Tears, gasping for air, and stuttering the words out, almost yelling every single word because each time I was afraid, my voice would fail me, or my voice would break. Images that were taken straight out of a bad alien movie from the 80s played in my head; only it was now involving a giant hairy baby with massive claws and canines and my limp, bloody body.
"My silly little human, none of that will happen. I am sorry, sweet plum."
He sat on the floor with me, cradling me on his lap while stroking my hair repeatedly.
"It's just a little baby. No claws, canines, or fur in places you don't want them. Your body is perfect for me and my cubs. So, breathe, it will be fine. You are safe; I will always make sure you are-both of you. There is nothing to worry about; it is just positive. If you think of it, you will get to meet the little cub sooner. Instead of 9 months, you only need to wait five months."
I could hear, through my snotty, sobbing cloud, that he tried to make the mood lighter using a jokingly tone, but instead, I just cried harder,
"But what if I kill you? "
I wailed, not able to see the foolishness in my own statement.
"I can't survive five months with that growling, glaring, and being cut off from everyone else but you!"
I cried in his arms for a while, and several minutes went by in silence. The only thing I heard was my sobbing, uncoherent rambling, and the sound of my heartbeat echoing in my ears. Slowly, it felt like I came back to myself, and I realized what I just said and that he never even answered or said anything after that. His shirt was stained with tears and snot, and finally, my fogged brain had the decency to react with anything other than pain, fear, and uncontrollable crying: Embarrassment.
" I am not going to kill you."
I whispered, soaking in embarrassment. I felt stupid how I reacted, and it felt like my brain was working against me. Bringing up image after image, memories of stupid things I said, how I have to look right now, how he looked while using his freaking shirt as a handkerchief. Oh god, now I just want the ground to swallow me whole!
"I know, I know! You're not fat enough to kill me yet! But, you know, there is one way to calm Igor down."
Surprised, I looked up. A soft smile and kind eyes sparkled as our eyes met. A wave of disbelief and relief washed over me; how can he still want me? I look like a mess; I act like a mess. A mean and snarky mess even.
"How?"
"Let me, let us mark you as our mate."
I knew that was his answer, then why did I ask? I had no idea; I now understood more about this mate bond and marking, but for some reason, I didn't want it. On one side, all I wanted was to be his. To stay beside Arcane for the rest of my life, see our children grow and grow old together. Then again, there was another side of me, more like a shadow in my mind whispering we didn't want this. My heart rate spiked before I answered as calmly as I could,
"Is there no other way?"
I didn't want to say no. I could not explain it, could not word the feeling, but I didn't want to hurt him either. I didn't want to lose him or make him feel rejected again; however, right now, I can't say yes to that. I can't accept him marking me as his.
"I don't think it is. Igor is reacting this way because he needs every other male to understand that you belong to him. Belong to us."
"Oh."
I didn't know what else to say, so instead, I avoided his gaze and got to my feet. Brushing invisible dust off my clothes, I pretended not to notice how his eyes burned on my skin. After making 110% sure there was no more invisible dirt on me, I opened to say something stupid about food and whatnot. Instead, a loud sound echoed through the air. It's like someone blew a horn, and not only once. A bit worried, I started franticly looking around, scanning the deck.
Only seconds ago, there had only been me and Arcane out here, but now, while that sour-sounding horn still filled the air, everyone seemed to pour out on deck from all directions. Running around, I had no idea what was happening or what everyone was doing. They just seemed to run across the deck, around one another aimlessly. A warm hand wrapped around mine, and my attention was brought back to Arcane, giving me the focus needed back to take in what was happening around us and giving me headspace enough to be scared.
"What is going on?"
I tried to yell over the sound of the horn and other men shouting to one another while stumbling after Arcane, who was now dragging me along towards the door and stairs leading down below the ship.
"Arcane??"
"Come!"
"Arcane! What´s happening?"
"Land, we reached land! Now, come!"
Land? We are here?! Without thinking, a wide smile spread across my face, and I yanked my hand out of his and turned to run to the ship's railing. To face the shore as we sailed up to the barbarian's pack, the place Tew grew up and Eir should have grown up.
Filled with excitement, I only took two steps, the third already slowing down, and the fourth step rooted me to the cold wooden floors.
Everything happened so fast and so slowly at the same time. Turning around and starting to run went by before I could blink twice, but after that, everything slowed down. I heard Arcane shout my name behind me, but it sounded like he yelled from another world while my head struggled to take in and understand what emerged in front of me.
There it was, the beach line I had waited so longed to see. The land I dreamed of reaching so I could be a step closer to finding Eir. He reached me just as it all sank in. His hand grabbed mine and tried pulling me back, but I resisted. A strange whining sound pushed up my throat.
It looked like a war zone! Even if we were still far away, I could see people and wolves running franticly along the beach, in between burning houses and fences, crying, shouting, and roaring. Suddenly, my nostrils filled with thick and heavy smoke-filled air.
"What...w"
"Come, don't look! COME! It will be fine, I promise! Let Tew and Hades figure out what is happening!"
My feet didn't move; I just stared at the burning chaos ahead.
"What does this mean?"
This was wrong; everything about this is wrong!
The beautiful scenery with steep hills and green fields lined up with lush patches of thick wild forest. The sun mirrored every single sun ray in the slow-dancing waves before they washed up the fine sand beach next to three wooden piers.
The piers towered over dancing mountains perfectly displayed on the clear blue water. But the image is ruined, under attack by evil, and every nerve in my body vibrates-a strange mixture of despair, shock, anger, and a deep-rooted sense of helplessness. I wanted them to stop. Make them see what they are doing, what they are destroying.
We watched thick smoke lines spiraling up from several places scattered throughout the village just above the beach. I saw wolves fighting, crawling away with a trail of blood on the ground. People ran around, and screams of pain, fear, and cheer panic blended into a heartbreaking and bone-chilling sound.
"Maya, come now. "
Arcane didn't shout this time; it was lower and closer to my ear.
"Yes.."
I breathed back, ready to let him take me away from this. With his arm around me, we turned our backs to the grotesque view. Just as my foot touched the first step of the stairs, loud gasps spread across the chip, and we both spun around to see what happened. Everyone looked at the same, and I followed their shocked gazes. My heart skipped a beat.
Like a massive black shadow figure flew across the open sky.
"Dragon.. Dragon! Oh god! Look, Arcane, it is a freaking dragon!"
It was some misplaced, but I screeched like a teen girl walking by her favorite actor or something, but it is. Freaking dragon! It only takes a couple of seconds, and it hit me: the dragon is here.
"Arcane.. Are dragons normal here? Like, big pack or something?"
"No.. "
"Then where is Eir?"
"We need to figure that out later, and you need to go down now!"
He slammed the door shut behind me already a couple of steps down, so I stopped and listened. Waiting, I could hear the chaos coming closer. Shouting and yelling began to sound more like words, and the sound of snarling and howling rose to the sky. Then the ship stopped, and I rushed up to peek through the door. I waited for the sound of running to disappear into the chaos before I carefully opened the door. The massive creature in the sky was already far away, flying towards the mountains towering over the wild forest miles away from the chaos spreading right in front of me.