Davonyé
I can’t focus at all on Friday. My thoughts continuously return to Ariella and what I saw yesterday.
“You excited to see your sisters?” Carisse asks as we arrive in Ontario.
I take a quick look at her. She’s smiling. “Yeah.”
“Me, too. I’m lookin’ forward to eating some of your mom’s cookin’ more, though.”
“Yeah. Ma’s cookin’ is the best...” I grip the steering wheel tighter. Food is the last thing on my mind…
I hear her sigh. “I hope you cheer up while we’re here, babe. I hate seeing you like this.”
I roll my eyes. “I’ll be fine.” I wish she’d stop bangin’ on about this shit. I’ve already decided I’m gonna see how this weekend goes, and if I can’t get over this shit with Ariella, I’m gonna take a break from Carisse. I’ve got to for my own sanity. I can’t think straight, and I’m sick of forcing myself into making love to Carisse while I’m imagining it’s Ariella. I can’t keep using the excuse that I’m tired either; I sound like a damn female.
We arrive at my mom’s; it’s just after ten at night. I’m physically tired, and mentally, too. I grab our bags from the trunk and then we make our way inside.
“Vonyé!” My mother and sisters scream when I find them in the kitchen. I drop our bags before they all hug me.
I kiss the top of mom’s head. She’s got a short natural afro cuz her hair don’t really grow. She’s already dressed for bed; in her peach robe and matching slippers. Mom’s a shorty, and I’m reminded of Ariella, again.
Both my sisters look good. They don’t look any different from when I last saw them. Tinashe is short like mom, has dark eyes, and red braided hair down to her hips. We look the most alike out of all three of us.
Clarisha’s the oldest and doesn’t let anyone forget it. We’re all close, but she goes out of her way to make sure everyone’s good. She’s taller, still shorter than me though, and has lighter eyes and shorter hair that’s in a bobbed lace front right now, but it’s usually the same as mom’s.
I can’t lie, it feels good as shit to see them all. They hug Carisse and then we all sit at the table with hot cocoa topped with spiced whipped cream. Mom’s speciality.
“How’s Montreal? How’s school?” mom asks, firing questions at me like we ain’t spoke on the phone every week since I left.
“Good, and alright. School is intense but I’m gettin’ through the work.” I don’t blame my sisters for not finishing school. Shit is long sometimes.
“And what about you, Carisse? How are you finding it?”
“Good. It’s different, but the people are cool and I’ve made some good friends.”
“Are you gonna visit your mom and them while you’re here?” Tinashe asks her.
“Yeah. I thought I’d spend the day with them tomorrow and then see you all on Sunday before we go back home.”
I relax, relieved to be getting some space from her. Clarisha looks at me and frowns.
“How are you, anyways?” Carisse asks them. “How’re the husbands?” Carisse ain’t met them, and I’ve only met them at their joint wedding two years ago. They were cool enough. Mom knows them the best cuz she visits them all the time.
“They’re good. Busy, but good,” Tinashe replies while smiling her face off. “When are you two gonna get married?”
I grab my mug of cocoa and try to laugh off the question. Fuckin’ married!!!! Hellll no.
“Ignore him,” Carisse snaps. “He’s been acting weird all week.”
“Don’t start, Carisse,” I mutter. I knew she’d bring that shit up the first chance she got. Tryin’ to bait me in front of my family.
“What? It’s the truth,” she says, and then she looks at the others. “Please talk to him tomorrow. Find out what’s goin’ on with him cuz I can’t take much more.”
I roll my eyes but then clock the looks on everyone’s faces. Great, now tomorrow is gonna be one big interrogation that I don’t fuckin’ need.
***
Saturday, I wake up more unsettled than I already have been. I feel on edge, like somethin’s about to happen, again. I’m clearly losing my mind cuz it's as if I'm bein’ pulled back to Montreal, or at least towards that way. I love my mom and sisters, and I ain't seen them in a minute, but deep down the last place I wanna be is here.
I just wanna be with Ariella.
Badly.
And the fact that I can’t is making me moody as fuck.
I dunno if I’m subconsciously feeling a way cuz I know she’s waking up today or what, but I'm about ready to drive my ass five hours down there just so my mind can have some peace.
Carisse comes back from the bathroom and sits on the bed beside me. She’s only wearing a pink towel and it slips down to show her breasts when she fists my dick, but nothing happens. Once upon a time, I'd be hard and ready to fuck with her, but I can't even get a hint of a hard-on for her anymore.
“Babe…” She sighs, looking upset. “Don't you find me attractive anymore?”
No. And that’s the fucking problem. I don't, and today I'm feeling it the most.
I rest my head on my arm. “I just got a lot on my mind, Carr. Stop taking it so personal.”
She scoffs. “How can I not? Our sex life is practically non-existent when usually, we always at it. You barely get hard, and then when you do, you barely touch me. What did I do?”
“You ain't done shit,” I snap at her, sitting up in bed. “I just ain't feelin’ a hundred.” I get up and snatch up my things to go take a shower.
“Whatever. Fuck this,” I hear her mutter before I close the door to the bathroom.
I run the shower for a minute before I get under the spray. I think about Ariella and my dick gets so hard that it borderline hurts. I wrap my hand around it and catch a groan in the back of my throat. Ariella feels so damn good inside, so fuckin’ tight, and she even smells incredible, too. I think about how wet she got when I made her cum on my tongue, the way she finally moaned my name when she came on my dick, and how she’s so sexually innocent but so fucking alluring with those beautiful eyes of hers.
Fuck!
I close my eyes and bust off hard against the tiles.
What the fuck?
I hear Carisse come inside the bathroom but she soon leaves again. I wash up, but I end up knockin’ out another one while thinking about Ariella again.
“Come on, man,” I say to myself. “This shit has gotta stop.”
I hear Carisse leave while I’m getting dressed. I look out the window and see her getting into her mom’s car. I gotta break up with her. I got no choice. More importantly, though, I need to sort shit out with Ariella.
I sit on the bed and text her again. It’s still early; just after nine.
I need to speak to u. Message me when u get this.
I know I sound desperate as fuck, but I dunno what the fuck else to do.