We are steering through the outskirts of Nairobi's central business center at 9:30 at ; I don't know where exactly we are going to. This Greek god is being peevish killing me with anxiety because he is not disclosing to me where we are going. I the phrase ' surprise', but still, it won't hurt to give me even just a clue, dah!
More than four hours of chronic driving is more than enough to drive me nuts. My is beginning to itch really bad. It always gets irritated by sitting in a car for too . My spine too. Damn!
As I revel in the sight of this architectural marvel, a surge of excitement courses my veins, infusing each moment with a palpable sense of anticipation. The ’s spellbinding beauty is spreading like a beacon of so many beautiful things.
I remember the last time I drove out of it with so much anger and uncertainty. I was through an erratic emotional catastrophe. I didn't know where I was going or I was going to do. Nor where I was headed. I had no destination in mind at . All I desired was to get away from all the madness, heartaches, and betrayal. I my peace of mind, my own sanity, and healing. I just pressed on the gas pedal of Porsche, and wherever the ardent waves of my resentment were willing to take me,
I was willing to go. Now, looking back at what has transpired within those few —four months to be precise—I can boldly say that it was a decision worth . It was a journey worth embarking on. It was a risk worth sacrificing for.
Through acts of rebellion, not only did I find my true love, the beauty god beside me now, but I became cognizant of my strengths and weaknesses. I unearthed a lot things about myself that I wasn't aware of. My passions, my desires, my likes and 'ts, and a lot more. I discovered new things on this journey. Actually, I feel like all life I didn’t know who I was until I took that bold decision to leave everything and behind and start afresh. I feel like, more than discovering new things, I my real self.
I was fearful of so many things before. I knew I was a strong person, but there were so things that I could not confront for the longest time of my life, despite of how I thought I was. But I blamed myself when I was pushed to the core and left with decision that involved my entire life. I conquered all the fear and chose to stand by I believed in. And I am so glad I did.
Now, I can confidently say that I can face everything head-on. Whatever that life at my way. I can also confidently say that all the fear I lived with is long gone.
But on this journey, I have developed a new fear: losing Damian. He is the one vessel that I can't handle losing. My strengths and weaknesses. With him, I complete, and without him, I am just an empty soul. He is a vital piece of me that I not envision life without. The rest I can handle and also live without. But not him.
Not Damian!
"You okay?" Damian speaks, perhaps after noticing I am lost in thoughts.
I fake a smile, but a genuine one. "Yeah. This town just reminded me a lot about me."
I shift in my seat, breathing out the thoughts of my previous life.
I found a new life. A new me. And I am content. Though there are things I can't let go , like my father, I am happy this way right now. Someday, we will find common to resolve our issues as father and daughter. And that will make me the soul on earth. Blood is thicker than water, they say, and Damian added more to that last night when he said my father still loves and adores me as his own, his own ways. If that is so, then there is still hope that we will someday break this between us and forgive each other for the harm that we have caused each other.
That is my only prayer.
"Do you regret what you did?" Damian asks again, reaching out for my hand and it into his.
Mmh! I love the heat in his hand.
It is night, and the climate here deviates so much from that of Mombasa. It's damn here, and showers of rain are beginning with muffled pitches of thunderstorms lightning.
With utmost boldness coated with a genuine glimmer, I shake my head. "No. In these months, I have lived the happiest life that I have ever lived. This has been the fulfilling and happiest moments of my life despite all the hurly-burly, and that tells me that I made the right choice," I answer with all sincerity.
He kisses my hand, adding more to the warmth I am reaping from his grip. Damn, this ! I feel like jumping between his legs and snuggling up to his chest. I mean, guy seems to be bleeding fire while I am freezing here.
"I am glad you are happy. I wouldn't be able to even breathe peacefully if you 't."! "That would make me a very terrible fiance."
Ah, I see! How can I not be happy with him? He is every damned woman's dream, I had to be the lucky one to steal his heart. The perception of being married has whetted me this much. Watching these beautiful features as I go to sleep and up by his side in the morning is something I dream of. It got to be soon! I nothing more than to spend my life with him.
"And you?" I query.
"What about me?" He quizzes.
"Are you happy?" I ask. Ooh, I know he so damn is. I mean, he never misses a chance tell me how happy and content he is with me. With our love. With us