Chapter Twenty-two
“S ALAMAT po, i mpo,” said the deep voice that haunted her sleep for so many nights.
Tumalikod ang matandang babae. Si Renz ay lumakad patungo sa kinauupuan niya. She couldn’t even move. She frantically released her breath when she felt her chest tightened.
She blinked. Expecting the figure in front of her to fade away any moment.
Subalit nanatiling nasa harap niya ito at nakayuko sa kanya. Her heart began to race. And she knew she was shaking. Iniabot ni Renz ang kamay sa kanya. Wala sa loob niyang tinanggap iyon at hinila siya nito patayo.
Sa isang mahabang sandali ay naroon lang sila at nakatitig sa isa’t isa. Hungry eyes struggling to gain the most ground.
Shannon recovered first. “W-why are you here?” she asked. She noticed the stubble growth on his face. He’d lost weight too. The pain in seeing him again cut through her. Tila may butong nagbara sa dibdib niya. “I–I mean, how did you find me here?”
Hindi agad sumagot si Renz, nanatiling nakatitig sa mukha niya na tila hinahanapan ng bahaging nawala o nabago. Bahagyang nagsalubong ang mga kilay nito at tumaas ang isang kamay patungo sa pisngi niya. Pinipilit tanggalin ang puting nakabahid doon subalit hindi nito iyon maalis.
“Paint,” wika nito, a little bit confused. “And there’s paint all over your hair, too.” Itinaas nito ang kamay niyang hawak-hawak pa rin nito. Naroon ang mas maraming bahid ng pintura. Dinama ng mga daliri nito ang palad niya. “Calluses...” He shook his head and asked in a voice filled with anguish. “What have you been doing, Shannon?”
Her mouth quivered in what she thought a smile. “P-pininturahan ko ang bakod sa... sa kubo.” Her eyes hungrily searched his face. Tulad din ng ginagawa nito sa kanya.
“You were painting picket fences?” he said unbelievingly. Then he groaned emotionally and gathered her close against him. Buong pananabik siyang niyakap nang mahigpit na halos magpapugto sa hininga niya.
Shannon closed her eyes. Gusto niyang lunurin ang sarili sa init na nagmumula sa katawan nito. Na ang lahat ay totoo. Na hindi ito bunga ng imahinasyon niya dala ng matinding kalungkutan at pananabik.
And when he claimed her lips, she sobbed. Mabilis na pinakawalan ni Renz ang mga labi niya at nag-angat ng mukha, cupping her face with his hands.
“Oh, g od, don’t cry, darling. Please don’t cry.” His voice filled with agony as he wiped her tears with his fingers.
And Shannon, despite herself was surprised to see that there were mists in his eyes too. Did he miss her too? Just as she missed him?
Umangat ang kamay niya sa mukha nito, touching the growth of stubbles that darkened his face. “How long has it been since you last shaved?” she asked softly, loving him so much with all her heart and soul.
Hinawakan ni Renz ang mga palad niya at haliling hinagkan ang mga iyon. “It doesn’t matter,” he whispered and said in a broken voice. “I’d give half of my life if I am to be spared from the agony of the last two months, Shan.” Then he was kissing her temple... her hair... the tip of her nose. “I will never ever let you go again.”
“Renz...”
“I do love you, Shannon.”
Shannon stiffened. “A-ano ang sinabi mo?” Kumawala mula sa pagkakayakap nito at tumitig dito.
“I love you. I love you so,” pag-ulit ni Renz, pagkatapos ay kumunot ang noo sa biglang pagsiklab ng galit sa mga mata niya.
“You love me? Why? Because I’m—was a virgin?” she asked bitterly. “Dahil mali ang mga assumption mo sa akin?”
He put his finger under her chin and raised her lovely face to him. “One certainly doesn’t love a woman because of her virginity, my beloved,” he said Softly. “Love grows from within one’s heart. And I have loved you even when I believed you to be a vamp and a tramp. My pride kept me from recognizing my own feelings.”
Shannon was speechless. Hindi niya alam kung ano ang itutugon. Sincerity burned in those blue eyes. Hope started to spring from her heart.
He pulled her back in his arms. “I guess I started loving you when I saw you on TV hounded by media. On the surface, I hated you. But deep inside I wanted to protect you from those hounds. Or perhaps it started at the night of Frederick’s party. O di kaya ay nang pinagmamasdan kita habang walang-malay kang nakahiga sa kama sa cabin ko. It doesn’t matter when it happened. What matters is I love you.”
“T-that can’t be true,” she whispered. Happiness leaped in her chest like flames.
“Iyon ang totoo, Shannon,” patuloy nito. “I was a fool to delude myself that if I made you mine, had you once and for all, ang lahat ng nararamdaman ko ay mawawala nang kusa. I was wrong. One night wasn’t enough... I want you in my life. When I came home that night and found you gone, tila may bahagi ng pagkatao ko ang nawala... na kasama mong dinala. That I wouldn’t be a whole person again.”
