知らぬが仏
shiranu ga hotoke
“Not knowing is Buddha” or “ignorance is bliss”
~Japanese proverb
Horus
I’ve been alive a very long time; add on the fact that I skipped ahead a few thousand years, and I still haven’t seen anything like this. She has a strange feeling about her, but I know she’s completely human. If she were not, I’d be able to tell right away.
I would be able to smell her essence, and while she smelled different at first, I’ve almost gotten used to it, and it’s definitely human.
She has nothing but normal blood running through her veins, and while my powers are limited since I left my timeline and am now in modern times. It means that I’m basically half a god—at first, it was almost embarrassing that I couldn’t rise the sun or set the moon, but then I realized that in this timeline, it’s someone else’s job.
I clearly went into retirement the minute I left Egypt with my brother Timber, also known as Anubis. It’s still strange calling him by a different name from the one I’d called him for thousands of years.
But it’s growing on me.
Also, it does help that our friend Alex, another immortal who happens to be a male siren, often yells out “Timber” at the most random times, usually during Timber’s favorite shows, just to piss him off. He’s hilariously silent during commercials though.
Last night Alex started singing a song by some musician with funny hair. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Timber’s eyes glow so gold in my entire life.
Hilarious.
I think this is the perfect timeline for him. Even if he did have to suffer for thousands of years to find his mate again, at least he’s happy, at least he knows he was a demon by choice in order to claim a soul and find his again.
I shake my head and lean against the bar top. It’s already last call. I can’t say I hate this job; I just hate the boredom.
I want to yell at the stupid humans. Tell them who I am. That they used to worship me with awe and bring me gifts out of thankfulness that the sky still existed.
Now, I have beer stains on my shirt and just had to help clean up puke from table number nine after a girl witnessed her fiancé cheating on her when she came home early from a work trip.
I almost slip on barbecue sauce from wings that fell on the floor, but I catch my balance and look heavenward.
Is this really my life right now?
Humility. Such a thrilling experience.
I toss the bar rag onto the table and watch Kit run around and attempt to clean up all the rest of the tables in a frenzy. It’s late, but I’m not tired. Gods don’t really get tired; we rest out of habit. But here, I’ve noticed I rest a lot more. I used to be able to go days without closing my eyes, but now that I’m thousands of years in the future, taking a nap actually sounds tempting, and Mason, my other werewolf friend, said something about binge-watching Hallmark movies, whatever the hell that is, but apparently wine and socks are involved.
Truly, I question if humans have evolved or devolved. Still thinking about it.
Tarek comes up behind me. “She’s pretty.” He grabs the dirty rag I just threw. “I mean, if you’re into mortals.”
I roll my eyes. Last month he said I was going to find my mate and said to be ready. I distinctly remember flipping him off in my head, my first modern reaction in this timeline. “It’s not that mortals aren’t attractive. They’re just stupid.” I look around the club. “Should we lock up?”
“Teach her how.” He points to where she was just cleaning, but she’s suddenly gone. Huh! “And I’ll see you upstairs?”
“Got it.” I go into my office, grab the keys from the hook, and pause… Something’s wrong.
I don’t know what though.
Everything looks the same.
A whimper sounds from the direction of my desk.
The lights are on, but they start to flicker. I walk around to my desk and find Kit sitting underneath it, hugging her knees. “Don’t fall asleep, dreams are dreams, life is life, sleep is death, awake, awake, always awake.”
I would call her crazy, except her eyes are glowing yellow.
I lean down and snap my fingers in front of her.
A hand jerks out and grips my throat. She tilts her head, her smile sad. “For a god, you’re really dumb.”
“What are you?” I snap.
“Lost.” Her lower lip trembles. “I just want to go home.”
I sigh heavily. “Where do you live?”
She points to the sky with a trembling finger as a tear runs down her cheek. “Up. I need to go up!”
“Upstairs?” Did she rent the room?
She shakes her head, and her teeth start to chatter. “Don’t let me fall asleep. I can’t fall asleep right now.”
I frown. “What happens when you do?”
Her eyes are still bright yellow. I don’t understand because I know she’s a human, and there isn’t any glamour or spell on her at all. I would know, I would sense it, I could pull it from her, test it, taste it even.
Nothing about her ramblings or yellow eyes make sense.
Kit shakes her head over and over again. “Die. I’ll die.”
“You’ll die if you sleep?” I clarify.
She nods her head furiously.
And I suddenly realize it’s going to be a very long night for me; good thing I was just internally boasting about not needing a ton of sleep.
“Get up.” I hold out my hand. She takes it. Her hands are pale and freezing. I pull her to her feet. Her eyes go back to their natural color as she slumps against me.
She’s dead weight.
I slap her face lightly. “Stay awake, then.”
She nods, but she’s barely walking.
To save time, I pick her up and carry her back into the bar.
