Chloe
Mama had always told me that waiting was the most important thing. Not necessarily for marriage, but for the right person, for the point when I knew I was ready. I thought I was ready, I thought that Alex was the right one.
I stared down at my knees as I sat on the edge of the bathtub and ran my hands back and forth over them, pulling the hem of Alex’s t-shirt to cover more of legs. I wanted to call my mom, I wanted to tell Alex that maybe I wasn’t okay after all, and I really wanted to talk to Jazmin about how she was right. Very right. I shouldn’t have let him be my first, it had too many complications. But it felt embarrassing to come clean about my lie after this long, and it wasn’t like I could call her right that minute anyway, she ran off to meet a new sugar daddy and wouldn’t be available for days now.
Sniffling, I wiped my face again and took a deep breath.
Everything Alex did felt good – everything we did. But that didn’t change the way the guilt sat heavy on my chest, smothering me in a hotel bathroom only forty feet from him.
A decade of lectures about waiting for the one, about how sacred it was to save for your future husband, and I had just thrown it all away. For what?
I didn’t know.
Maybe it was just because I liked him.
Or because I knew he wouldn’t keep paying me if I didn’t have sex with him.
All I knew for certain was that I was glad it was him, but I hated myself for doing it.
There were lots of girls my age that didn’t think twice about it, ones that didn’t even believe in virginity or the “specialness” of the first time. Most of them weren’t sent to strict orthodox private schools, they didn’t understand what it was like to go against a lifetime worth of teachings.
Mama said I was more American than anything, a result of growing up primarily in the States, and I agreed with a lot of those sentiments of sexuality. I didn’t think masturbation was inherently wrong, or premarital sex, but I still had the guilt. I still had this fear that I would be some sort of downfall for my entire family by having sex. As if I wasn’t born only six months after my parents got married. Maybe there was a reason mama didn’t put much emphasis on waiting until marriage.
And then there was the bullying.
In my freshman year I’d kissed a junior who I didn’t know was in a relationship. He told everyone and within a week I had my locker vandalized twice, notes threatening to beat me up, and a million rumours about me sleeping around with other upperclassmen. None of it was true, but it didn’t stop anyone from repeating what they heard. If only those people could know that I was prostitution-adjacent now, that would be juicier than any fake story about a hand-job. That would be proving them right though.
I closed my eyes and tipped my head back, swallowing the fresh wave of grief in my chest for what people would say.
A knock on the door startled me and I clutched my hand to my chest in surprise. “Chloe?” Alex called. “Are you alright?”
I don’t know. “Just cleaning up,” I answered shakily. “I’ll be out in a sec.”
“Okay.”
I listened for the sound of his footsteps heading toward the bed before getting up and taking the pill that stared at me from the counter. I should have been better prepared for this, I should have already been on the pill and my only reason for not being on it was fearing that it would make this all too real. Well, it was certainly real as I stared down at the little white pills.
I hoped it was Dr. Neilson that mama made the appointment with instead of Dr. White like she said, I didn’t want to tell an old man about taking Plan B.
I waited another full minute after taking the pill and brushing my teeth before coming out of the bathroom. The room was dark, save for the muted light from the city below us washing over the floor. Alex was sitting on the edge of the bed checking something on his phone, he glanced up at me and smiled, setting the device aside.
“Everything alright?” he asked when I took the spot next to him.
I nodded and forced myself to smile back at him. “Yeah, of course.”
His hand came up and touched my cheek, the only warning I had before he kissed me. His touch made my worries melt away like they were nothing, dissolving into a flurry of butterflies that filled my stomach. I reached for him suddenly, wrapping my arms around his neck and pushing myself into his lap. He slid his hands up under the t-shirt I wore just to paw at my tits, stroking his thumbs lazily over my nipples under they were hard against his palms.
“If you keep this up, we’ll never leave the hotel room,” he mumbled against my lips. “I might not let you leave again.”
I grinned and shoved him back onto the bed. Alex laughed and quickly pulled me down with him, knotting his fingers in my loose hair to hold me to his mouth. He didn’t had anything nasty to say about my morals, not like the nagging voice in my head that made my stomach hurt, he just wanted to touch me, to make me feel special. And that was all I needed.
I rocked my hips against his, wishing he would fuck me again just to take my mind off of everything.
“I want you to fuck me,” I whispered as I grabbed his hand, bringing it to my pussy. “Again, please.”
