Misty
Lavender fans out the skirt of an impossibly pink gown. I stare at my reflection in the mirror as she kneels, adjusting the hem.
I’m swimming in a sea of bubble gum. It’s not even my best color. It does nothing for my skin tone, or my hair, or my eyes.
But this color has always been mine. And somehow, Cole knew.
I smooth my hands over the tight waist, the boning, the satin fabric that flares out at my hips. It’s a real ball gown–fluffy and extravagant. I’m already a princess, but right now, I actually feel like one.
“My mom would flip if she saw me in this,” I say with a huff, my throat closing around the words. How many times have I promised myself I’d stop crying? A hundred? A thousand?
“In a good way, or a bad way?” Lavender asks, rising to adjust the poofy sleeves that taper at my wrists.
“A good way.” I blink back tears. “She’s going to hate that she’s missing my birthday. Probably more than she hates the idea of our family being at war over Solstice. It’s her favorite holiday.”
Lavender swallows hard, nodding, but obviously unsure what to say to comfort me right now. It’s useless. We both know any kind, reassuring words are absolutely pointless right now. Last night, three days after being nearly killed, watching Cole get stabbed, listening to Cole literally rip my cheating ex-boyfriend’s head off, and then healing Cole and breaking a vicious, ancient curse… I woke up to the news that Richard is here, in the castle, setting up camp with over a hundred of his order minions. Apparently, he has my birthday wrong–because the party is tonight.
My birthday is tomorrow.
“Where’s Cole today?” I ask, my mouth going dry. I haven’t seen him in days. He’d been around when I was in my second power-coma in the course of a week, of course. I have fractured memories of him fussing over me.
But ever since I woke up last night, I’ve been alone.
“He’s had his hands very full,” Lavender says quietly.
Yeah, no shit. Still, I want to see him. I want to talk to him, to ask if he has a plan for this party. I also want to just… be with him, for a moment. See him without knowing the curse is still in his body, his blood.
“Let’s finish your hair now,” Lavender says under her breath, motioning for me to move to the vanity where she’s set up a station full of hair pins and makeup.
I let her paint me like a porcelain doll. She twists my hair into an updo, pinning meticulously crafted curls on the top of my head with gem-encrusted clips and pins.
I ignore my reflection, staring down at my nails instead, lost in my tangled thoughts.
“Cole’s avoiding me, isn’t he?”
“No, sweetheart,” she whispers, giving me a sad smile in the mirror. “He’s….” She bites down on her lip.
“It’s because I’m pregnant, isn’t it?”
She pales. “No–”
“I remember. You did something. A scan, or something.”
“I confirmed it, yes,” she says under her breath, her cheeks flaring with heat. “I–I shouldn’t have, without your permission, but Cole was worried… for both of you, after your latest power… surge?”
I bite back a smile. “So, I’m pregnant, then?”
“There’s no longer a midwife here, seeing as she’s cursed and lurking downstairs somewhere in the servants quarters, but we had what we needed to confirm that, yes, you’re pregnant.”
I finally meet my eyes in the mirror. Cole must be so… so….
She squeezes my shoulder. “He loves you.”
“Don’t say that.” I turn from her and rise, striding across the moonlit bedroom to where a pair of heels have been laid out on the bed–just as pink as the dress.
“Misty. We should talk about this–”
“There’s nothing to talk about, especially tonight.” Especially about the idea of Cole loving me. The idea of Cole choosing me over this war with Richard.
Lavender huffs a breath before storming in my direction. She stops short, however, as I throw her a look and sink onto the edge of the bed to strap my heels around my ankles.
“Cole never wanted this.”
“I know that–”
“I don’t think you understand,” she grinds out.
“Who wants a war, Lavender?” I snap.
“That’s not what this is about–”
“I don’t know what this is!” I start to break–again. My heart is on the verge of shattering. I’m not sure the incredibly tight bodice squeezing my breasts is enough to hold it together.
“Cole loves you. You are everything he’s ever wanted. You should know that, before whatever tonight brings our way. This would have been easier on him had you not been involved–”
I scoff; she winces. “That didn’t come out like I meant it to.”
“It doesn’t matter,” I rush out, blinking rapidly to stop fresh tears from ruining my makeup.
“It does matter,” she asserts, her hands on her hips. The look on her face screams she’s made up her mind about something, and I remember that this woman is a mother–was a mother–and had a daughter, like me, at one point.
I know I’m supposed to just shut up and listen right now, even if her opinion about Cole’s feelings for me is the last thing I want to hear.
“I’ve known him since he was a child. His mother and I grew up together. I worked in this castle with her when we were new maids. I was there when Jaxon fell in love with her, when she found out he was her mate. I helped get her out, into hiding, so King Kane wouldn’t find out she was pregnant with Adam. I was there when Cole was born,” she says with a sad smile. “And he wasn’t born to be a king.”
I look up at her. She gives me a very sad, but knowing, smile as she continues, “He never wanted this. I’m not talking about a war, or a curse…. He never wanted to be king. He still doesn’t.”
