Samantha
My mind was still reeling later that night as I drove over to Jason’s house. Henry was sitting in the backseat, distracted by his stuffed dinosaur I’d let him bring along, and so there was nothing to occupy my thoughts except for Ryan.
I needed to get him out of my head. It was a dangerous place for him to be.
“Mama? When we get to Uncle Jason’s, can I play with Rolo?”
I looked up into the review mirror so I could see Henry. He was gazing at me with his big, blue eyes, which were so identical to Ryan’s that it made my chest ache.
“If Uncle Jason says it’s okay,” I told him, my words squeaking a bit.
Henry’s face lit up with an excited grin.
Rolo was Jason’s bulldog, and Henry considered him his very best friend. The two were very cute together, but even the prospect of an adorable boy and puppy dog playdate couldn’t ease my anxiety.
By the time we reached Jason’s house, I was trembling.
I managed to get out of the car and unhook Henry from his booster seat. He ran ahead of me to the front door and pushed onto his tiptoes so he could ring it.
It opened a few moments later, and Mandy poked her head out and smiled at us.
“Hey, guys!” she greeted. “Right on time! Come on in.”
“Hi Mandy!” Henry exclaimed. “Can I play with Rolo?”
Mandy chuckled. “Of course you can.”
She stood aside, and Henry zoomed into the house. She watched him go with a laugh and turned to me. She gave me a grateful smile.
“Thank you so much for coming to help,” she said. “I’m not going to lie, I’m freaking out a bit.”
“Don’t worry,” I assured with a grin. “We’ve got this. Everything’s going to work out.”
“You’re right, you’re right.” She nodded, though she was clearly trying to convince herself and not me. “Come on in! Everything’s in the dining room.”
She turned and led me inside. We weaved our way through the house to the dining room.
I made sure to check on Henry, who had found Rolo and was playing with the slobbering dog in the living room. I grinned as we passed them, not even bothered by the fact that my son was going to get covered in dog drool and would need a bath later.
We entered the dining room, and I paused, momentarily taken aback by the piles of stuff taking over the large table. There were tiny gift boxes, ribbons, candy-covered nuts, chocolates, and other little odds and ends to make up the party favors for the wedding. I stared at the organized chaos with a dropped jaw.
“Is it too much?” Mandy asked, her tone tinged with worry.
Slamming my mouth shut, I turned to her with what I hoped was an enthusiastic smile.
“Of course not! It’ll be great. We’d better get to work, though. It looks like it might take a little while.”
She nodded. “You’re right. I’m sorry none of the other bridesmaids could make it tonight.”
“No need to be sorry,” I assured her. “We’ve got this. Tell me what your game plan is for all this stuff, and we’ll get going.”
Mandy hurriedly went about telling me how each box was supposed to be put together, what all went in them, and how the ribbons were to be tied on top.
I paid close attention to her instructions because I didn’t want to screw up and cause her anymore stress.
Once we got started and she continued chatting about all the details of the wedding that needed to be completed at that point, I zoned out a bit.
It wasn’t that Mandy was boring or that I didn’t enjoy her company, but I knew this was the type of conversation where I just needed to sit back and listen, nothing more.
She needed to vent and talk through everything on her mind. I was just a sounding board, really, but that was okay. It was what she needed at that moment.
“…and then, of course, there’s Ryan.” She sighed after some time. “I don’t know what happened, but Jason seems to be really mad at him right now.”
I jolted out of my daze at the mention of Ryan, instantly on alert.
“Oh?” I murmured. “Is that so? You don’t know why Jason might be upset?”
Mandy shrugged. “Not a clue, and he won’t talk about it. I haven’t wanted to pry because it’s really none of my business, except for the fact that Ryan’s supposed to be the best man. I’m holding out hope they figure it out in time for the wedding, though. Otherwise, Henry might get promoted from ringbearer.”
She said the last part like a joke, but I could hear the strain underlying her tone. This thing with Ryan was freaking her out, but she was doing her best to hold it together. I felt a little bad because I knew it was partially my fault that Jason was angry with Ryan, but I didn’t know if there was anything I can do to actually fix it.
“I’m sure they’ll figure it out, though,” Mandy rambled on. “They’re best friends. I bet they figure it out in the end. They have to.”
I give her a reassuring smile. “I’m sure they will. They were always getting into little arguments when they were kids, and they always worked through them. They’ll be able to get through whatever it is bothering them now.”
