall, telling about my life. And there isn’t a single audience member. Then Sophie walks in and loudly shouts: “What are you, a loser? Thought you caught a star? You are a loser! It’s time to accept it, Cinderella!” At 6:15, I opened my eyes, full of tears. What if, really, no one comes? What if I’m uninteresting to anyone? What then?
I open Instagram with a huge fear that there will be comments like: “such an expensive training from a nobody,” “you’re not Iren Shaslyva, what can you tell us?” “you’re not interesting, stop dreaming!” Six hours under my video gathered 30 comments where women asked for my card number and requested to sign them up for online and offline training. Ten of them were from the big city and another 20 from other cities and even countries.
To understand the exact number of people for the online training and to immediately book a hall, I decided that registration for the live meeting would only be available for one day – this way I would feel calm that too many people won’t gather, and I could search for a hall with a specific number of seats.
My friends congratulated me on my success and such excitement. But I started to worry more and more. When I worked with Iren Shaslyva, I genuinely considered her a charlatan. And now I am selling training for women. But I am a different story, right? I will share real experiences, tell everything without embellishments. I will not lie to the people who believed in me.
Thanks to journaling, I cleared my head and started detailing the shopping list and preparation plan for the training that will take place in just 3 days. So after training, I rushed to beauty salons to sign up for makeup, a hairstyle, and a manicure. After that, I went shopping to find a pretty dress. And the last item for today – choosing small gifts for the participants. I will buy tomorrow, when I will know the exact number of people, and for now, I will just choose what could be bought.
I came home too tired to do anything. So I just turned on a series, warmed up dinner, and relaxed. The next few days promise to be very busy.
“Personal life”
(Day 81/122 of the experiment)
And even though today is already the 81st day of my experiment and the “personal life” block has officially started, I definitely don’t have time for it. Mentally and physically, I am engaged in training 24/7. Today’s plan includes a run and the gym – without physical activity, I would surely lose my mind. Then I’m heading to check out the venues that accommodate up to 30 people. The day after tomorrow will be my first self-development training for women, for which 28 women have signed up (and what’s equally important – have already paid, so they definitely plan to attend). Twenty-eight!
The first venue turned out to be quite nice, but somehow not cozy. Located almost in the center of the big city, in a modern business district. However, all the chairs in the hall are placed so close to each other that the participants will literally be elbowing one another. And if you try to move them apart, then 28 people simply won't fit.
I was upset because I had high hopes for this venue – convenient location, a decent size (as it later turned out – only in the ad; in reality, the hall is rather small).
The second venue proved to be even worse than the first. It took me 45 minutes to get to the business center by minibus. And considering that the weather is currently "delighting" us with heat, I wouldn’t want to be in the girls' shoes. Because when you’re thinking about not sweating and getting home to a cool shower as quickly as possible, all motivation for self-development dissipates.
Upset, I called Lilia. My friend said she would come to the center to check out the last option, and if necessary, look for other alternatives.
An hour after the call, my friend and I were already holding cold lemonade in our hands and walking to the last venue. Located just a seven-minute walk from the central square, it somehow didn’t inspire hope. I thought it was actually an apartment that had been converted into a conference room – I came to this conclusion based on the ad description. But the closer we got, the more hope ignited in my heart that this venue might work for me.
And indeed – the small office building had two floors, and at the entrance, a nice concierge greeted us warmly and even showed us to the right room. When we stepped inside, I immediately realized – this is it! Thanks to clever zoning, the simple huge room was divided into different sectors: a place for outerwear (even though it’s not relevant now, it’s a calm spot to leave bags and purses), a little coffee break island, a spot for the lecturer, a projector with a large screen, and chairs arranged at a reasonable distance from each other. Oh, and a large wall, typically used for photo zones or photo stands. Within 10 minutes, the rental agreement was signed and the keys to the venue were in my hands.
Yesterday, I picked small keychains as gifts. They are made in the shape of red lipsticks. I decided that this is a wonderful souvenir to remember our training by. So, together with Lilia, we went to the store where I had 31 lipsticks packed – for me, for the participants, and for Lilia and Sveta, who support me so much.
In the evening, I was creating the presentation I will be delivering to the audience. To make it appear more interesting, besides facts about my life, I added photos – I chose memories from different periods of life and in various forms. I even attached today’s photo in my new pajamas – so people know I’m an ordinary person who shouldn’t be idealized.