I was outraged by the fact that Anya's grandfather could do such a thing. Anya continued, "They were very poor, but Mama worked hard to bring in money, which was never enough. Her father was a drunk who used every penny Mama made and even demanded more."
As Anya spoke, I felt myself becoming more and more enraged with each passing second. "Mama was very young and hardworking. She kept trying to make more money. Then, one day, she came back to the house, and her father told her that she was finally valuable to him. He had sold her."
"That's a very inhumane thing to do," I said, my voice gruff with anger. Unbidden, thoughts of Vixenda's father, who was also a drunk and always disapproved of my relationship with his daughter, flooded my mind. I quickly pushed the thoughts aside.
"It was," Anya agreed, staring ahead. "Mama was in love with a man then. She had to leave him, and she tried to run away, but she was caught by the men Cedom sent for her. They took her to the whorehouse."
Anya looked at me with her wise, young eyes, "I feel very lucky, you know."
I was taken aback by her statement. "Why?" I asked, not understanding how Anya could feel lucky after such a harrowing childhood.
"Because none of those men Mama knew was my father. Mama was pregnant with me when she started working at Cedom. She told me. At least, I know that I'm a product of love between Mama and the man she used to love."
Despite the tragic circumstances of her birth, Anya found a way to see the silver lining. "So, do you know anything about your father? Has he visited your mother during the years?" I asked, curious.
"No," Anya shook her head sadly. "Mama said they didn't part on good terms, and the man is probably very angry at her.
She said she wouldn't blame him at all if he was."
She stared at me with a lovely smile on her face, "Mama said he's the most caring man she has ever met in her whole life. When she talks of him, she speaks as if the sun rises and sets on the man's head. She really loved him a lot." She turned away then, "She said that if she makes enough money and we get out of Cedom, she would look for my father and try to explain. Try to make amends."
Tears welled up in Anya's eyes. "Unfortunately, now she's dead. The man would never know whatever she wanted to explain.....and I would never know my father."
I don't know why the girl's words tightens my chest to painful degrees and refused to let go. A heart I was sure died a long time ago.
I don't know why I feel pain in that heart for a stranger.
.
.
.
0. BABY'S PAINED CRIES....
JASAMINA
Hours later, The incessant cries of my baby were getting to me. My heart sank every time I heard his wails. I knew I had to find a place where I could feed him comfortably, but my legs were already weary from all the walks we had taken that day. Despite my exhaustion, I forced a smile and pretended that everything was fine. I couldn't be ungrateful. Tanner had done so much for me already, and I didn't want to burden him with my worries.
I looked at him, and my heart ached at the sight of his tired face. He had been my rock since we arrived in Texas, and I knew I could always count on him. He caught my gaze and gave me a reassuring smile, but I could see the worry in his eyes. He knew how hard it was for me to find a job in this new city, and he was doing everything he could to help.
"Don't worry," I blurted, trying to sound more confident than I felt. "We will be fine before the day ends." I adjusted my baby's carrier, careful not to wake him up. I didn't want him to see how stressed I was.
Tanner nodded, and I could see a flicker of hope in his eyes. "I just remembered a bookshop that I passed by during my little tourist adventure," he said suddenly. "It's not too far from the mall. I can't be sure, but I think I saw a vacancy sign there."
I felt a glimmer of hope too. Another chance to make things right. "Let's go check it out," I said eagerly.
We quickly hailed a cab and gave the driver the directions to the bookshop. As we rode in silence, Tanner turned to me and said, "A bookshop will be good for you. It has fewer customers and more privacy too. The pay is very good. You'll be safe there." He stretched the last sentence, watching my face for reactions.
I felt a knot in my stomach. The last time I worked in a bookshop, things didn't end well. I tried to push the memory away, but it lingered at the back of my mind like a dark cloud. If I wanted to provide for my family, I had to put my past behind me and rid myself of all fear. I would do whatever it takes to provide for my baby, even if it meant putting on a disguise to hide from my past.