“Oh, so you do have manners,” he taunted. “But I’m sorry to disappoint you, I’m not twenty-five anymore – I can’t go again that quickly.”
Shit, right. I blushed and pulled away quickly. I guess I was getting a little ahead of myself.
“Sorry,” I said sheepishly. I pulled away tried to roll off of him but her grabbed me around the waist and jerked me back down on him.
“Where do you think you’re going?” Alex’s eyebrow rose questioningly. “I didn’t say I couldn’t get you off again.”
“I just assumed—”
“Stop assuming then.” He pushed his hand back between my legs, stroking my slit slowly. “Let me make you feel good, glykia mou.”
I shivered at the husky sound of his voice right next to my ear and bowed my head, burying my face in his shoulder while I laid on top of him. His fingers were magic, the way he could manipulate my clit and g-spot at the same time made my head spin. He finger fucked me slowly while kissing my neck, drawing soft moans from me while I pushed back on his hand. Every part of me was still tuned into him; the way he moved under me, the way his breathing got heavier when I dug my nails into his shoulders, and how his heart beat faster when I moaned.
Nothing could be wrong if it was with him. It just couldn’t be and I refused to let myself succumb to the guilt again.
Alex stopped suddenly and pulled the shirt up over my head, discarding it onto the floor quickly and rolling me onto my back. He knelt between my legs and I could feel his gaze sweeping over me in the dark, searing into my skin while his hands slid up the length of my torso to my tits. I reached for him, pulling him down on top of me so that I could feel him. I wrapped my legs around his waist while his tongue flicked over my nipples, swirling around them until my toes curled and my back arched off the bed.
“You’re so easy to read,” he murmured against my skin. “Do you do this all for me?”
I shook my head and struggled to form words for a moment. Was his goal to torture me by just stopping like that? “No,” I answered thickly. “But sometimes I play it up for the videos I send you…”
Alex started to laugh and bowed his head, resting against my stomach. “I can’t believe you just ruined my favorite part of the day.”
Whoops. I giggled and covered my face with a long groan. “I didn’t mean that I don’t like sending them to you!”
“Are you sure about that?” He sat up and pushed himself onto his side so that we were lying next to each other with him hand on my stomach.
Panic shot through from and I rolled over, ready to apologize profusely when I caught the smirk he wore and the mischievous glitter in his dark eyes. “I can’t believe you’re laughing at me.” I shoved him hard, but he didn’t even budge. “Ohmigod, I’m just never going to send you anything from now on.”
Alex pulled me closer and gave me a quick kiss. “How about I promise to be nice if you promise to continue sending me videos?”
As if I would ever stop sending him my little nighttime recordings. “I don’t think you know what nice is,” I replied haughtily. “And on my birthday. How am I supposed to move past this?”
“Oh, you’re such a dramatic thing.” He rolled his eyes. “But I’m sure I can figure something to make you feel better.”
“I’ve got something you can do,” I offered, trying to tempt him.
“And what would that be?”
“My bag on the couch has something in it that you could use to make it up to me.” I batted my eyes. “Do you want to go grab it?”
He sighed dramatically and pushed himself up. I watched him saunter out of the bedroom, his pants riding low on his hips. Seeing the way his muscle moved just reminded me of how attractive he was physically, not that it was an easy thing to forget, but it made me wonder why he didn’t have someone long-term. Or why his wife left. My eyes darted briefly to his phone, staring at it suspiciously before forcing myself to look away. That’s not my business. But holy shit did I want to ask him about it.
“This purse?” he asked, holding up my Coach bag.
“That’s the one.”
Alex brought it back over to the bed for me and I took it from him to dig out the vibrator. The curved red and gold LELO toy was heavy and soft in my palm, and while I was holding it I found it surprisingly difficult to actually look at Alex. For whatever reason, talking about masturbation abstractly was okay, but actually holding the physical evidence was a lot different. Not a little, a lot.
“Now that looks different than the one I’ve seen you use before,” he remarked coyly. “Is that a remote?”
It was. “Yup.” I held it out to him. “So, are you going to make it up to me?”
I should have known better than to expect a simple “yes,” but I don’t think I could have prepared myself for suddenly being shoved back on the bed with Alex furiously working his way down the length of me. I gasped and grabbed at the sheets under me just as his mouth closed around my nipple, teasing it with a gentle brush of his teeth and swirl of his tongue. His hand went back to my pussy, forcing his fingers into me without hesitation.
