Kacie
I’m flustered. I don’t know what I was thinking. I shake my head and he closes the door behind him. Jake closes the distance and grabs the firewood before heading to the fireplace. Viktor’s eyes travel after him before turning to search my face.
“Don’t stop on my account,” he starts, “I heard a bit of it from the other side of the door. Please, continue.”
The room goes quiet and I look away from Viktor’s gaze, avoiding his gaze as my feelings hit me one after the other like a tornado going and returning.
I’m confused.
I’m hurt.
I’m jealous.
Is a kiss cheating?
Even if it is it’s nothing compared to what I did.
Is it cheating if they kept it from me?
And there go all of my emotions again. My mind is filled with images of them together before me, without me. Kissing, spending their days together, working together, traveling to other packs together. Fucking. Fucking? My breathing becomes heavy and I don’t know what to think.
I’m angry.
I’m hurt.
I’m scared.
“Were you ever going to tell me?” I whirl on him angrily.
I want to yell.
I want to scream.
I want to hit him.
I want…
Viktor’s gaze searches my face for a second. “Why didn’t I tell you that I’ve been with my best friend? Why didn’t I tell you that I’ve tasted the Beta? Why didn’t I tell you that before there was you, there were others? You knew I’d been with people before you. I didn’t know I had to give you a list.” He walks over to the counter and pulls a bottle out. He grabs a shot glass from the bag. He pours himself a drink. Turning around he looks at me before he throws his head back and swallows it down.
I don’t know what I expected him to say but it wasn’t that. I expected him to avoid my gaze. I expected shame. I expected an answer. But his face isn’t filled with shame. He holds my gaze and I feel the anger radiating off of him. This was before me and I have the audacity to be angry after what I’ve done to him while with him. I want him. My gaze darts to Jake, and I want him, too.
“That’s not fair. I wasn’t asking for a list of names but you could have told me,” I said.
“What do you want, Kacie? Why don’t you tell us what you want? Tell me what you want, who you want,” Viktor says. He turns around and grabs two other shot glasses out. He fills all three. I wait for him to turn around.
“You. Him. Us. I want this to make sense. I want us to make sense. I want you to tell me about him. Do you love him?” I asked.
“It’s… it’s in the past,” Viktor said. I could see Jake visibly flinch in the background but he schooled his features. “I love you, Kacie. I’m so in love with you. I don’t want you to think we were forced together by the Goddess,” Viktor says. “Jake… we had something and he was there for me. He’s my best friend,” Viktor chokes. “I didn’t want to lose him but when I walked in on you two… I broke, Kacie. I didn’t know who I should be angrier with.”
Jake strides over to the counter and stops a foot away from my mate. Viktor grabs a shot and hands it to him. Jake holds Viktor’s gaze as he takes it. My feet move until I’m next to them. Viktor’s eyes slide over to me and I watch him as he picks up the last glass. I take it from him and lift it to my lips. I drink it and close my eyes as it burns on the way down. When I open my eyes, they’re both staring at me.
“What happens now?” I ask.
Jake doesn’t say anything but his eyes flicker back and forth between me and my mate. Viktor swallows.
“Where do you want this to go?” He asked.
“I asked first,” I said.
“I don’t know. My heart hurts, my chest feels heavy but I know I can’t let you go. I want to kill him but I know I couldn’t,” Viktor says.
“Do you think of me differently now that you know about my past with Jake?” Viktor asked.
“I-I don’t know,” I said.
“I know you are angry,” Viktor murmured. I could feel their proximity and the warmth from the shot started to spread through my body. He lifted the bottle to my glass and did the same for Jake. “Is that all you’re feeling? Just anger?”
“Yes, I’m angry but,” I cast a look at Jake, “but I’m also jealous.”
“Did it turn you on?” He asked.
I gulp and look at Jake again.
“Look at me,” he orders and I obey. “Did it turn you on?” He repeated.
“Yes,” I breathed.
“What do you think of that Jake?” Viktor asked.
“I don’t know, Alpha,” he says, his voice husky and low.
“I don’t know what’s going to happen from here on out. I do know what the three of us have in common. Jealousy.”
My chest rises and falls but this time it isn’t with anger. Something dark and delicious fills my chest and makes my cheeks warm. Lust.
“Kacie’s jealous. I’m jealous. Aren’t you jealous?” Viktor asked as he turned to Jake.
Jake looks at him before his eyes find mine behind Viktor. He swallows and clenches his jaw and looks at Viktor.
“Yes,” Jake says. His gaze is firm but his voice comes out breathy and I know he’s affected too.
Viktor’s eyes glaze over and Jake’s glaze a moment later. When their eyes clear, Viktor has a smirk on his face. Jake takes a step towards me and Viktor leans back against the counter. Jake falls to his feet in front of me and I stare down at him before turning to look at my mate. My mate isn’t looking at me though, he’s looking at Jake as he throws his head back and downs another shot.
“Show me,” he ordered.
Jake lifts his chin and stares up at me as his fingers caress my ankle. His other hand wraps around my other leg and everything stops; my thoughts, my breathing, my guilt. Everything stops as Jake’s hands slowly slide up my calves.