Inilapat niya ang noo sa dibdib nito at humikbi. “Oh, Renz.”
Dinampian nito ng halik ang ibabaw ng ulo niya. “ i t is true that I love Steffie. And she gave me one hell of a reason to haunt you. Para magkaroon ako ng dahilang pigilin ka sa isla... sa piling ko, thinking I could keep you there forever, And I die a little every time Basil come into the picture.”
“Renz...” Tumingala siya rito. “About Basil—”
“He’s your cousin.”
Bahagyang nanlaki ang mga mata niya. “A-alam mo na? Sinabi niya sa iyo?”
“Nila ng Tiya Guada.” He smiled at her tenderly. “Tiya Guada had known it all along. Matagal na niyang hinihintay na sabihin ni Basil sa kanya ang totoo.”
Relief flooded her that she felt weak. “I don’t want her to hate me because I am my father’s daughter. And I don’t want her to think that Basil betrayed her for having taken me in when I had nowhere to go.”
“She doesn’t hate you” he said reassuringly. “She loves you, Shan. And she told me to find you and bring you back. She’s delighted at the thought of gaining two daughters all at once. You and Steffie.”
Umaliwalas ang mukha niya pagkabanggit kay Steffie. “Are they married yet?”
Umiling si Renz. “Poor Basil,” he said with mild amusement. “Walang gustong may kasalang magaganap hangga’t hindi kita natatagpuan.”
“Oh.” Her eyes searched his face. “Paano mo akong natunton, Renz?” muli niyang inulit ang tanong. “Kahit si Basil ay hindi alam ang lugar na ito.”
Renz sighed. Muling gumuhit sa mga mata ang hirap ng damdaming dinanas nito sa nakalipas na dalawang buwan. “Sheer coincidence, Shannon, I’ve hired private investigators to find you. Nalaman kong hindi ka bumalik sa New York. Noong isang araw ay inutusan ako ng Papa na puntahan sa Lemery si Edgar upang dalhin muli sa Alta Tierra.
“We’ve been breeding Arabian stallions for months now. At dalawa sa mga iyon ay manganganak. Hindi ko gustong sumunod sa utos, wala akong pakialam sa nangyayari sa rancho. Iyon ang dahilan kung bakit napilitang umuwi roon ang Papa dahil nagtuloy sa Amerika si Uncle Alvaro para makipagkita sa grandfather ko. And my father was so angry I know there would be hell to pay if I refused. And I’m glad now I obeyed him.”
“A-ano ang kinalaman sa pagtungo mo sa Lemery? You couldn’t have seen me on the street. Hindi ako nagtutungo roon, Renz.”
“Nakita ko ang painting ng mukha ng anak na babae ni Edgar na nakasabit sa dingding kasama ng iba pang family pictures. There was really nothing out of ordinary. Inaalis ko na ang mga mata ko roon nang masulyapan ko ang pangalan ng gumuhit sa dulong kanan sa ibaba ng canvass cloth. Mae.”
She frowned. “You couldn’t have known it was me!”
“Yes, I couldn’t have known it was you,” sang-ayon nito. “Pero parang binayo ang dibdib ko sa mga sandaling iyon. Something flashed in my mind. Sa parola, nang hapong bumalik ako dala ang mga gamit na ipinahiram ni Naya sa iyo. Nakita ko ang mga sketches na ginawa mo at kinusot pagkatapos. You had it signed ‘Mae.’ At ang mismong mga private investigator ay nagsabing ang buong pangalan mo ay Shannon Mae de Asis.”
“I... I have always wanted to paint,” pabulong niyang sabi. “Shannon will always be the supermodel. But ‘Mae’ would be the painter.”
Huminga ito nang malalim bago nagpatuloy. “Ipinatawag ko ang anak ni Edgar at inusisa ko siya kung sino ang gumawa ng painting niya. She perfectly described you to me in details except that you had short hair.” His fingers got lost in her hair. And his voice turned husky. “You’ll never leave me again, Shannon. Promise me.”
Nagkalambong ang mga mata niya. “I love you, Renz... but I can’t be your distress until such time you get tired of me and—” His fingers stopped her from completing her sentence.
“Sshh, darling. I wanted to do this over candlelight, wine and glasses, and soft music.” Sparks began to flare in his eyes as he took her hand with his. “But I can’t wait any longer after all the hell I’ve been through.” May dinukot ito sa bulsa ng maong. A solitaire. Isinuot iyon sa palasingsingan niya. “That ring made me a day late in coming here. Now, Shannon Mae, will you marry me?”
Kumislap mula sa panghapong araw ang brilyante sa singsing. And Shannon was momentarily speechless. Tumingala siya rito. “You were that sure that I’d say yes?” she mocked.
But the mockery in her voice didn’t offend him. Her eyes expressed all the love she felt for him. He smiled confidently.
“You love me, Shannon. I know you do. You whispered you loved me when you were half-asleep that night after we made love.”
“I–I did?” Her eyes wide.
“You did,” paniniyak nito. “I was awake the whole night, darling, wanting to hear more declarations.”
