Methis POV
I woke up the next morning, a pounding headache threatening to split my forehead into two and tossed it in the bed next to me.
Again, typical. The practice of waking up with another problem bothering me had almost become routine so I wasn't really surprised.
Nevertheless, I dragged myself out of bed and prepared for school. Irrespective of my feelings, life had to go on right?
The first few classes were boring as hell, and I was extremely uninterested, which made the ring of the bell for lunch break a very welcome development.
I walked into the cafeteria and almost immediately, my eyes fell on her. Sophia, sat alone at a table, picking her food, a bored look in her eyes.
It made me feel like shit, she was alone because of me. I was her best friend, we did everything together including lunch and now we were fighting she had to suffer the discomfort of sitting in the cafeteria and eating alone, with nobody to talk to.
I had to fix that.
Taking a deep breath, I grabbed my tray, paid for food I really didn't want and walked up to her. She didn't even bother to look up at me until I was right behind her.
"Is this seat taking?" I asked, flashing my best smile.
She looked up, her eyebrows shooting up like she was surprised to see me.
"Methis?"
I chuckled nervously, "Life and in person."
"Oh."
"May I join you?"
She paused for a moment, then shrugged, pushing her tray aside, "Knock yourself out."
Okay, that was off to a rough start but I guess it could be fixed, at least she was still talking to me.
"How have you been?" I asked, sitting across from her.
"So and so, it hasn't been too bad."
"Oh, that's great."
"Yeah."
I took a deep breath, this conversation was going to be long, "Sophia, I'm sorry. I didn't know he was going to show up like that."
She pursed her lips, "How did he even know where we were? Did you tell him?"
"No, of course not. He must have followed me or something. He's been trying to get back with me for a while, but I told him it's over."
"Well, he didn't seem to get the message." She scoffed, rolling her eyes, "He just barged in and started a scene."
"I know, I know." I sighed, leaning back, "He's a jerk. But he's also hurting. He loved me, you know."
"Loved you? From what I can tell he abused you, Methis, he manipulated you. He doesn't deserve your sympathy."
I paused, unsure of what to say. There was no way to break this to her without saying more than I was willing to reveal.
"Well?" She pressed, staring at me, "Am I wrong Methis?"
"He wasn't always like that." I said, reaching out to touch her hand on the table, and to my pleasant surprise, she didn't immediately make me jerk away, "He had his good moments. He was charming, funny, smart. He made me feel special."
"He made you feel special by isolating you from your friends and family." She scoffed, narrowing her eyes at me, "He made you feel special by making you dependent on him. He made you feel special by tearing you down."
"That's not true." I said quickly, "He cared about me. He just had some issues. He needed help."
She looked at me like I was crazy, "Help? He needed a restraining order. And you needed to get away from him. That's why I was so happy when you got along with Xander. He's a good guy. He treats you right. He respects you."
"Xander is a good guy. I like him a lot. But he's not Jamal. He doesn't make me feel the same way."
"What way?" She pressed, "Scared? Insecure? Miserable?"
"No." I countered, "Alive. Passionate. Excited."
"Methis, that's not love. That's addiction. You're addicted to the drama, the intensity, the highs and lows. You're addicted to Jamal."
I shook my head, "No, I'm not. I'm over him. I just... I don't know. I still have feelings for him."
"You don't want to feel safe?"
"Safe is not enough, Sophia..."
She shook her head, looking away, "Here we go again."
I didn't care, I pressed on, "Enough for what? For you? For Xander? For society? What about me? What about what I want?"
"What do you want, Methis?" She snapped, grabbing my hands and gritting her teeth in frustration, "Do you want to go back to Jamal? Do you want to go back to the abuse, the lies, the pain?"
"No. No, I don't. But I don't want to lose him either. He's a part of me. He's a part of my life."
"He's a part of your past, Methis." She squeezed my hands hard, her eyes pleading with me, "A past that you need to leave behind. A past that you need to move on from."
I paused, looking at her, unsure of what to say. We were both silent as she waited for my reply. I took a deep breath, "I can't, Sophia. I can't just forget him. I can't just erase him. I can't just let him go."
"You have to, Methis. You have to. For your own sake. For Xander's sake. For my sake."
I looked at her, frowning, "For your sake? What do you mean?"
"I mean, he hurt my brother, Methis. He hurt Xander. He punched him, he kicked him, he threw him to the ground. He could have killed him."
I saw it now, all this was about, was why she wanted Jamal gone so quickly. It had little to do with me, but it had a lot to do with Xander. Hurting her brother was a crime she would never forgive. That made things, complicated, "He didn't mean to, Sophia. He was angry. He was jealous. He was out of control."
Anger flashed dangerously in her eyes, "He was out of line, Methis. He had no right to do that. He had no right to touch him."
"He was not, Sophia. He was not. You don't understand. You don't know him. You don't know us."
"I know enough, Methis. I know enough to see that he's bad for you. I know enough to see that he's dangerous. I know enough to see that he's evil."
"He's not evil, Sophia." I said quietly.
"He is a fucking monster."
I jerked my hand away from her, feeling frustration rise in me, "Stop it, Sophia. Stop it. You don't know what you're talking about. You don't know anything."
"I know more than you, Methis." She said calmly, her blue eyes staring into mine, unblinking. A few heads were starting to turn at our direction now, I was causing another scene, but I didn't care. And apparently, neither did Sophia, because she continued, her voice cold and steely, "I know more than you. You're blind. You're naive. You're stupid."
The frustration turned into anger, "How dare you, Sophia? How dare you? You're my friend. You're supposed to support me. You're supposed to help me."
"I am your friend, Methis. I am. That's why I'm telling you the truth. That's why I'm trying to save you."
"Save me?" I snapped, leaning back, away from her, "Save me from what? From who? From Jamal? From myself?"
"Yes, Methis. Yes. From Jamal. From yourself. From this madness."
"Madness? Madness is what you're talking, Sophia. Madness is what you're doing. Madness is what you're asking, THIS is madness."
"I'm not asking, Methis. I'm telling. I'm telling you to choose. I'm telling you to decide. I'm telling you to pick a side."
I furrowed my eyebrows, "Pick a side? What do you mean?"
She folded her hands, "I mean, it's either him or us, Methis. It's either him or us. You can't have both. You can't have it all."
My heart rate went up a few beats per minute as I felt blood rush into my head, surely she wasn't... "What? What are you saying?"
"I'm saying, if you want to be with Jamal, then you can't be with me. You can't be my friend. You can't be in my life."
All the anger dissipated almost instantly, replaced by sheer panic, this wasn't what I came here for. I came to fix a friendship not destroy it beyond repair, "You can't do that, Sophia. You can't do that."
She shook her head, "I can, Methis, and I will. Because I can't take it anymore. I can't take the drama, I can't take the pain. It's all too much from one person."
"Sophia, please. Please don't do this. Please don't say this. Please don't leave me."
"I wouldn't need to, all you have to do is give the word."
I bit my lips, remaining silent, I wasn't prepared for any of this.
She nodded, "I see. Goodbye, Methis, have a great life."
And just like that, she stood up and walked out.
Out of the cafeteria, and out of my life. I put my head on the table and did the only thing I could, I sobbed my head off.