I’m a lightweight when it comes to booze, and even though I spaced them out, my stomach is like a washing machine, and my head’s foggy. I feel like if I go on one more ride, I might throw up, and I’m seriously regretting the four drinks I consumed in the past two hours. I’m so not myself and very aware of that warm cozy feeling when alcohol takes the sensible part of your brain and throws it in a dumpster full of feathers. I’m beyond tipsy, and my ability to reason and be logical is dancing on pink fluffy clouds.
“Come on, one more…. for me.” Bryant tugs Greta by the sleeve and tries to coax her to get on a massively high ride that throws you into the sky. It’s a hard limit for me, and I know Jyeon hates heights, so he has no chance. Greta, my little daredevil, has kept Bryant company on most of his choices, and I stuck to the moderate ones that don’t scare me half to death. He’s bossing her around and coaxing her, yet her fierceness is tamed since she downed too many beers.
They have been hilarious together for the last couple of hours. Bickering relentlessly, cozying up and acting like a couple for a while before bickering again. Flirting, then fighting. Holding hands, then Greta batting him over the shoulder for no reason, and he’s even piggybacked her twice. Bryant is doing his utmost to act like a gentleman, and Greta is doing her utmost to sass him and cause wars at every turn. She’s sure putting him through his paces, but as they have been side-by-side all evening, I feel like Greta is not against him. She’s smiling way more than usual and even laughs at his lame dad jokes.
Her attitude to Jyeon is softer too. When I’m removed as just cause from the equation, and she spends real one-on-one time with him, I think she likes who he is. She’s had a couple of chances to stand alone with him while Bryant took me on my ride choices, and they seem comfortable in one another’s company now. Unlike before. Greta has even been smiling and joking with him and stopped warning me to keep my distance.
“I’m close to throwing up, you know?” Greta protests but allows him to pull her along for the umpteenth time, and I shake my head, watching her leave with him. Unable to conceal my genuine smile and knowing look. They don’t even acknowledge us as he kidnaps her and drags her off toward the entrance for their next ride. Leaving us standing here like spare parts in a semi-quiet part of the park.
“They like each other. I think Bryant finally found the woman of his dreams.” Jyeon cuts into my line of view by stepping in front of me to face me. All soft-focused and handsome in the cool, dim night air, lit up by the strung fairy lights overhead. He’s rosy-cheeked, and his nose is a little pink-tipped, making him adorably cute while trussed up in his leather jacket. It takes the ruggedness out and puts the pretty boy in front of me.
“I think so too. They have a weird dynamic, though. Greta seriously doesn’t want to let her guard down and see the good in him. She can’t let him get too close.”
“Sounds like someone I know.” Jyeon nudges my foot with his in a playful manner and has me blushing as I click on what I said. Giggling at the irony. I can’t argue with it.
“I have reason….” I turn with a raised brow and mischievous smirk, wander back along the open path, and know immediately by the warmth behind me that he’s close on my heels. Shadowing me and never more than a foot away at any given time. Although, much like Bryant, he’s been on his best behavior. He’s paid for every ride, held my bag and jacket several times, and bought me an endless amount of candy floss, ice cream, and popcorn while walking this infinite place.
“Then tell me how to start making up for it. What I can do, say….. I’m serious. I need pointers. I want to know what it will take to get you to give me a chance.” Jyeon catches my wrist from behind and steps beside me, sliding his grip down until he finds my fingers and properly takes my hand in his. Interlacing our digits, they are snugly held, and I frown at him. Goosebumps all over at something so simple, but I have given up denying that he makes me react like this with a single touch.
“We progressed to hand-holding now? Is that where we’re at? I wasn’t aware we are so cozy together.” I jest, shaking it lightly as though to dislodge him, but he only squeezes tighter. Not letting go, smiling cheekily, he shrugs before falling in step with me.
“I mean…. We could do something else if you prefer.” Jyeon leans in with a grin as though swooping in for a kiss, and I turn my head fast and cover his mouth with the palm of my free hand. Stopping us dead where we are and bashing his shoulder with a light slap when I free his face.
“Behave. You’re drunk. We’re enjoying a night of friendship and fun, remember?” I scold him, but it’s without seriousness. Mellowed tonight and enjoying his company.
Jyeon is on the worse side of tipsy due to way more beer than us, but he’s still lucid, just braver with it. His flirting has upped a gear, although he has kept his hands to himself until now. Probably because Greta would castrate him if she saw him getting touchy-feely with me. My rottweiler is not present, and he has no fear of being bitten.
“If I divorce you, can we date? Start over. Put the past to bed and make it new. Cleanse us of our mistakes and get remarried when we’re ready?” He winks at me and leans in, trying to get me to look him in the eye now we’re alone, and I dodge it. Turning to put my chin down and tug him onward again to keep walking. I'm aware we’re still holding hands, yet I don’t mind the soft warmth of his skin on mine. It makes me feel gooey and weird, and I’m experiencing teen butterflies. It’s like being back then when even his mere presence turned me into a useless blob of a girl who could only sigh whenever he graced me with his presence. Only now, he’s the one chasing me.
