I froze, but Nolan did too. I didn’t know how much he saw, but me standing over his very dead brother in an entirely blood-stained white dress probably didn’t look so good.
I opened my mouth, trying to un-freeze, but Nolan moved first. He bolted, shifting almost mid-air, that shocked me more than anything.
I willed my feet to move, and they finally did. I started to stumble after him, my mind racing with all the negative possibilities, and my body fought to keep up.
Can we catch him? - I asked Aksala
We’ve only shifted once - she explained gently, too gently.
That would take time, and by now, he would already be almost back in the eyesight of the crowd if he wasn’t already.
I could have maybe thrown the dagger; I could have tried to shift earlier, but that was no use now. I knew in the back of my mind that I made a huge mistake. I wasn’t listening hard enough, wholly focused on my own fight. You always had to be aware of the greater battle around you. There rarely was only one opponent, one threat, even in one-on-one combat, unless it was during training.
I made a grave error. A huge one.
My stomach rolled, and I stumbled toward the tree line, searching for the sack that held my things. The trees seemed to close in, and my head got hotter with each of my too-short breaths. I had to focus. I had to get out of here. Nolan was probably back by now.
I had to count my losses. I got two of them. Hunter was one of the worst and probably the future Alpha. At least Nolan might be good for the pack.
Rational thoughts are good. Focus on those and take deep breaths - Aksala soothed.
I tried, but my chest wouldn’t expand enough to accept the air. I kept trying, focusing on breathing as I hastily got changed, my fingers shaking, making it hard.
I wanted Ezra. I needed to talk to him. Or should I leave now while they were probably thrown off and deep in their confusion?
I threw the scraps of the white dress back out through the trees. Not that it really mattered anymore, but my most recent instinct was to hide, to cover my tracks. However feeble an attempt that was.
I stumbled through the trees, slowly regaining myself. Focusing on logical steps. What were my options? Where could I go for now? How long would I have to hide?
Footsteps sounded in the distance, and I ducked under a fallen tree until my heartbeat let me listen enough to Ezra's familiar steps. I let him come closer to me, still reeling, not wanting this conversation.
What would he say? Would this be the last time I saw him? Did I ruin everything for him, too?
“Simone?” he called quietly, barely a whisper on the wind.
“Yes,” I croaked.
He took a few long steps and stopped in front of where I was hiding. I peered up, and he had a hand stretched out to me. I studied his face in the darkness. He had his mercenary mask on, hard and assessing but not worried. Never worried. I didn’t care if it wasn’t real; it comforted me to the point of breaking.
“What happened?” he asked.
“Nolan saw me. Well, I don’t know how much he saw, but he saw more than enough.” I put my hand in his and let me pull me up.
“He did?” his eyes widened slightly, but his brows bunched in confusion. He looked away as if he were calculating something.
“Yes…?” I responded, if he didn’t know that Nolan saw me, why was he here? “What happened?”
“Nolan came back with a scrap of the maiden’s dress and said he let her go,” Ezra responded.
I took a step back but didn’t dare let go of his hands. Ezra still seemed as if he were deep in thought, assessing.
“And?” I asked after a moment.
“That was it.” He finally looked back at me, but the slight tug of his dark brows remained. “Warriors will be here to look for Hunter. Nolan said that he was left behind, but that was all.”
I bunched my brows. “But he saw,” I repeated.
“I know,” Ezra said, his jaw tighter than usual. “I’m unsure of what that means now. He didn’t say it outright, but he could use it as leverage…” He shook his head slightly. “But that doesn’t make sense since he’s the last one left. Why didn’t he claim he killed him or tell them that you did?” He voiced my swirling thoughts.
“Maybe he was confused?” I suggested. “He just ran.”
One of his eyebrows raised slightly. “Would you have stopped him? If you had the chance?”
“Yes,” I admitted looking down.
I would have ended him to keep my secret if I could have, even if I was unsure if he deserved it. That thought actually felt sour and wrong, and maybe I felt a little guilty about that. Or maybe I was just worried how Ezra would judge me for admitting that.
He nodded. “I understand,” was all he said. “We need to figure out if he talks and what he says. Or what he has said.” His eyes were sharp again. “Has anyone seen you in bed?” he asked.
I shook my head. “This event started before my usual bedtime.” I pinched the bridge of my nose. My first thought was to scale the wall, especially now that I had more core strength than I had the first time. But there were far too many people around and far too many people outside the packhouse.
“I’m going to sneak you in,” he decided. “I’ll meet up with Nolan. I’m supposed to anyway after the trial. I’ll see what he says, if anything.” He nodded slightly to himself. Even now, I couldn’t help but think that small gesture was more than he would have ever given weeks ago. “I want you to bolt the door, pack a bag, and answer to no one but me or your attendant.”
“Okay-” I said, but my voice broke.
