Although Lexi was pleased that Greyson had finally opened up about his father and his reasons for leaving, she couldn't help but feel a little sad that Greyson hadn't felt able to open up to them privately about it first.
She knew that sometimes she could be a little blunt and it wasn't always conducive to opening up dialogue, especially with Greyson being as stubborn and hardheaded as she was, but they belonged to each other. She didn't like to think that he felt he couldn't open up to her for fear of being judged.
Did she really come off as uncaring and judgey? Perhaps she should try not to verbally poke them as often…maybe it would help.
"If the wind changes then your face will stay that way," Allen smirked from beside her as Greyson snorted.
"When did you turn into my grandmother?" Lexi retorted without thinking, as she whirled to face him.
She mentally kicked herself as she realized that it was probably her smart mouth that made them think she would react badly.
"Seriously, what's wrong?" Allen pressed, "You look like a bulldog chewing a wasp. What are you thinking about?"
"I'll have my sass back now thank you very much, " Lexi scowled, "I was just mulling over why you two don't feel that you can tell me things. I'm not going to bite your heads off, you know."
"Well that's debatable..." Geyson quipped dryly.
"I'm serious," Lexi whined as they both stopped in their tracks and looked at each with a perplexed look.
"Did…did she just whine at us?" Allen asked incredulously.
"I think so," Greyson answered, just as shocked as Allen was.
"Listen... if you two fucktards don't pack it in…" Lexi hissed as they collapsed into laughter.
"Lexi, stop worrying," Greyson said finally once his laughter had subsided, "It's not that we feel we can't tell you as a person. I think Allen will agree with me when I say that it's more a fear of being rejected. Deep down we know you won't and you'll work through whatever it is with us, but sometimes, it's just taking that first step."
Allen nodded in agreement.
"It's like throwing yourself off a cliff because once you start then you're at the point of no return. It's stupid really because once it's out there, we feel a whole lot better about things."
"Damn males. Look at the size of you and you're worried about words and revealing the past like it's some big mystery that you can't talk about because it might kill you. I think you'd both much rather charge headlong into a full scale war rather than talk about things that bother you." Lexi grumbled.
"Look who's talking…" Allen scoffed good naturedly.
"I should probably get a head start on checking out Brad's Pack defenses," Greyson said thoughtfully, changing the subject and hoping to divert Lexi's attention from her thoughts.
"Shouldn't you wait until your brothers have gone though? What if they see you and make assumptions?" she asked.
"How will they know if we're taking a walk together?" He asked with a sly smile, "As long as Allen doesn't mind me stealing you for a little while of course."
"Not at all," Allen answered quickly, "I need to check up on the status of the Dark Moon and catch up with Adam anyway. I've done no work at all since we got here and I can practically feel the stack of work growing the longer I leave it."
Lexi chuckled at his grimace as they headed back to their bedroom to grab a jacket each and make sure Allen had everything he needed.
As she shrugged her jacket on she stopped and turned to watch her mates chatting animatedly and smiled mournfully to herself.
Feeling her gaze on them. they both turned to look at her curiously and the faintest hint of a frown appeared on both of their faces at the same time.
"Do you ever think about how fucking unlucky we've all been with our families and their psychotic tendencies?" She asked suddenly as she smiled wryly.
"All the time," Allen answered seriously, putting the papers that he had held in his hand down on the desk and walking over to her.
He cupped her face in the palm of his hands and looked at her with such tenderness, that Lexi thought she might melt right then and there.
"But, I like to think that the Goddess gave us to each other because we are the only people in this world that can heal each other.Even if our childhood families are lost to us now, we have each other." He said softly, planting a gentle kiss on her forehead.
"We are our own family now, Lexi, and there's nothing that will ever change that. Sure, we've had it hard, but we got through it and found each other…against all the odds. I don't think you realize how rare it is for wolves that are mated outside of their species to actually find their mates, and the odds of a Lycan finding his mate?" Greyson laughed humorlessly, "It's practically nonexistent for my generation."
"But what if Eromaug..." Lexi started, her bottom lip trembling as she was suddenly overwhelmed with insecurity.
There had been so much sadness and loss in their lives already and so many people that wanted to see them fail, what was to stop more being thrown at them and worse still..what would stop them from succeeding in destroying them all.
"He won't." Greyson said sternly, "Whatever you are thinking of right now, will not happen. I promise you. Our past doesn't make us who we are today. Even if we ran or hid in the past, so many years have passed since those days and we have all emerged stronger and far more capable of handling whatever they choose to throw at us next."
"Enough of this self-doubt, Lexi. The Lycan Kingdom is just another issue that we will work on once Eromaug is dead and buried. I promise you that."
Lexi smiled halfheartedly up at them both as Greyson grabbed his jacket and shrugged it over his broad shoulders, opening the door and gesturing to Lexi with his hand.
"Shall we go for that walk now. Hopefully we can clear your head and give Allen a little time to work in peace without distractions."
Lexi nodded her head and smiled.
She wanted to tell them that killing Eromaug wasn't going to be that easy. It wasn't as simple as stopping his heart and burying him, but she didn't want to see that look of confidence and contentment disappear from their faces.
Just this once, she wanted to savor the illusion of normality in her life.
There would be time for them to talk this through later because she could guarantee that when it was time to talk about it, they were not going to be happy about it. Not one, single bit.