EMILY
Seth was at my doorstep looking like he'd gone to hell and back. A small part of my heart squeezed in sympathy, but a larger part of me was still so freakin mad at him for doing what he had done. I didn't know if I could ever trust anyone after this.
"I came to collect my stuff." He said finally.
I reached for the key holder, fished out the keys to the studio and handed it to him. Once that was done, I started closing the door when he wedged his foot in the doorway, blocking it.
"Can you please stop doing that? I haven't got all day to stand here."
Honestly, I had nothing better to do other than to watch Netflix, eat ice-cream and cry for hours. But I wasn't about to tell that to Seth. He needed to know that I was paving my way to the land of 'I've-Moved-On.'
He didn't seem to take a hint or simply didn't care.
"All I need is a few minutes of your time so that I can explain myself." He repeated the same thing from what he'd said at the cafeteria.
"I don't want to listen to your excuses. Please leave!"
This time when I shut the door, he didn't protest.
"I'll just sit here then until you open the door. I'm not leaving this spot." He called out.
I went back to the living area and resumed watching the show. The ice cream had melted a bit, all thanks to the Jock boy.
He'a going to get bored eventually and then leave so I wouldn't have to listen to the bullshit spewing out of that attractive mouth.
I think I must have dozed off and I only woke up because of the loud sound of the rain splattering on the window outside. The room was dark, and the tv screen had the list of movies that I could watch next. I switched off the tv, and climbed to my feet.
After splashing some water on my face, I went to pull the drapes when I saw a dark figure huddled in the doorway.
What the hell? It had been almost five hours since I'd zonked out due to lack of sleep last night. Was he sitting here since afternoon?
I opened the door slowly and he turned around to look at me, so freakin happy that I'd opened the door, you'd think I'd put his name in my will.
I also couldn't help but compare him to a retriever puppy.
As much as I hated him in that moment, I was also not a monster who would let him get sick in the rain. Since he'd been sitting on the porch step, he'd gotten only partly wet.
"Come inside." I invited him, begrudgingly.
He walked inside the house and I handed him a clean towel from the cabinet in the foyer.
“I won’t tell your mother or anyone about this. You don’t need to worry about me screwing up your plans for playing college hockey.”
“That’s not the reason I’m here.”
“How long were you sitting there?" I asked, I was eye level when he was two steps below and since he stepped towards the door, I had to crane my neck to look at him.
I’d gotten so used to having him around that I almost forgot that he was a giant.
“A few hours.” He indicated towards his wet shirt that was now sticking to his body like second skin and highlighting those delicious abs. “I have some spare t-shirts in the studio. I'll go get changed and be right back.”
I prepared some tea until he returned sometime later, his hair was blow-dried, but the tips were still wet. He stood in the kitchen awkwardly watching me work around.
“I’ll prepare dinner.” He offered.
Sometimes it just slipped out of my mind that the only reason Seth was even in this house was because he was the ‘house help.’ I never treated him like he was house staff, or paid any attention to the taboo aspect of our relationship. Stuff happened, and I fell in love with him, quite deeply. No matter how many times I would tell myself that I wasn’t going to be fooled, that’s exactly what happened right now. He played me so well.
“There’s no need. You’re not working here anymore, remember?” I pushed a cup of tea towards him and noticed a black box on the counter top. “What’s in that?”
“The skates you gifted me. I’m returning those since I don’t have the borrowed money to return to you.”
“And what do I do with them? It’s not like I can suddenly fit into a size ten-point-five or suddenly do ice-skating. If you don’t want them, you can just throw them away, or better yet, sell them off. You’ll get an extra thousand dollars for it.”
It was a low blow but I guess he had it coming.
Also, I didn’t want his skates back and neither was I going to give the necklace he’d given me on my birthday. It had our names engraved on a heart. Look at me, acting all tough but having a hard time parting with a gift that meant something to me. I was pathetic.
He looked wounded, “I’ll keep them.”
There was silence between us except for the rain pelting against the windows outside. Chanel climbed on the counter and brushed against Seth, telling him to pet her. When he stroked her gently, she purred and demanded belly rubs.
Traitor Chanel. She’d gotten too attached to him.
“You need to understand something, Seth. You’ve hurt me like no one else ever has! I wasn’t even this humiliated when Roland made fun of me because I’m fat. He does not matter to me, but you did!”
“I know that and I’m so sorry…”
“Sorry isn’t going to change the fact that you made a bet with your teammates to sleep with me!”
“Tell me how I can make this okay!” he reached out to touch me.
I pulled my hand away, “Don’t touch me!”
He raised his hands in surrender like he wasn’t going to touch me anymore. It took everything inside me to stop from slapping him or screaming at him.
“I’m sorry for everything, but I also didn’t know about it until that day. I had no fucking clue about the stupid bet since I didn’t remember it. I confessed to you because I knew hiding it wasn’t right.”
“Wrong! You confessed because you were scared that Roland or Shane would tell me about it first. You had your reasons.”
He sighed like he wasn’t in a mood to argue.
“I love you.” He said.
I gaped at him, I had to pick up my jaw from the floor.
“I’ve loved you since the first time we met, Emily.”
My heart beat sped up. These butterflies went crazy but there was also the insecure part of me saying that he was lying.
“I don’t know if I believe you. Maybe this is your calculated effort to keep me in your bed.”
He looked visibly disgusted, “If it’s only about sex, don’t you think I’d find someone else pretty easily?”
Now he looked downright pissed. “Look, I know what you’re thinking but I’m not lying to you. I love you and I’m going to keep loving you. You can’t tell me not to. It’s beyond my control.”