Fear gripped me, its cold hand wrapped around my chest. I couldn’t imagine going back into that place. I had to run. If Nolan didn’t speak immediately due to shock or confusion or… It didn’t matter. If he didn’t speak out now, he would. It was just a matter of time. Would he do it in a few hours? Tonight? Tomorrow?
“I’ll get preparations ready,” Ezra said, gazing into the last sparse trees that separated us from the packhouse. I didn’t realize we had covered that much ground.
“Okay,” I think I said out loud.
“If I tell you to run, you run.” Ezra squeezed my hand his gaze met mine. “I’ll find you.” His words held so much sincerity. I wanted to ask how, but at that moment, I believed him. “I’ll find you,” he promised.
We gripped each other’s hands, and I nodded. He took the lead as I took all my mental capacity and willpower to remember how to walk. Ezra stilled as we reached the last trees, him as calm and unmoving as a statue, but I couldn’t stop my stupid heart from racing. He rubbed circles on the back of my hand, and I couldn’t believe how that soothed me to my roots.
We’re okay - Aksala repeated, almost like a lullaby.
I looked around, a part of my logic woke up, and it alerted me that I needed to assess the situation. Warriors were milling about the now mostly empty stands. The new part of the packhouse was bright and lit and showed people enjoying themselves inside. At least I could place the audience, but I was unsure if it was a good or bad thing that any outside witnesses were so far away from my bedchambers.
I kept scanning the scene for what might have been a long while. It wasn’t until the warriors cleared the now vacant stands and started walking the trail that we made a move.
The canopy of the trees disappeared, and we were under the twinkling night sky that, in its vastness, felt too confining.
He walked tall, and I trailed in his shadow. I ducked my head but tried to keep my senses open. There were feet, a lot of footsteps, and some hushed murmurs. I let myself relax a bit; I needed to relax, or I couldn’t fully protect myself.
Once we neared the door that led to the stairs closest to my room, Ezra slowed his steps. He squeezed my hand one last time; it was long and lingering, and he brushed his lips to my temple. “You’re okay… Go,”
I double-checked and saw the empty gardens. The party was still in full swing in the bright glass extension and trailed away. Ezra stayed standing where I left him. I didn’t dare look back, but somehow I knew. It was only when I reached the darkest shadows of the packhouse that I knew he headed toward the stands and the warriors.
It didn’t escape me that I was putting my entire future and trust into the person that was hired to out me. But I did trust him. I couldn’t stomach the fact it was all a lie; it didn’t need to be, not to this point.
No, I knew Ezra. I was just spiraling into my negative thoughts.
It’s okay; we’re okay - Aksala kept purring until I almost believed her.
The entire time I showered, I jumped at any slight noise I perceived or thought I did. I kept stepping out of the shower to listen. It took me ages to scrub the bit of blood and dirt off my hands and face.
After I was thoroughly clean and the shower held no lingering trace of blood, I put on the tightest clothes I had left under a nightgown. I ensured that a window was unlatched and opened above my small terrace that was mostly for show, but I knew it could be used by someone skilled.
My bag was packed behind the curtains.
I practiced my leave from my bed. Covers off, duck, and roll. Sling the bag over my shoulder. Open the window and go… I figured I could be out in under ten seconds.
The door jiggled and then again, and I jumped. A soft knock came, and Alice called my name. I scrambled from the bed and unlatched it, rubbing my eyes.
“Oh, you’re already in bed?” she asked.
I yawned a bit and shrugged. “Not really.” I motioned to my wet hair. Alice glanced at the door again, but she nodded, a pitying but familiar look crossed her face. I knew she understood. Or she thought she did. The threat of death was too much for anyone.
I sat, fighting everything in me to keep still as Alice slowly bushed my hair. She seemed like she had something to say, but she kept her mouth shut and just hummed a tune without a melody.
“There,” she said, satisfied with my hair. I tried to smile at her in the mirror, but she turned away too quickly.
“Alice?” I asked.
It was stupid, so stupid, but I had done worse, even tonight.
She stopped and stared at me. “Hm?”
“Make sure Amber is hidden tonight,” I begged. It came out before I could stop myself, but I didn’t want to.
Alice looked confused for a moment, but she nodded. “Of course,” she agreed, but her brows never settled as she closed the door.
I don’t know when or if I fell asleep that night, but I was startled by a sound on my windowpane. It kept scratching against the frame, and I realized it was storming outside the open window.
I groaned and went to shut it, but a dark shadow reached up before me.
“Shit,” I gasped, holding the dagger in front of me.
Ezra chuckled deeply. “I guess you can still borrow that,” he rumbled. “Nolan told me, and as far as I can tell, everyone else the same story. He let the maiden go. Hunter was dead. That was all the details.”
I swallowed, I didn’t understand.
“I’ll take the next watch; you go back to sleep.”
“No, it's my turn,” I mumbled, my words almost slurring. I sand into the floor where he sat on my windowsill, my head lulling against one of his legs.
I fell asleep, cradling his dagger.