Elona’s POV
Thunder made me jump as I scrolled through my phone, looking through the website of VFS. I was sitting comfortably on the sofa. Rain began to pour, and I just wanted to get into bed with this kind of weather. My heart wasn’t on Tristan this evening. I was preparing myself for VFS because I have to go to them and start my career. I do feel nervous, but I think I will be able to do this. I shouldn’t doubt myself.
“I’m leaving now,” Spooky walked into the lounge, pulling his black jacket collar up, preparing himself for the rain.
“Are you at least going to take a cab in this storm?” I asked. He was going to join someone for a night out who works with him in photography.
“I’m taking a cab, don’t worry,” he gave me a reassuring smile.
“Good to know. And be safe on the road.”
“I will be safe, and I will see you later,” he smiled before he walked out the front door.
Letting out a sigh, I went back to searching the website, curling up on the sofa as the rain pelted the windows as thunder cracked overhead ,and lightning flashed.
After a while, the rain and thunder stopped. I stood up from the sofa, ready to get into bed, but a knock on the door stopped me in my tracks. I turned to face the door, furrowing my brows. Spooky has his own key, so he wouldn’t knock. Could it be Cris or my Dad? I placed my phone on the coffee table and walked towards the front door, and peeped through the peephole. I pulled back and then opened the door.
Tristan stood there. He looked defeated as his eyes were filled with tears. His eyes never left mine. “Are you okay? Is it Cris?” I asked, starting to worry at the way he looked.
He sucked in a shaky breath, “You lost it,” he said, which was barely a whisper. “Our baby,” he whispered this time.
My heart raced as I didn’t know where he got this information. It must’ve been my Dad that told him. “H-how...”
“Can I come inside?” he asked. I watched as his Adam’s apple moved as he swallowed.
“O-Of course,” I snapped out of it and stepped out the way, because I didn’t want him to be standing in the rain again because it would soon storm again.
He entered, brushing past me, but I could feel those sparks that were still so alive, and I closed the door behind him, turning to face him. I gestured to the sofa for him to take a seat, and he sat down, leaning forward with his elbows resting on his knees, his hands clasped together, fidgeting as he looked at the coffee table in front of him.
I took a seat on the recliner across from him, the coffee table was separating the two of us. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked as he looked up at me. His pain was raw, and it broke my heart as the tears burned the back of my eyes.
“I didn’t think you needed to know because you had already left me. I only found out after the break-up and my Dad was the one to inform me. He put two and two together that the baby was yours,” I swallowed as I fidgeted with my hands in my lap.
He nodded, “I’m sorry that you had to go through it alone. It’s not something you had to go through all by yourself,” his eyes glazed over with fresh tears. “When I found out by my friend, who I haven’t seen in years told me that he’s your doctor...he never knew that you didn’t tell me about the baby, and he assumed I knew. Gosh, Elona, this hurts....loss hurts,” tears streamed down his face as he shook his head. Seeing him so hurt and vulnerable made me feel sorry for him because this was not his first loss. I wish he didn’t have to find out this way, but at least he knows now.
“I’m sorry that it’s another loss for you,” I said.
“That’s what’s making it very hard for me to soak in...my heart is ripped out, Elona. I-I don’t know how to deal with this because I’ve tried to get through the first losses in my life, and this is something I don’t know how to work through. The cherry on top is the fact that you went through it alone, and I wasn’t there to be with you and support you in any way,” he leaned back as he wiped the tears from his eyes. I just watched him, letting him talk as my own pain was rising again.
“It wasn’t easy ,but I managed. I do recall when I was drunk one time and passed out. You got me on the bathroom floor, and I told you that we had lost a baby.”
“And I thought you were dreaming,” he shook his head. “I should’ve known, but I was sure you were on birth control, not missing anything besides the days leading up to your surgery. The day you lost our baby...my birthday,” he swallowed.
“I’m sorry.”
“Never apologize for what we lost,” he looked at me with sadness and vulnerability.
“I just...everytime I would look at you... I’m reminded about the loss,” tears began to stream down my face. “I couldn’t look at you.”
“It makes sense now,” he stood up and sat on top of the coffee table in front of me, taking my hands into his. “I’m here now, and I’m not going anywhere, no matter how painful this is.”
He reached out to cup the sides of my face and wiped the tears away with his thumbs. “I didn’t know I was pregnant until my Dad told me,” I said.
“I wish things were different. I wish I never screwed up,” he held my hand again, “Can you promise me one thing?” he asked as tears ran down his face, making me want to cry even more. I nodded. “Please, do not celebrate my birthday again.”
That was a punch to the gut because it was double pain and a reminder for him. “Okay.”
“I can’t celebrate-” he shook his head, trying to compose himself. “I can’t celebrate knowing that on my birthday we lost it,” he let go of my hand and wiped his tears away with the back of his hands. I wiped away mine as I watched him. “I’m sorry.”
I just nodded. I couldn’t even speak because if I spoke, the lump in my throat would make me break down and cry again. I’m trying my best to hold it together as I looked anywhere else but at him, my lips trembled. I heard him inhale shakily. “I guess I should go.”
He stood up ,and so did I. We were so close that he held my gaze. Pure pain and sadness that broke me for him. I tried my best to hold it together, I would probably break down after he leaves. I sucked in a breath, and before I knew it, he wrapped his arms around me and tears streamed down my face, soaking his t-shirt. I felt him shake with his own tears, crying with me... going through this together as rain and thunder started again. I pulled away from him as I wiped my tears away. I looked at this broken man in front of me. I simply didn’t want to go through this evening being all by myself and alone.
“Please, stay the night.”