“Are you really doing this? I thought this was a casual night with no motive. You know why I’m resisting you.” My tone is far from stern, and I am stupidly smiling.
“Resisting, huh? That sounds like there’s hope for me and that you’re not against us deep down.” Jyeon tugs me back to him, stopping us in the middle of the path as some late-night park stragglers slide by. He steps into me to minimize our bulk so they don’t struggle and watches them wander off quickly. The park is open until midnight in the summer, but it’s not crowded at this late hour. We’re creating an obstruction, but he doesn’t seem to care and only turns back to face me with a slight mischievous furrow to his brow, eyes honing in on me, making me suspicious.
“Jyeon… it’s not that….”
My words are cut short by Jyeon darting down unexpectedly, catching me by the back of my neck with a firm hand and tugging me in, so our lips meet fast. I inhale so sharply because of his swift maneuver that I make a muffled gasp against his mouth. I’m shocked by its suddenness and bat him away, tugging my hand out of his to use both palms on his chest to separate us, but he holds tight. Gasping for breath because it feels like he sucker-punched me.
“What are you doing?” I accuse, widening my eyes at him, and am silenced by the complete lack of regret on his smiling face. Nose to nose, breathing combined air, and eyes locked on one another. Static in the air sizzling between us, my heart rate and breathing ups a gear in unison, making me so light-headed I fear I might pass out. Jyeon doesn’t seem fazed at all.
“I really want to kiss you properly. Remember what that’s like. You have no idea how much I have held back from doing this for the past hour. You’re crazy sexy in this dress.” He utters it softly, so his words tickle my lips, and I instinctively suck in my bottom one to bite it. A nervous habit I picked up over the past two years, realizing a little too late that it’s a significant turn-on for him, and he leans in and kisses me again.
I see it coming this time, and even though it gives me a chance to stop it or escape, I don’t move. Holding still and watching him with the huge doe eyes of a scared animal. He angles in slowly so our lips graze, erupting all kinds of shivers and tingles inside me, and his warm breath makes me goosebump. He gently molds his mouth to mine, pressing in against me with caution, a soft meeting with much less haste and force. My mind explodes with how Jyeon touches me, seeking permission with his lips, and I surrender to it.
I kiss him back as we find a rhythm together, and even though this isn’t the first time I’ve kissed him in my life, it feels different from any other. On our wedding day, times we kissed during sex back when we shared a bed. Soft pecking at first leads to something deeper and in sync. This feels like there’s real emotion behind it for him, which was always missing, and he teases my lips apart and slides his tongue in to meet mine halfway. Jyeon is a natural for me, and it’s easy to follow his lead and get lost in how good he is at this.
Our kiss melts into a passionate embrace. My hands move around his neck of their own accord, and I tug him down to stop straining on tiptoes to his tall height. His palms slide around my waist before smoothing over my ass and bringing our bodies together into one fluid form. Hugging close joined entirely, and I get lost in the headiness of being kissed senseless by him. Wrapped up safely in his strong arms, the entire length of his hard, sculpted body fitting to my every curve. My whole body tingles while my stomach and heart flip flop in giddiness.
He tastes of beer, ice cream, and his own unique Jyeon, and it’s a heady combination that heats my body and has me longing for more. My blood pulsing and inner desires burn bright after years of being dormant, and I find myself running my nails through his hair and urging him to add more passion to the mix. Throbbing between my thighs, my brain starts spiraling with craziness, severely wanting him to go further.
Jyeon moves from one side to the other, breaking apart only briefly to change position and brush noses. He angles and returns to devastate my hormones on a whole different level. He makes me insane with need, as though there’s never been a reason to deny him. Deepening the kiss to horny levels of instinctual fervor. I want him so badly; he has every part of me clinging on and devouring what he’s giving. Maybe it’s because I haven’t had this in six years, but I practically hop onto him, fully ready to have him strip me naked and take me where I stand.
Damn alcohol.
“Shit.” Jyeon pulls away, flinching and letting go to search his inside jacket pocket with one hand, without moving away from me entirely. I felt it too. The intrusive vibrations of his cell phone in his breast pocket cutting into the hotness of what we were doing. “Great fucking timing,” he murmurs, kissing me on the nose in such a cute boy way with a dimpled, cheeky, but happy smile before hauling it out and frowning at the screen. I almost self-combust with swoon overload at that random and unexpected, sweet affection. Embarrassed now we’re face to face and no longer making out, and yet he’s acting like it was the most natural thing.
Still, his arm is around my waist, so I am held to him, and his hand is very comfortably resting over my butt cheek where he was gripping a second ago. One of my hands on his shoulder and the other on my chest to calm my erratic breathing.
“Gimme a sec. I have no idea who this is. It might be important.” He frowns at the screen, letting go of me fully, and answers his cell before stepping back to give me breathing space, and I take a second to try and cool down.
