Macy POV
It is like waking up from a deep sleep. My eyes struggle to focus against the light, and I don't know where I am. To say I am disoriented is an understatement.
Someone touches me on the shoulder, and I try to get away. I trip over my feet and fall face down in the dirt. I don't try to get up at first. Instead, I lie there and try to compose myself.
"Macy," Destin's voice breaks the silence.
Rolling onto my back, I squint up at him. He looks different. Before Astoria took over, there was no concern for me in his eyes. Now, he looks at me like I might break. I wonder what has changed.
There is also a difference in how he looks. He is covered head to toe in armor. There is a silver sword at his side and a shotgun strapped to his back. He has been in battle. His normally flawless skin is littered with scars, including a deep one across his eye. I cock my head to the side and wonder why he didn't heal himself.
He reaches out to help me up. I take his hand, and he pulls me to my feet. Every muscle in my body hurts, and I wince as I steady myself on my feet.
"How long was I gone?" I groan.
"Six or seven months," he Strugs.
The fog in my mind lifts, and I look at him like he is crazy. "What do you mean, six or seven months?"
"It is hard to say," he replies. "The days have begun to bleed together."
" I don't understand," I mutter. "Why didn't you demand that she bring me back? I am supposed to be leading the troops."
Anger burns in my chest. How could Astoria keep me locked away for that long? The war was my idea. I should have been here to fight. No one will think of me as a capable Queen now. They will assume that I have hidden behind her.
"Astoria thought it was best to keep you away from the battles," Destin sighs. "She didn't think you could kill indiscriminately."
"I killed Roland," I snap.
Destin frowns. "Did you? Or did Astoria?"
I feel sick. Maybe she was right, but she had no right to make that decision for me. I could have killed if I needed to.
"And I suppose Astoria kills as she pleases," I grumble.
Destin scratches the back of his neck." She turned the outcome of the war. Between her and Douglas, Selene's forces are depleted."
I frown and look around. "Where is Douglas?"
"He was killed," Destin whispers.
"Oh," I gasp.
It is all overwhelming. Knowing that Astoria killed hundreds while I was locked away is terrifying. What if she takes over again? What if next time she doesn't let me come back? She has been decidedly quiet since I woke up. That alone makes me suspicious of her, but I decide not to dwell on it.
"Where are we?" I ask.
"The royal mansion."
Goddess. How could I have forgotten? Raven is sick, and my parents are missing. I was meant to come here immediately, but now it has been half of a year. I have lost so much time. I run in the direction of the mansion, but Destin stands in my way.
"There are things you need to know."
"Move out of my way," I snarl at him.
He steps to the side, and I race past him. "Raven is dying," he calls out.
I skid to a stop. "No, she is just sick."
"Selene took the moon," Destin informs me. "The werewolf world is in shambles. Everyone is depending on you."
I spin around. "What am I supposed to do? I don't know how to fix any of this. The war was a mistake. Everyone is dying."
"You knew there would be losses," he spits at me. "It was seen."
"Don't you tell me what was seen," I growl. "I have been seeing it my whole life. Death and destruction at my hands. I will never forgive myself for this. I should have gone quietly like Selene wanted me to."
Destin closes the distance between us. "What happened to you?"
"Nothing," I shrug. "Let me say goodbye to Raven. Then I will call to Selene. I will end this once and for all."
Destin reaches for me, but I don't want his comfort. I step back and shake my head. He is not my mate. Making me feel better is not his job. I turn and run to the mansion.
Leo is holding the door open. I barely look at him as I dart past him. My legs burn as I take the stairs two at a time. Bursting into the main suite, I see Raven lying on the bed. Her normally red lips are pale, and her hair has fallen out. She does not look like the Queen I knew. She is frail.
This hurts more than I thought it would. Raven and I didn't see eye to eye at the end, but that wasn't her fault. She loved me for a lot of my life, and I loved her. I approach her bed and sit on the edge.
Her eyes flicker open, and they are void of color. "Macy," she whispers. "It took you long enough."
The corners of her flips turn up, and I catch a glimpse of what she used to be. I return the smile even though I am not sure she can see it. "I got held up by a psychopath in my mind."
She laughs, but it is interrupted by a sharp cough. Leo rushes in and tips a glass of water to her lips. She touches him gently, and I feel sick.
"How are my boys?" Leo asks.
"Stubborn," I joke.
Raven smiles. "You will take care of them and Wren, won't you."
"Don't be silly," I say, choking back my sobs. "You are going to take care of them."
"Promise me," she insists.
Leo cuts me a cold glare. He wants me to lie to her. "I will take care of everyone."
"Good," she breathes.
Her eyes fall shut, and her breathing is labored. Leo places a kiss on her forehead and pulls the covers up around her neck. I can't bear to be there any longer.
As I am leaving the room, Leo calls after me. "Where are you going?"
"To fix this," I respond.
When I step outside, I look up at the sky. Selene is up there looking down at me. I am sure of it, but I don't know how to get to her.
Then I remember what Nyx said, "Not everything thing needs wings to fly."
I close my eyes and push off the ground. Wings sprout from my back, and I sour through the air. I climb higher and higher through the clouds until I see the moon. It is still there, hidden from the world, and Selene is waiting for me on it.