SETH
I guess I could tell Emily the truth, but leave out the important details. She wanted to know about my past, and I knew that she only meant to do that because she was genuinely curious to get to know me, but there was no way I was going to talk about the shit-storm that I left behind in Connecticut. That was a can of worms that I would never open.
Moving to Bountyville to live with my mother was meant as a fresh start, and talking about that now just beat the purpose of what I’d initially started out to do.
“You told me your dad lives in Connecticut. What does he do there?”
“He owns a farm and a small departmental store. I used to help him with both.” I shrugged, “Like I said, nothing special.” I couldn’t meet her eyes, not with the stuff that I was hiding.
When I dared a glance towards her, she had a smile on her face as she sipped on her coke. “Did your father remarry?”
“Nope.” I laughed, “He was still hung up on the idea that my mom would go back to him, I’m pretty sure he still is and I don’t think that’s ever going to happen.”
“Can I ask why they got divorced?” she asked, “I’m sorry for asking you so many questions. You can tell me to mind my own business.” She laughed.
“He cheated on her. Twice. She caught him with another woman when she came home early from work and that was the last straw.” I explained, “Dad and I aren’t exactly on great terms but we managed to be decent to each other. Mom needed me here, and I was dying for a change so I decided to pack and move out of there.”
She put her hand on mine, “I’m glad you decided to move here. I wouldn’t have met you if you hadn’t.”
“True that.” I chuckled and noticed her smile get wider. “What are you smiling for?”
Amused, she said, “I’m imagining you working at a departmental store, and a ton of girls lining up outside to buy stuff that they don’t even need.”
I laughed, almost spurting out the coke. “Well, the business used to be good when I worked there, my dad says that too. Girls visited just so they could talk to me and I would always convince them to buy something.”
“Hmmm...you bet I would have been one of those girls. I would have emptied your store by now, driving up there three or four times a day.”
“Yeah. You could afford to buy the entire store just to flirt with me.”
“You know, your mom invited me to visit your house for Christmas two years ago and I couldn’t go because she told me later on that she had a change of plans. Think if I took up on her invitation, I would have met you a long time ago.”
I stayed silent. This is where I would let the shame take over me.
I sighed, “She asked me if it was okay if she brought a kid along for the holidays, it was you obviously. I assumed you were a snobbish girl who would...” my throat closed up, “I thought you would look down on us so I told mom not to bring you. She got mad and didn’t visit us that year.”
“Oh.” The smile vanished from her lips, “It’s okay. You didn’t know me at that time."
The silence continued to hover between us.
I had been furious with my mom that year. The reason she hadn’t visited us for Christmas was because I told her not to. I’d been jealous of the kid that she was spending so much time with, that she was practically living with. I hadn’t known Emily then. I guess you could say, I was envious that she was taking care of a kid that wasn’t me even though she was my mother. I’d been bitter, angry, going through a phase, and took out the anger on the phone.
I recalled how I spoke to her a few days before Christmas.
“You’re getting paid to be their housekeeper, Mom! It’s not your job to look after the kid on your holidays too! I miss you...I thought we were supposed to spend Christmas together!”
“But honey, Em will be alone at home. Her father is always away on business trips and that’s why I’m asking if it’s okay if I bring her along. She's almost the same age as you and--"
“No you can’t and besides she’s not going to like it here. I don’t want to deal with some rich snobby brat on my holiday. You promised you would spend it with me!”
“I know honey, but I would like her to accompany me. She’s lonely, the poor child. She needs me, Seth.”
“I need you too! Have you ever thought of that? You ever asked what I’m going through?”
“Sweetie, don’t do this! You know how much I love you...it’s just that Em...”
“You’re my mother!” I’d shrieked into the phone. “If you care so much about this kid then it’s best you don’t come here at all. You can celebrate Christmas with your new fake daughter.”
I’d regretted saying those words as soon as they were out. Mom had been angry so she visited on Christmas alone, gave me the present and then drove for miles to live with her parents. I’d just turned sixteen at the time. I hated the world, and my father mostly.
Things had gone to shit after that and I would say that was the turning point in my life.
I wondered if things would have been different if I hadn’t been such a major douchebag back then.
After we finished dinner, I loaded the plates into the dishwasher and cleaned the mess she had created earlier on the counter. Having done that, I decided to get some studying done. Mostly, my mind had clouded with the dark thoughts and regrets of my past.
“Hey, um...I’ll be in my room if you need me. Thank you so much for dinner.” I turned to leave.
“Wait.” She called out to me. “How about we study together and then you can just sleep with me in my bedroom?”
That sounded tempting as hell.
* * *
EMILY
Asking that question had been a mistake. Couldn’t I keep my mouth shut for once? Where did all the boldness come from? I was a wanton for Seth’s attentions. It’s like he made me feel desirable, and I was chasing after that feeling.
While he said we were cool, the events of last night, with me calling him out as a player had caused a tiny bit of rift between the easy friendship we had. I could feel the tension between us, and I thought with us going to bed together would make things better.
Seth could deny it, but I know it was there.
“I would have loved to, Emily, but...” he gave me an apologetic look, “We discussed this before. I don’t want to be caught in your bedroom and cause trouble for my mom. I hope you understand that.”
Disappointment settled inside my gut, but I still managed to nod, “Of course. That was stupid of me to ask.”
He chuckled, “Nah, baby. It’s cool.”
He called me “baby” which meant we were fine.
He leaned in and gave me a chaste kiss on my lips, “Good night, Emily.”
“G’Night, Seth.”
* * *
An hour later, I had already undressed for bed when I noticed the light in the studio apartment was still switched on.
Seth was right. If he slept in my room, we could get caught.
I usually slept in a thin camisole mostly because I lived alone. But with Seth around the house, it changed a lot of things.
Maybe I should be wearing something more decent. Cale would have been displeased about my lack of clothing with another boy living in the house.
Did he even know Seth was living here?
I saw from my bedroom window when Seth took off his shirt. The room was dim, thanks to the few lava lamps lighting up the place.
I had a perfect view of his abs.
All of a sudden, he turned towards the window and I backed away in time.
Stalking is illegal, Emily! Close the damn curtains.
I listened to my head even though it was getting muddled with some unwanted dirty thoughts, and I pulled the curtains.
And then as if on auto-pilot, I brushed my teeth, flossed, and sprayed a little bit of that perfume that Seth seemed to like. He hadn’t admitted it, but I’d just picked on things.
I pulled out a long robe from my closet and put it on.
Don’t do this, Emily!
A voice kept repeating in my head but I ignored it.
Before I had any second thoughts, I’d already slipped on my slippers and was already out of the door, briskly walking across the lawn towards the studio.
My heart was in my throat when I knocked on the door.
“Door’s open. Come inside.” I heard his voice calling from inside.
Last chance to run!
I pushed the door open and walked inside the little studio apartment.
Seth was sitting at the study table working on his homework, shirtless. His tattoos on display. He looked up when he saw me walk inside, and quickly looked away but didn’t stop writing.
“What’s wrong, Emily-Mae?” He asked me, without taking his eyes off his desk. “You come here looking for trouble?” His sultry voice dripped sarcasm.
Technically he was a replacement housekeeper.
But to me...
He was just Seth. The boy I was falling for.
I untangled the knot on the robe and let it slide. Now I stood in front of him in only my chemise. Feeling daring, I peeled that off, too, standing in only my lacy bra and panties.
That sure had his attention.
He swirled in the chair slowly to face me. His hand was shaking as I watched him fight for control. His eyes raked over my half-naked body.
In a soft voice, he commanded, “Shut that door.”