My face is flushed, my cheeks are burning, and my heart is pounding through my chest like I just ran a marathon. I feel like I’ve been thoroughly ravaged, yet I’m craving his hands back on me and cold from his lack of body heat. I am suddenly aware of how very female I feel in my shortish dress and a light jacket and how very male Jyeon is in his t-shirt and jeans under a leather jacket. All hard abs and muscle as he towered over me.
I have a severe case of warm panties, and I can’t believe he can fire me up like this after everything between us. So ready to throw caution to the wind. So prepared to forget the past and how much he hurt me. Forget he’s been with someone else, and I haven’t. I can barely remember what sex feels like, yet I know it was never unenjoyable with him. He was never a selfish lover between the sheets, yet I don’t know how I’ll feel if we go there and thoughts of him and her invade the act itself. I don’t even know if that will happen.
After just a kiss, I can’t believe I am even contemplating that. A half-drunk one at that, and how stupid I’m being. I mentally shake myself, catching my stupid ass brain and reminding myself how insane this is. He’s my husband… to be ex-husband. Not the reason I came back, and I am complicating things by even doing this. Don’t I have any willpower?
“Wait, what… who?” His serious tone pulls me out of my dreamy brain, and I blink at him as he paces back and forth about three feet from me. His change in posture and attitude attract my full attention. “Yeah, I know her… no, I’m not her guardian. I don’t know what family she has.”
He doesn’t sound happy at all. He’s getting tenser by the second, his voice huskier with attitude, and he runs his hand through his hair and stops dead, mid-step. Sure signs of him being pulled back to sober with some problematic issue. I have no idea what it is, but probably OLO, and I don’t miss that at all. My life was never my own at any time, night or day.
“She did what?” His face pales, even in the dimness of the evening with artificial lights, and he casts a glance my way, frowning hard before chewing on his lip and listening to whatever they are saying. “Look, can I call you back. I need to figure it out, and I’m not exactly in a good place to be talking about this.” He pauses again, poised and listening with his unreadable expression taking over, and I know this isn’t good. He’s returning to boss mode, and whatever fun we were having has just ended. Not that it’s a bad thing, as I am in no state to be making decisions on this man.
I can feel it coming. The little fantasy bubble popping loud and clear. My buzz of euphoria comes crashing down, and a tightening of my rib cage and a heaviness of anxiety in my stomach forewarn me something isn’t right with this, beyond my self-realization that I am an utter idiot.
“I’ll be there as soon as I can. Thanks… sure. Goodbye.”
He hangs up his call and tilts his head back, closing his eyes while facing skywards, and lets out a muffled groan, slumping his shoulders and leaving his cell to dangle by his side in his hand. New hostile energy around him like a shroud.
“Fuck my life.” He snaps into the cool air, aggravated with whatever that call was, and then rubs his hand across his face.
“What is it? What’s wrong?” My nerves are piqued, and I’m internally turning into a jabbering mess. I hate this foreboding feeling. Losing my drunk headiness as adrenalin kicks its butt out of my system.
Jyeon turns and stares at me, trying his best to hide whatever he’s thinking, adjusting his features to soften them, and walks towards me again. He returns his cell to his jacket and reaches for me with one hand.
“Talk to me? What is it?” I sound desperate, a thick, cloying feeling in my throat choking me, and I know it’s because I am reading the change in him and his energy. Knowing him the way I do.
Jyeon tugs me into his arms, into a hug, and wraps me up tight so my face is against his chest and his chin tucks behind my right shoulder so we can’t get any more bodily close. My arms are trapped against him while he lassoes me with his. He exhales heavily, seemingly thinking about what to say, confirming this is bad. His tension is pulsing through him to me, and I can feel how taut his muscles now are compared to a minute ago. Jyeon is going through the motions of President Park in damage control and being very careful about his chosen words.
“I have to take you home…. I don’t want you to overthink or take anything from this, but I have no choice. This is my fault, and it should be me who goes there… but…… I love you, Sohla. You believe that, right? This isn’t a game, and I have no motive other than to start a new life with you. There’s no one else in my heart but you. If there was anyone else who could go…… I’m sorry. Don’t be mad at me.” He pulls back to look me in the face, and all I can do is screw mine up in confusion. Feeding on his worry. No clue what he’s even talking about.
“What are you saying?” My voice trembles, not concealing how nervous this is making me.
Jyeon leans in gently and kisses me lightly on the lips. A nothing pressing together in the same manner he kissed my nose before, yet it doesn’t bring the same gushing response from me. I can feel his heart hammering as fast as mine through his rib cage, and his nervous energy suffocates. It adds to the growing hysteria that’s swirling in the pit of my stomach.
“You’re making me uptight… just say it.” It’s a quiet and desperate plea because he’s hesitating, and he pulls me back in close to hug me once more. Stroking my hair down my back and taking a moment to inhale slowly and heavily, filling his lungs with my scent. Delaying the inevitable and making this worse.
“I need to go to the hospital, and I don’t know for how long……….. Claire tried to commit suicide.”