“Then why is he fighting so hard to keep it?”
“That’s not what he’s fighting for.” She sits beside me. “He’s fighting for you. To give you a chance to get out, to be free, to have a life, even if it means he loses you.”
“I’ve only known him for a few weeks. He can’t feel that way about me yet.”
“I think you know he’s felt this way about you since the moment he saw you.”
I bite the inside of my cheek.
Her hand rests on my lower back. “Cole and his father didn’t get along. It started after Adam’s death, of course. Cole became the heir by law, and Jaxon required him to leave the village where he was raised and come here to finish his schooling, to train to be a warrior, to be a king. Cole fought him the whole time. At one point, Cole hated Jaxon. They… couldn’t be in the same room together without screaming at each other. His mother and I chalked it up to Cole being a surly teenager.”
“Why did they hate each other so much?”
She shakes her head. “Cole made it clear he had no intentions of being Alpha King. Jaxon wasn’t giving him a choice in the matter. When your aunt, Queen Ella, rose to power… Tarsian was nothing. It was a desert full of rogue packs, Alphas living in the shadow of the rebellion against Kane. Jaxon was one of those rebels. His pack was the largest, the most organized. He was charming and sharp–exactly what your aunt needed to control this area of Eastonia, so she made him Alpha King, and Cole, as he grew up, had different ideas about what Tarsian should be.”
She rises, pacing away from the bed as she continues, “Cole grew up looking toward the future, while Jaxon only saw the past. Cole believed more than one Alpha King was necessary for our kingdom. It’s the largest, by far. The most geographically challenging. We have deserts, mountains, and coastlines… hundreds of miles between the largest packs…. Cole knew it was already too much for Jaxon, who barely saw his mate and children.”
“And Cole wanted to be a doctor.”
“Yes,” she says weakly. “He did.” She sighs heavily, shaking her head. “He believes Ella should take over Tarsian, expand her powers here, choose her favorite Alphas and have multiple Alpha Kings.”
“Cole would dismantle his own kingdom?”
“He doesn’t see it that way, no,” she replies. “He saw the way it was killing his father. He didn’t want that for himself. Maybe, had Adam lived, Adam would have kept the kingdom intact and ruled, starting a family dynasty, but Cole… no. He wanted quiet. A little house in some cute neighborhood in Crescent Falls where he could drive a car to an even cuter clinic somewhere downtown. He wasn’t a child of Tarsian, even though he was born here. He never belonged here. He wanted more.”
“A clinic? Not the hospital?” I find myself lost in Lavender's vision of what kind of life Cole would have chosen for himself, had he had the option.
“He was halfway through his residency in pediatrics when he was called back to Tarsian,” she says softly, sadly.
“He wanted to work with kids?” My heart cracks, threatening to shatter into tiny shards with no chance of mending them back together again.
She nods. “He’d come home from TU, when he was studying his undergrad in biology, with sketchbooks full of blueprints for his future clinic. How he’d paint the walls with murals like a circus and…” She trails off, heartbroken. “When he was accepted to medical school in Crescent Falls, Jaxon knew Cole wasn’t coming back. That was it. He’d lost his heir, and I believe that might have been the reason he allowed Richard to sweep in with his grand vision and design for Tarsian. I think Jaxon believed he could tempt Cole to come back, and I know… I know it killed him when that failed, when Richard got the best of him, and Cole returned to Tarsian to clean up his father’s mess. Cole wanted… a wife. Kids. The family he didn’t have growing up, and even though Jaxon died by Cole’s blade… the fact that he killed his son’s dreams is what actually took his life.”
Silence chokes the room. She paces toward the windows, looking out at the full moon. “Cole is a good man.”
“I know,” I reply hoarsely.
“You gave him a few weeks of… the life he should have had, and I will be forever grateful to you for that.”
I chew my lower lip, closing my eyes as I fight for the words I’m looking for. How do I say that I’m not ready to give him up this easily? That my entire heart is here, lost to him? I’ll never be the same after this is said and done. Whether he’s my mate, or not. I would have felt that by now, right?
I’ll know tomorrow, I guess. Probably. If I ever come into my wolf.
Footsteps sound in the depths of our rooms. I turn to Cole, my heart lifting with excitement but… It’s not Cole.
Commander Orion approaches wearing a tuxedo. He looks stiff and uncomfortable as he clears his throat, bobs his head at me, and slides his gaze to Lavender. “It’s time.”
“She’s ready,” Lavender replies, nerves and heartache clear in her tone.
I turn to Orion. “Where’s Cole?”
“He’ll be there,” Orion replies, but I shake my head.
“What’s going on? He’s planning something, isn’t he?”
Orion purses his lips and glances at Lavender. “Did he tell her?”
“No,” she echoes, and now I’m getting pissed.
“Tell me what?”
Orion gently takes my arm, tucking my hand in the crook of his elbow. “It’s time for your party, Princess. Our guests are waiting.”