Lucas' P.O.V.
Rose had fallen asleep beside me, but not before filling my heart and ego to the brim.
Her knight.
I liked that she thought of me that way. I'd happily fight demons and dragons for her. Although, right now, the only demon around is her father. I'll hire a man to do some digging for me. Once I know why he's here I'll pay him a visit myself. I won't let Rose face him again.
I opened her journal back up, picking up where I left off on her first day of freshman year high school. I liked seeing this side of Rose. I loved being able to read her innermost thoughts about her life, her friends, and her classes. It was like I was there with her. She was sharing a big part of herself with me by allowing me to read these journals, and I don't plan on letting her down.
Dear future me, (Because who says dear diary anymore?)
I hope you're doing better than me right now. This new school, although amazing academically, lacks in social etiquette. The girls are all bitchy and the boys are all immature. There is one boy who seems to be calm and collected. Derek Nelson. I heard he's the smartest boy in our grade. I wonder if that's true? I was going to try to talk to him today, but I never got the nerve.
Honestly, I raced out of school when the bell rang, trying to get into dad's rusted and crappy pick up truck. Every kid here comes from money, and being the only one who doesn't, already has me at a disadvantage. I don't need them to pick on me for dad's car. I'm sure you remember our daily evening fight sessions with dad. Have we beat him yet? I hope so, because today was especially brutal. I think he's stressed about something and it's making fighting him 10 times worse.
He forgot to do the shopping again, so I had to go out this evening and buy whatever I could carry back home. Dad had drunk too much alcohol to drive just an hour after bringing me home from school. Funny how we never seem to run out of liquor, but food is always scarce.
I walked back home with the few groceries I could carry, but I managed to cook and even made enough food for him to eat. Currently, he's snoring on the couch, beer bottle still in hand. Has he stopped drinking yet? I sincerely hope so. I better get started on all the homework my new teachers assigned. I don't know if you remember, but they told us our public education hadn't amounted to anything, and they are going to catch me up to my classmates' level. Even though I'm there already.
With lots of hope for the future,
Past you
First entry and I'm already feeling upset. Her father was a worthless piece of shit. What I hated most was the fact that she didn't find an escape at school, but instead found more misery. It's a cruel world when both school and your home torment you. I'm surprised Rose survived all of this. I flipped the page eager to read more about my Rose.
Dear future me,
Today sucked ass. You remember Derek Nelson (smartest and coolest guy at this school). Well, he talked to us. Honest to goodness, just came up to me and started a conversation. He asked what school I had gone to before here. He was being nice and polite, making it easy for me to answer his questions. I should have known better than to think he was interested in being my friend. He quickly let everyone know what I'd told him.
I am the poor kid, who's mother isn't around. I'm the kid who can only afford to be here because of a scholarship. I am a fool for thinking Derek Nelson could ever be interested in me. I should know not to trust a pretty boy. They always seem nice, but in reality they're chameleons. I've noticed popular pretty boys are able to change their nature depending on who they are around. They can be sweet when they need to be, cruel when they want, seeming smart when they have to be. It's all a charade and no one really notices.
Who are you really Derek Nelson? Are you a coward behind closed doors? Are you bullied at home, so you have to find a way to be in control here at school? Or are you just some knd of sociopath? Either way, Derek, you've now made it onto my shit list. It's not a very long list, but I feel like it's going to grow in this school.
Please tell me we have good friends in the future? Tell me we've found someone who understands us? Are we dating anyone? God, I wish I could fast forward this part of my life.
Hoping you're having better luck,
Past you.
I frowned as I finished reading her entry. I hated knowing that on her second day there things had already gone bad. How could anyone not be interested in my Rose? She's perfect in every way. I'll be looking up Derek Nelson on social media later. Her shit list will be my shit list too. Asshole. I guess it makes sense why it took her a while to trust me. I flipped the page feeling addicted to know what happens next. I felt like I had picked up a delectable book that I can't put down until it's finished.
Dear future me,
Kill Derek Nelson. Formulate the perfect murder and then do it. That son of a bitch! I'm not sure if you remember, although how could you forget? Derek spread a rumor that in an attempt to get his attention I followed him home. He told everyone he felt bad for me and invited me inside where he fed me. I was made out to seem like some starved teenager that ravished his fridge and was awestruck by his home.
He makes it sound like I live in a shack and not a nice residential home like most. He even went as far as to say I offered him sex for money! I swear I'll murder him. I would have beat his ass if I knew it wouldn't get me expelled. I don't understand why he did it. I haven't done anything to him. I've done him no wrong for him to be this way. If he's that bored he could have just said so. I would have had him meet me at the gym where I could have taught him a thing or two. Starting with how to block your face.
I just want to break that perfect little nose of his. Do me a favor and look him up in the future. Invite him to the gym, pretend not to know anything and have him "teach" you how to throw a punch. When he asks you to punch, show him how it's done right in the face! That stupid son of a bitch. God, I'm so mad. Now I'm getting picked on by all the girls. They told me I need to stay away from Derek. Actually, they told me to stay away from all the boys at school.
I hate this place. Please tell me it at least payed off and we're at our dream college.
A royally pissed off past you.
I'm right there with you Rose, feeling real ticked off. I've been to schools like this all my life. There was a Derek Nelson or two at every school. The guy who was popular for the things he said he did or happened to him. I've been witness to these kinds of rumors before. I never paid them any mind, but I also never stopped them. My stomach twisted with guilt for not being a better person in high school.
I laid the journal against my chest, looking down at my beautiful Rose. She was sleeping so peacefully beside me. You would never guess she had been through so much. The sound of her deep breaths were soothing, helping me calm down. I hope that she made at least one friend in that hell. Hopefully, she had at least a light in that darkness.
Dear future me,
Life really fucking sucks! Zaiden Brier threw a wad of cash at me today, asking how much I charge. He did it in the lunch room in front of everyone. I'd never wanted to die so bad in my life! I wanted to become the chair I was sitting in. Honestly, what I really wanted to do was grab the chair, and hit him across the face with it.
I was mortified! Everyone either laughed or whispered more rumors about me. I couldn't do shit, except get up and leave. I told him he couldn't pay me enough to even touch him. He didn't like that very much, finding me after school. He tried to pin me down, but quickly learned you can't mess with me like that. He was rubbing his wrist as I walked away from him. I could see he understood that any further physical touches would result in one of his limbs being broken.
Dad didn't drink today, surprisingly, but it's because he was fighting tonight. He's getting back into the swing of things, but I know he's rusty. I'm not exactly a good spar for him. I get the feeling he'll be in the worst mood possible if he loses tonight. Please God, let him win. Let him win, make some money, be in a good mood, and maybe, actually, buy some food.
A pretty hungry past you.
My hands were gripping the journal so hard that I was sure I left an indent. Scratch Derek Nelson. Zaiden Brier is first on my list. These guys have no idea how badly their past is about to catch up to them. Karma is a real bitch, and if she hasn't dealt with them already, I most certainly will. I continued reading until around 3 in the morning when my eyes finally started to stick with sleep. My shit list had grown exponentially with kids that picked on my Rose. She had the worst first semester of freshman year, so far.
I'll make it better, Rose.