Natalie
Noah regards me with his silent, blue eyes. He is still naked, so damn beautiful it pains me to watch him and not have him in the ways my heart craves him.
Simply having sex doesn't mean a person's heart belongs to you, and Noah's eyes tell me he isn't in love like he used to be. Yet there is a curiosity within them that wasn't there before.
Chills run over my body. Noah's intense eyes are on mine as his lips part to make way for his deep voice. "A lot of women have claimed that I'm the father of their children. They googled me, found out that I lost my memories, and tried to take advantage."
My blood freezes over, yet I hold his relentless gaze. I won't back down because I know that Emma is Noah's daughter. I haven't slept with anyone else.
"Emma is yours."
I stop breathing as Noah advances and steps closer to me, cupping my face in his warm hand. His eyes appear as if they want to believe me, but I can tell that he is hesitant.
"If I find out that you're lying..." Noah's voice is relentless, yet there is hope behind it. I can tell that he doesn't wish for me to be lying to him. He wants Emma to be his. "If I find out that you're lying to me, Natalie, your games would officially be over. I wouldn't let you close to me again, and you would lose your job."
I gulp, daring to keep my eyes locked on his. Noah is taller than me, physically stronger, and we aren't lovers. Yet I don't feel threatened by him cupping my cheek and forcing me to face him.
"I'm not lying to you," I tell him, matching his severe tone with one that isn't joking around. "Emma is your daughter, Noah. You and I were in love, and... I'm willing to let you do a paternity test."
Noah's eyes slightly widen, and he withdraws his hand. I immediately mourn his loss, and he seems unwilling to stop touching me. But I understand that he is guarding his heart.
Like he said, I'm not the only one who has claimed him to be the father of my child. It's only natural for there to be hints of distrust in his eyes, even if it physically wounds me.
I love him so much.
"I want to do that test," Noah says. "In the meantime, our relationship of boss and employer will continue like normal. I enjoyed having sex with you, but... I don't want to get hurt."
"Neither do I," I tell him in a sad voice, smiling despite the jarring pain in my heart. It feels like I've been cut wide open with a knife, and now I'm bleeding out on the floor. "But it's a little too late for that, isn't it?"
Noah looks at me, his beautiful eyes holding mine captive and making me feel like there is no one else in the entire world but us.
But I realize we won't ever be what we once were—not without Noah's memories. Noah will never be the man I once loved, and that kind man I got to know won't become Emma's father.
No, something tells me Noah's emotions for me aren't the same. There might be an attraction, but there isn't love. I wonder if there will ever be, or are we not meant to be together?
I don't want to live without Noah, but we have no power over some things, and I can't force Noah to love me.
"Did you love me?" Noah asks. "Before the accident..."
I hand him a weak smile. "I never told you that I love you, but I was falling without realizing it myself. You took me by storm, and I'm afraid of never meeting anyone like you."
Noah stares at me, and I shed a tear. I'm showing myself vulnerable right now, and even though it's scary, I feel like there isn't any other choice.
I don't have any other cards in my hands to play. Even if it hurts me to speak of the past, the truth is needed. I realize I can't go back, but maybe Emma can have a father in her life?
Then this would be worth it.
"Can I see her?" Noah asks. His gaze is filled with pain. There is a waging war within them. "I understand that she is sleeping, but... I just want to see her... Please let me see her..."
A smile forms over my lips. What kind of woman would I be if I denied a father from seeing his daughter? Not a good one.
"Emma is in the other bedroom. Try not to wake her—she is impossible to put back to sleep."
Noah smiles, and it makes my heart squeeze. It seems my feelings for him won't ever change. He still gives me butterflies, even if he doesn't remember our time together.
"Somehow, I think she would fall back asleep if I held her."
"I would have to agree," I laugh a little, remembering how calm Emma had been in Noah's arms at the office. "Emma really likes you."
Noah's face softens. The corner of his lips turns upwards, showing me a glimpse of his teeth. "I will be quiet as if not to wake the princess. Thank you very much."
I shrug. "It's not the end of the world if you wake Emma."
"But I would feel absolutely terrible for doing it."
Noah picks up his clothes. It saddens me to see him put them on because it means he won't stay the night.
"True," I grimace. "In the beginning, I always felt like a monster when Emma cried, but I've gotten over it. I've more or less accepted that she likes to be treated like a spoiled princess."
Noah chuckles. "Does she take that from you?"
"God, I hope not," I tell him, smiling. "Or what do I know? A little luxury isn't wrong now and then."
"What do you consider luxury?"
I breathe a laugh. "You're filled with questions tonight, aren't you?"
"Can you blame me? I hardly remember anything from my life, and most days, I just feel empty."
I study his features, feeling the sadness wrapping around him. There was a particular light in Noah's eyes in the past, but it's been blown out. Left is despair—how didn't I notice that before?
"Is there anything in particular that makes you feel empty?"
Noah chuckles, but the sound is sad. "Many things. My mother told me I was trying to become a professional football player. NFL was a possibility before my injury, and thinking about that makes me mad. I might have all the money in the world, but I lack dreams."
I swallow uncomfortably. "That's sad."
"Yes, but that's not the main reason I'm sad," Noah's eyes meet mine, and he attempts a smile. It comes out hesitant. "Every day when I wake up, it feels like I'm missing a person from my life. After our talk, I'm beginning to wonder if there are two."