He stopped as quickly as he started, but I didn’t have any time to complain because immediately he replaced his fingers with the toy. I inhaled sharply at the sudden pressure on both my g-spot and clit. I’d only used this toy once, just to make sure I actually liked it, and it was easy to forget just how it felt in the short time that it had spent in my dresser.
Alex straddled my thigh, I felt his cock against my leg, taunting me that I couldn’t get to feel him inside me again. I shifted under him before he took the remote, rubbing myself against him in the hopes that maybe I could get him hard again. I registered the faint click of the button before the sudden pulsing of the toy that made my hips jerk in surprise.
“Oh, fuck,” I gasped out.
Alex chuckled and brushed his fingers across my breasts. I covered my mouth and threw my head back in ecstasy, revelling in the feel pleasure that radiated from everywhere he touched me.
“Don’t do that,” he warned, pulling my hand back. “I want to hear you when you come for me. Understood?”
He stared down at me with a fixed glare that only served to make me wetter. “Yes.”
He let go of my hand and cupped my face, lightly running his thumb across my cheekbone. “Yes what?”
“Yes, Daddy,” I whispered as a shiver vibrated through me.
His mouth met mine just as my back arched off the mattress and he pushed my hands above my head, pinning me under him. I gasped against his mouth and writhed as I got closer to the edge. Trapped between him and the bed was the best place I could imagine being, feeling his strength made me want to cling to him and fight his hold. Alex groaned and pressed his hips harder against my thigh, he was getting hard again.
I squirmed and jerked my hand out of his hold, reaching frantically for his pajama bottoms to get them off. He took the hint and pulled back just enough to toss his pants on the floor, in a fraction of a second he had the vibrator off and slipped it out of me. I groaned in disappointment from being so close again, but before I could voice my complaint, he was in me again. My eyes flew open and I cried out in surprise, throwing my hand against his chest and scratching him lightly.
“This is what you wanted, isn’t it baby girl?” he growled, taking hold of my hips.
“Yes, Daddy,” I thanked him again. “Please fuck me!”
My pussy ached from him, but the sensation of being overly full just made my eyes roll back and heat flower in my abdomen. No toy back home compared to him.
“You’re so fucking wet,” he whispered as he slammed into me again. “How am I supposed to let you go home now that I’ve finally gotten to fuck you?”
Please don’t ever leave me, not now. I pulled at his hands until he got the hint to lay over top of me and I wrapped my arms around his shoulder as my hips rose to meet his. “I’m only this wet for you,” I whispered against his cheek. “Only you, Daddy. Don’t let me go.”
“Never,” he promised huskily. “That’s my greedy little cunt now.”
Yours. Always. My head was spinning and all I could do was hold onto him desperately, biting into the muscle on his shoulder when I came to stop myself from screaming. Alex groaned suddenly and sped up. My wetness dripped down my thighs and made it easier for him to fuck me as hard as he wanted, even if it made me whine at his show of force.
No one was going to be able to make me feel the way he did. No one else would be my first. And I knew I was never going to love anyone the way I did right then, with my nails raking up his back and the feel of his mouth trailing sloppy kisses across my shoulder.
When he finished, I tightened my legs around him, pulling him as deep into me as he could get while he came. The warmth of cum gave me goosebumps and I refused to let go of him.
Alex rested his head between my breasts and partially laid on me with his arms around my waist. My fingers combed lazily through his messy hair, I gazed out the window with a faint smile, watching as the sky started to lighten again. The world outside was quiet and content and tried to whisk me away to sleep, but I didn’t want to when he was still awake.
“I want to spend more time with you,” Alex said quietly.
“Really?”
“Yes. I was thinking of getting a temporary apartment in Sacramento, but what I would really like is if you could travel with me more often. I could bring you to more events, you could be with me while I’m working…”
“You said you don’t really work,” I pointed out.
“I network, that’s a never-ending job.”
“Where would we go?”
He hummed thoughtfully for a moment before responding, “I was supposed to go to the Cannes film festival next week, but you already turned me down. I am going to Rome next month, and I have a house in the Bahamas that I spend a lot of time at lately. But we can go anywhere you want.”
I’d never had that sort of choice before and I didn’t even know where to begin. Spain had just instantly come to mind when he first brought up travelling, but where else? As long as it was with him, would it really matter?