“In that case, I accept your proposal,” she said, her heart overflowing with happiness. Nang bigla ay parang may humalukay sa sikmura niya. Napahugot siya ng hininga. Then she met his eyes. “Y-yes, I’ll marry you with pleasure, Renz Navarro. For two reasons. One, because I love you so much. Iyon ang dahilan kung bakit ako lumayo. I had to while I can. While I still have respect for myself. I couldn’t fantasize as far as you loving me back.”
“Oh, baby.” He kissed her lips sweetly. “I have a lifetime to prove my love to you.”
Iniwas niya ang mukha. Hindi miminsang humugot ng hininga. Ang dalawang kamay niya ay bumaba sa sikmura niya. Nagpatuloy ang spasms.
“Hmm. And the second reason?”
Kumawala siya mula sa pagkakayakap nito. Inilipat niya sa papalubog na araw ang paningin. Pinuno ng hangin ang dibdib at, “Because... I’m eight weeks pregnant, Renz.”
Narinig niya ang marahas na paghugot nito ng hininga. At nang lumingon siya rito ay nakalatay sa mga mata nito ang galit.
“You—are—pregnant,” he said coldly, dinistansiya ang bawat salita.
Tumango si Shannon. Kinakabahan. Had the knowledge changed his mind to marry her? Didn’t he want children? Ang gayong kaisipan ay lalong nagpadagdag sa biglang pagsama ng pakiramdam niya.
“Great,” wika nito, nagtiim ng mga bagang. Itinaas ang mga kamay sa ere at pagkatapos ay muli ring ibinaba. Frustrated, he made her face him. “At wala kang balak sabihin sa aking taglay mo sa sinapupunan mo ang anak ko?”
She bit her lip. Unsure what to say. Dahil tama ito, hindi niya ipaaalam dito ang kalagayan niya.
“Na kung hindi kita natagpuan ay hindi ko malalamang magkakaanak ako sa iyo?” he asked furiously. Muli ay tumango siya, flinching as he uttered an oath. “You would bear my child alone. g anoon ba ang gusto mong palabasin, Shannon?”
“Hindi ko alam kung ano ang damdamin mo sa akin,” she said defensively. “You hated me since the first time we met... you insulted me...” Her voice trailed off. Pigil ng mga kamay niya ang sikmura. Oh, please, not now.
“So okay I was wrong!” he shouted as anger gave way. “But that did not give you the right to deny me with my own child!”
“It isn’t a child yet!” she shouted back, hating him now every second, gasping at the same time. “And you don’t have to shout. I was confused... I missed you so much and I was so scared...” Bumulalas siya ng iyak sa pagkamangha ni Renz.
Renz was confused at the sudden change of mood. Mabilis siyang niyakap. “I’m sorry, darling,” he said guiltily. “Kaya lang ako nagagalit ay dahil—”
Tinabig niya ang kamay nito at kumawala. Tinutop ang sikmura at yumuko sa buhanginan at nagduduwal. At dahil wala naman siyang kinain kaninang tanghali maliban sa humigop lang siya ng mainit na sabaw ay wala rin siyang inilabas na lalo lamang nagpahirap sa kanya.
Renz was stunned as he watched her. Ginigitian siya ng pawis sa noo at gilid ng mukha. And she was gasping for breath. At nang muling siyang magduduwal ay mabilis itong lumapit at niyakap siya mula sa likod. Inihilig ang ulo niya sa dibdib nito.
“Tell me what to do, Shan,” nag-aalalang sabi nito. Natatarantang pinapahid ng palad nito ang pawis niya sa noo. “Oh, g od, tell me what to do...”
“G-give me your hanky,” aniya. He did. Nagpunas siya ng bibig at mukha at muling inihilig ang ulo sa dibdib nito habang sinisikap niyang ibalik sa normal ang paghinga.
“Is it... always like this?” he asked worriedly, his lips on her hair. Tumango siya. “How often?”
“Mostly in the mornings. O di kaya ay sa hapon at sa hatinggabi...”
“And you went through with it alone for the last two months?” Guilt and remorse laced his voice.
She gave a weak smile. “You’re going to make up for the time you were not by my side, lover boy,” she whispered.
“I promise.” Ang kamay nito ay bumaba sa tiyan niya. Banayad iyong hinaplos-haplos. Sa puso ay naroon ang hindi inaasahang pananabik sa magiging anak nila. Pagkatapos ay iniharap siya. Buong pagmamahal na tinitigan mula ulo hanggang sa may tiyan niya.
Pagkatapos ay tumalungko si Renz sa buhanginan, banayad na hinaplos ang tiyan niya at hinagkan iyon. After a while, tumayo ito. Itinaas ang mukha niya.
“I love you, Shan,” he said emotionally. “Thank you for bearing my son...”
Napaangat ang kilay niya. “How do you know it’s a son?”
Kinabig siya ni Renz. “I just know,” he said grinning from ear to ear. Happiness overflowed in his heart.
WAKAS