“Whoa.” Tarek passes me on his way upstairs. “She passed out because you smiled at her or what?”
“Yes. This is the result of me smiling.” I grit my teeth. “She says she’ll die if she falls asleep.”
“She on drugs?”
“My exact first question when she fainted in front of me a few hours ago.”
Tarek leans forward, his eyes fade to black, and he sniffs her hair and then down her body. I feel weirdly possessive of the tiny human as he continues to sniff up and down her.
He jerks away. “Huh, I’m not smelling anything immortal.”
“Her eyes glow yellow,” I add.
He tilts his head. “And we’re sure about the drugs?”
“I think we’d smell them on her, but I can always drug test her.”
“Death by sleep.” He nods his head slowly. “That’s new.”
“I know”
“Mmm.” She moans in my arms. “I’m sorry, I just need to get home.”
“Do you know where home is?” I ask.
She nods, then stumbles. “Could you maybe help me get there?”
It’s like she’s drunk, but not. I don’t understand it, and I suddenly think we really should do a test on her to make sure she’s okay or maybe just hospitalize her.
Tarek puts a hand on my shoulder. “I’ve got her address. She lives around the corner, above the deli. Just make sure she gets home safe, and we’ll talk about this later.”
I nod. “Right.”
He eyes her up and down, then stares at me. “Interesting, isn’t it?”
“What?” I frown.
“A beautiful woman can’t even keep her eyes open in front of a god.” He laughs. “I can’t wait to tell everyone.”
“Not a word.”
“Word.”
“Very funny.”
“Have a nice walk. I’ll text you her apartment number. Make sure she has her purse and keys so you can let her in.”
“I’m not an idiot.” I would have totally forgotten to do all of those things; it’s just not normal for me to think about purses or keys or jackets, or anything that people bring with them. Why so many things? Add the whole umbrella thing since it rains or mists in the Seattle mornings, and you need a camel to pack all your things on your way to work if you don’t have a car.
Tarek says nothing, but his smirk says more than words would as he waves me off and starts going upstairs.
Apparently, I need to lock up and also take the new recruit home.
I’m about ready to ask where her purse is when a tap hits my shoulder; Tarek holds out her purse and coat, salutes me, then goes back in the direction of the apartment.
Groaning, I grab her things and slowly walk her out of the bar, careful to lock up when I leave. Not that anything would really happen since Tarek would attack anyone who dared to come in after hours.
He may be sarcastic as hell and slightly annoying, but he’s still a werewolf prince, powerful, and creepy with all of his predictions.
I shudder.
I hate the cold, but more than that, I hate that I actually feel cold. I’ve never experienced sensations of cold or hot before now, and it’s even more apparent with the wet cold.
My phone goes off.
The text reads: “A1.”
Kit is slumped against me while I walk her toward the corner deli; it’s open twenty-four seven. The bright blue open sign flickers on and off like it’s choosing different letters to use to light up each time between the letters.
She starts to snore in my arms.
I lightly tap her cheek; she startles awake and looks up at me. “Am I home yet?”
“Close.” I have the sudden urge to pat down her hair and make her feel better, but it feels like weakness on my part for someone I don’t even know who has already been this difficult so soon into knowing her.
The door to get into the stairs for the apartment is open already, meaning she has zero security. I bypass it and help her walk up the stairs. It smells like mold and dirt, the top stair is broken, and there are only two apartments. Hers is on the left, and it looks like someone tried to break through the wooden door.
This is where she lives? I immediately want to sit outside and make sure that she’s okay, even if I am annoyed.
This is stupidity at its finest, living in a place without actual locks. I go to her door and actually push it open.
She has nothing.
Not even a bedroom.
Just a couch, one blanket, one pillow, and a small kitchen that looks like it doesn’t even work.
“Thanks,” she mumbles, then stumbles toward the couch and lies down. From underneath the cushion, she pulls out a random energy drink and starts chugging it. That can’t be good for her. “Just gotta stay awake another three hours.”
Three hours?
I sigh and walk over to her. “How are you going to stay awake?”
Her answer: “Red Bull.”
I sit down on the couch. “Okay, so then what happens after the Red Bull?”
“I can finally rest.” She still hasn’t opened her eyes. “For at least the hours following before it repeats.”
“Why?”
“You don’t want to know.”
“Try me.” I’m irritated as it is, but none of this is making sense.
“I’m a monster,” are her last words before she drinks two more Red Bulls, then turns on the TV and starts watching a show called Friends. I stay until her three hours are up, and when I get up to leave, she’s already lying there, sleeping like the dead. What a weird little human.
I go to the door and look over my shoulder, the sun is pressing through the window in such a way that it makes her body glow, and toward her beautiful legs, I swear I see a white tail.
I frown.
The vision is gone in a blink.
But I could have sworn, just for a minute there, the human… was a fox.