Jake's POV
Lea was pregnant with Phill's child? That's what they told me but I still couldn't wrap my head aprund that fact.
I should have seen it coming. The glances, the whispers, the sudden need for privacy,the distance,the running away...How could I have missed it? Lea, my Lea, pregnant with Phill's child ? I felt like I'd been punched in the gut. The room spun, and all I could see was red.
"You gotta be kidding me!" I screamed, my voice raw and unrecognizable. The walls seemed to close in, mocking me with their stillness. My fists clenched, and I threw the first thing within reach.A framed picture of us at the beach last summer. It shattered against the wall, the glass splintering into a million pieces, much like my heart.
"How could she do this to me?" I roared, my voice echoing in the silence of my room. "With Phill of all people! That slimy, backstabbing son of a ..."
I couldn’t finish the sentence. My throat was tight, choking on the words. I reached for the whiskey bottle on my desk, the amber liquid was my only solace. With shaking hands, I unscrewed the cap and took a long swig, the burn in my throat was a welcome distraction from the pain in my chest.
But it wasn’t enough. The anger bubbled up,boiling over. I grabbed the bottle and hurled it at the wall, watching it explode into a cascade of glass and booze.
"Fuck this!" I yelled, the rage now a living thing, consuming me from the inside out. "Fuck her! And fuck Phill!"
I kicked over the chair, sending it crashing into the dresser. The room was a blur of flying objects.Books, clothes, whatever I could get my hands on. I tore at the sheets on my bed, ripping them to shreds, needing to destroy, to obliterate any trace of what once was.But it still wasn’t enough. I needed out. I needed to escape the suffocating reality of Lea’s betrayal.
My car keys glinted on the floor amidst the wreckage. I grabbed them, stumbling out of the room, my vision hazy with fury and booze.
I don’t remember getting in the car, don’t remember the streets or the lights. I only remember the roar of the engine and the scream of my own thoughts.
"How could you, Lea? How could you betray me like this?"
The docks loomed ahead, the smell of salt and diesel filling the air. I slammed the brakes, the car skidding to a halt.I stumbled out, the cool night air hitting me like a slap. The world swayed, but I didn’t care. I needed to get away, to find some semblance of peace in the chaos that had become my life.
"Jake, you stupid fool," I muttered to myself, my voice shaking. "How did you let this happen? How did you not see it?"I staggered toward the edge of the dock, the dark water below calling to me. The whiskey buzzed in my veins, making my thoughts sluggish and wild. I kicked at a loose piece of wood, sending it spiraling into the water below.
"Lea, what did I do wrong?" I yelled into the night, my voice breaking. "What did he give you that I couldn’t?"The silence was deafening, the only answer was the lapping of the waves against the dock.
" Everything that I ever did in my life was because of you. But you..." I sank to my knees, the weight of my grief and anger too much to bear. The tears came then, hot and bitter, mingling with the taste of whiskey on my lips.
"I love you, Lea," I whispered, my voice hoarse. "I would have given you everything.". I looked up at the stars, the cold, indifferent stars, and screamed.
"Phill, you bastard! You think you’ve won? You think you can just take her from me?"I stood up, swaying, and stared at my reflection in the dark water. Who was this broken man staring back at me? I didn’t recognize him. I didn’t want to.
I barely noticed the figure emerging from the darkness until he was right in front of me. A wiry guy with a leather jacket and a crooked grin. He looked like trouble, and I was all for it.
“Hey, man,” he said, his voice low and smooth. “You look like you could use a little pick-me-up.”I squinted at him, my mind foggy. “What’re you selling?”
He chuckled, pulling a small baggie from his pocket. “Whatever you need, brother. Just a little something to take the edge off.”
My anger and despair mixed with the whiskey buzz was making the idea more appealing than it should’ve been.I had made a promise to Lea to steer clear of this stuff. But no promise mattered anymore. They were all gone. “How much?”He named a price, and I fumbled for my wallet. My hands were shaking as I handed over the cash, not fully comprehending what I was doing. He handed me the bag.
“Enjoy,” he said, melting back into the shadows.I stumbled to the edge of the dock, the bag clutched in my hand. I didn’t think, didn’t care. I just needed to escape, needed to forget. With clumsy fingers, I opened the bag and took a hit. The effect was immediate and overwhelming. The world spun, and I felt a rush of numbness, a blissful void where my pain had been.But it didn’t last. The high quickly turned into a nightmarish haze. The ground seemed to tilt beneath me, and I could barely stand. Panic clawed at my mind, but I was too far gone to fight it.
“Jake!” A voice cut through the fog, sharp and urgent. “Jake, what the hell are you doing?”I turned, swaying, and saw Rosa. She looked furious, her eyes blazing as she stormed towards me.
“Get away from him!” she shouted at the shadows. The dealer stepped forward, his grin fading.
“Hey, lady, chill. He’s just having a good time.”
Rosa’s glared. “If you don’t get lost right now, you’ll regret it.”
The guy hesitated, but something in Rosa’s expression made him back off. He muttered something under his breath and slunk away, disappearing into the night.Rosa turned to me, her anger turning to concern. “Jake, what the hell were you thinking?”
I tried to speak, but my words came out slurred and incoherent. “Lea… Phill… couldn’t take it…”
“Damn it, Jake,” she muttered, grabbing my arm. “Come on, we’re getting out of here.”She practically dragged me to her car, my legs barely functioning.
I collapsed into the passenger seat, the world spinning around me. Rosa got behind the wheel.
“You’re a mess, Jake,” she said, starting the engine. “What were you trying to do? Destroy yourself?”I didn’t have an answer. I just stared at her, my mind a jumble of confusion and regret. The drugs were still coursing through my system, making everything seem surreal and distant.