“Don’t expect me to say yes or scream from the roof tops because your timing is really bad. I don’t know what to think. I don’t know if you’re still playing some jock games with your buddies. I need time to clear my head!”
He nodded, “Sure. I’m not pushing you for an answer but that does not mean you can use that time to go on a date with Ian fucking Palmer. You can clear your head without doing that.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “Just so it wasn’t clear the first time, Seth, we’re not dating so I can see whoever I want.”
“We’re not not dating, just so it wasn’t clear.” He stood up, his biceps flexing as he dug his hands in his pockets and stepped into my space.
“You can’t tell me what to do!” I yelled at him, giving his hard chest a push.
In turn, he put his arms around my waist and pulled me closer, “I’m madly in love with you, Emily. It might sound like an exaggeration, but it’s like I can’t fucking breathe if I’m not close to you.” He picked up my hand and kissed it like it was the most precious thing, those emerald eyes were shinning with remorse, “Please give me another chance. Promise I won’t break your heart.”
Tears threatened to blur my vision, “I don’t know!”
He let go off me reluctantly, and stepped back looking disappointed, “let’s take a bit of a break, okay? I’ll be around if you need me.” He placed a piece of paper on the table, “That’s my new address if you want to stop by, talk or hang out.”
It was a tempting offer to see where he lived now but I wasn’t going to take the bait.
If he loved me, why hadn’t he said anything before? Why just now?
“Bye Emily.” I heard him pick up his bag and the sound of the footsteps retreating.
As if the universe was against him leaving, the power went out pulling the entire house into pitch black darkness.
It was a big ass house and I was alone save for Chanel who was a total wuss. There were too many stories of random break-ins in the neighborhood, one such story about a girl who was killed in her bed and robbed for freakin fifty bucks.
I had shudders running down my body.
I turned on the torch on my phone and walked outside to the studio where Seth was still packing some of his things. He’d loaded almost everything into his truck and after the last carton, he’d be on his way.
He turned when he heard the sound of me in the doorway. “Hey. Do you need something?”
“I…I was wondering if you could maybe stay for a little while. There’s a power cut.” I said meekly as if he didn’t know that already. “And I heard someone was murdered in the house a block down from here. I wouldn’t have asked you to stay if it wasn’t for the killer on loose.” I blabbered on.
I saw a hint of a smile, “Sure. I’ll check the fuse box.”
He came inside the house, checked the fuse box, fixed what was wrong and stayed with me for an hour. I thought he might push me to give him an answer but he did none of that.
When the rain stopped, I told him, “It’s okay, you can leave now. Sorry for making you wait.”
“No problem.” He said, “You’re gonna be okay alone?”
“I won’t be alone. I’ll just call Indie.”
He frowned, “For what?”
“He’ll stay the night.”
The frown only deepened, “Nah, don’t trouble him. I’ll stay with you until morning.”
“I’m texting him right now. You can go home.”
“I told you I’ll stay. There’s a guest bedroom upstairs, right? I’ll sleep there or on the couch here if you want. Don’t disturb the eBoy.”
“What did you just call him?”
He turned around to face me, “A pretty eBoy, the type who posts Tiktok videos to get attention. That’s what they are called these days.”
“That’s awfully perceptive of you, given the fact that you are a cliché jock, the ones they stereotype in the movies for being muscular and dumb.”
He chuckled, “Nice try. You can insult me as much as you want but he’s not spending the night in this house alone with you.”
“Fine, stay in the guest bedroom.”
It infuriated me to think he was trying to keep the boyfriend rights even though they were revoked last night.
Since he was already in the house and we hadn’t eaten dinner, he offered to cook so I let him. He made my favorite pasta and I knew it was his way of trying to get me to forgive him and as much as the food was delicious, he was sadly mistaken if he thought I was going to bestow him with compliments.
He helped me lock all the doors and windows, check the security cameras one last time before going to bed.
I’d probably slept for an hour when I heard a loud cracking of thunder. There was a rainstorm and if that wasn’t enough, there was a power cut again.
I lay there in the dark looking at the shadows from the streets until I was freaked out enough to not care about my pride. I pulled on the silk robe and walked down the passageway to the guest bedroom.
I knocked once before opening the door.
I saw his large silhouette sleeping on the bed. I slipped in behind him and pulled the covers over me.
He stiffened and then slowly turned around to face me.
“I heard the thunder, and then I saw some shadows and I…”
He put a powerful arm around my waist, and in a sultry voice he said, “Shhh…I got you, everything’s okay. I’m here. I’ll kill anyone who tries to hurt you.” He picked a loose strand of hair from my cheek and played with it while his other hand remained on my waist.
“I’m sorry for calling you dumb earlier. You’re not dumb.”
I saw a shadow of a smile as he whispered, “I deserved that.”
He stroked my hair gently, lovingly and like a hungry, pathetic girl I let him because it was dark and I liked the warmth his body provided. He leaned in and touched his lips with mine, it was like he was testing the waters. I put my fingers at the nape of his neck and guided him closer, he took that as an encouragement to deepen the kiss, his tongue melted with mine as our legs entwined.
I moaned, opening my mouth giving him further access, the sensual pull of his tongue on mine and the maddening frenzy of our kiss was like a drug that I couldn’t get enough of. Maybe he was still manipulating me with his expert mouth and I was being a stupid girl again falling for his trap.
He kissed a trail from my jaw to my collarbone. “Emily,” he whispered.
“Hmm…”
He cupped my face and even in the darkness, I could see the seriousness in those sad eyes. “If you ever get married to some country club, and if you become his trophy wife,” his voice wavered, “You remember me, baby, okay?”
“Seth…” I warned him.
“You remember that I loved you first and that I loved you more than anyone else. Don’t you ever forget me.”