That did seem to bring Mandy some relief. She released a long breath and her shoulders visibly relaxed.
She sighed with obvious relief. “Thanks, Sam. I’m so glad I have you in my corner with me.”
I was glad I helped her feel better, but I couldn’t help feel a bit of anxiety in the pit of my stomach. I hated the idea of Ryan and Jason being at odds with each other, and I felt so guilty that it was because of me.
“I just wish Jason would tell me what Ryan did,” Mandy murmured. “I can’t imagine him doing anything really bad. Every time we’ve met up with him in the city, he’s always seemed so serious and stern. It’s really intimidating, to be honest. But he also seemed like he was honest and straightforward, so I don’t know that he would lie to Jason about anything.”
Her description surprised me.
That was not the Ryan I knew growing up. He was always warm and friendly. A bit of a troublemaker, like Jason, but he had a big heart and a wicked sense of humor.
Though, I suppose he hadn’t been warm and friendly to everyone back then.
There’d been times I could remember him being cold and standoffish when we’d been around others…it’d always struck me as strange, because he’d seemed so much like his father in those moments.
Despite my best efforts to push him from my mind, though, memories from the night before popped up in my head, specifically the moment when we’d almost kissed.
I’d seen the intent in his gaze as he’d looked down at me, and there was a split second when I’d been tempted.
I hated admitting it, but there was a small part of me that was still attracted to him, that still thought he was the most handsome man I’d ever seen, that remembered what it had been like to have his hands on my bare skin.
A shiver ran down my spine. I needed to stop that. I needed to not think about his touch, or his kiss, and remember that he was a bad man who would only break my heart again.
Mandy opened her mouth, apparently readying to say more, but we suddenly heard the front door open.
“Hello, hello!” Jason called out. “Anybody home?”
“We’re in the dining room, hon!” Mandy replied.
“Uncle Jason!” Henry squealed. I heard his little feet pound across the floor as he made his way to the front of the house. “I taught Rolo a trick! You want to see?”
“You did?” Jason exclaimed in exaggerated awe. “Of course I want to see it! Let me just go say hi to Mandy and your mom first, all right?”
“Okay!” Henry said.
I grinned. There was so much joy in that kid, I wasn’t sure how his little body could contain it. What if Ryan came in and stole that joy from him? What if he broke Henry’s heart like he’d broken mine?
I couldn’t let that happen. I had to protect my little boy, no matter what.
Jason rounded the corner of the open doorway and came to a stop just inside the room. He let out an impressed whistle as he scanned the table, which was full of perfectly prepared favors.
“Wow.” He grinned, his smile filled with pride. “You ladies have been busy. The table is almost useable again!”
Mandy rolled her eyes as she crossed the room to him. “You stop that now. These favors are important, and thanks to Sam, they’re perfect.”
“You’re the one with the vision,” I told her. “I’m just an extra pair of hands.”
Mandy and Jason shared a sweet kiss and a hello.
“How was your day?” she asked, turning back to join me at the table again.
Jason shrugged. “Quiet. Had a few case files to go over, but nothing too serious.”
“Uncle Jason!” Henry shouted from the next room over. “Come see Rolo’s trick!”
Jason grinned and winked at me. “Uncle-duty calls.”
He strolled back out of the dining room to find Henry, and a few moments later, I heard him applauding and praising Henry as my son laughed in delight.
For some reason, at that tender moment, I thought of Ryan.
What would he be like with Henry?
He’d always been the boy’s father, but I’d never really thought of him as a dad. Would he be strict and stoic, like the man Mandy had described, or would he be warm and funny, like the one I remembered?
Gulping, I shook my head, hoping that would dislodge the treacherous thoughts from my head.
“I’m going to order some pizzas,” Mandy said, yanking me out of my thoughts. “You and Henry are staying for dinner, right?”
It took me a moment to comprehend what she was asking, but after a few seconds, I nodded.
“Uh. yeah! We’re staying. Thanks.”
She smiled and nodded. “Great! I’ll go find my phone and call the order in. Be right back.”
I watched her go, and when I was alone in the dining room, I let out a deep breath.
I needed to pull it together, and I needed to stop thinking about Ryan.
I didn’t want to give him that power over me or my mind.
As I stood there, I grew determined not to think of him and to put all my focus on Henry and the wedding over the next few days.
After that, I didn’t know what I’d do, but I’d cross that bridge when I got there.