Jenny’s POV
If I wasn’t so used to abuse, I would’ve spilled my guts right there and told him everything.
His closeness emanated unimaginable fear in me.
He was holding my chin in his hand, trapping me in place, and bullying me into spelling out all my secrets.
His hold on my chin was surprisingly gentle, but I had a feeling that gentleness wasn’t going to last.
Even before, when he didn’t make a move to hurt me as he gave me so many chances to speak the truth, it was utterly astonishing to me. He was really trying to listen and believed every word I said to him.
It made a flicker of hope rise within the sea of unending fear and immense hate. Maybe he’s not as inclined to torment me as I originally thought he was.
Right now I had two options only. The third one; where I tell him how I’m planning to save my mom out of town tonight, was off limits.
I either stand my ground and tell him to do his worst to me, but he still won’t get any more answers out of me, or beg him to let me go.
I’m not really the begging type. But I still had to consider the fact that I was still one giant bruised up human being with a much shorter pain endurance as I could still feel every bruise and whip mark left on my entire body.
I looked at him in defeat and took the coward way out.
“Please Alex….I told you everything you wanted to know about Simon because it concerned you and your family, but what I do and feel in my own private life is my business and mine alone”
He narrowed his eyes and looked at me for a long time before speaking sternly “If I find out that whatever your hiding will bring harm to my family, I swear to you, you will pay for it”
His threat had my insides churning and my stomach rolling as the nausea settled into it.
Getting irritated by the swarm of unending threats, I snap back at him the same words he said to me earlier “I’m not the soulless beast you think I am”
His mouth lifts into a tiny smirk as he says “We’ll see about that”
I keep waiting for him to back off and release my chin, as the closeness was really creeping me out and causing me to imagine the worst case scenario.
He never gave me any indication that he will not touch me sexually and I found the lack of that declaration scaring the hell out of me more than the physical abuse.
I resist the urge to smack his hand and break his hold on me, as I wait for him to do it on his own.
It feels like forever until he lets me go.
Without saying anything else, he went into the closet, retrieved his clothes, and went into the bathroom.
As soon as the door closed behind him, I finally managed to take my first deep breath since the beginning of that extremely intense confrontation.
It took several minutes, multiple attempts, and a considerable amount of inhaling and exhaling to finally move from my spot.
I knew one thing then, hiding and lying again to Alex Snow will be the last mistake I attempt to make.
I take my phone from the bed where he tossed it and delete Simon’s message. I then proceeded to block incoming calls from all unsaved numbers.
I plug it back into the charger and put it in silent mode.
I go to the closet and quickly change into my pajamas before he walks out of the bathroom.
With nothing left to do, and no intention to sleep yet, I go to the window ledge and settle there as I stare at the front yard through the curtains.
I couldn’t help the jumble of nervousness that started creeping inside of me as I worried about tonight’s plan going sideways. If they got caught by my uncle, there will be no more chances of escaping. It will all be over. If my uncle takes her as his wife, I will tear through hell, kill him myself, rather than let him lay one finger on her.
“I thought we had an agreement” I heard Alex saying quietly to me.
I was too deep in my own worries, I didn’t hear him come out of the bathroom.
I turned my head towards him. He was standing at the chair in front of me.
I raised my eyebrows as I asked him in confusion “What do you mean?”
“You agreed to sleep on the bed from now on”
I gritted my teeth as I answered reluctantly “I did. I’m just not sleepy right now”
He nodded his head then said smugly “Fine, but if I catch you asleep here I will carry you to the bed myself, just thought I’d give you a heads up”
I resist the urge to tell him that if he attempts to do that I will hit him, and turn my head back to the window instead.
I sense him going to the room door and locking it with a key before he closes all the lights and goes to his side of the bed.
I roll my eyes and shake my head in exasperation.
After everything, he still doesn’t trust me.
Paranoid smug asshole.
I check my watch and disappointment washes over me. It’s still 9:45 p.m. So much time left until Megan and mom hit the road.
I told mom to stay in touch with me via WA during every step they take. Right until she boards the plane.
The anticipation of what’s to come makes me feel queasy and agitated.
My collarbone was burning like never before.
I was late in the bathroom and gave time for Alex to snoop on my phone because I was checking my wound in the mirror.
Much to my added horror, it looked like the early signs of infection was beginning to form on the ripped part of the wound. There was a little puss oozing out from it.
I had no idea what to do about it.
It will force me to tell Alex and seek medical attention.
I pushed that dreadful future conversation until tomorrow. At least until my mission succeeds and my mom safely lands in Canada tomorrow morning.
One thing at a time Jenny.
Argh! The way Alex called me Jenny after he saw it written by Simon was freaking disturbing. I think I prefer he continues to call me Jennifer instead despite how much I came to despise that name over the years.
The thought of him starting to call me Jenny made goosebumps rise in my arms. As if we could ever be able to have a friendly relationship while he does nothing but stir fear and hate from within my very soul.
A wave of pain passes through me and I fight the instinct to grab my right shoulder.
I look over at Alex and see the light of his phone illuminating his face.
He was sitting against the headboard, his eyes concentrating on whatever was being displayed on his phone.
Time passes at the speed of a freaking turtle while I stay in my spot fighting the sleep that started to claim me.
It was an emotional roller coaster of a day, not to mention the lack of sleep the night before.
Just as midnight descends, I am no longer able to keep my eyes open anymore. I look over at Alex and discover he was still on his phone.
I couldn’t help but suspect that he wasn’t going to sleep until he makes sure I hold up my agreement to sleep on the bed.
Why the hell does he care where I sleep?
Isn’t watching me suffer while I sleep on the floor or at the ledge more satisfying to him?
Why does he care about my comfort while he does nothing but strike the fear of god in me every chance he got?
My mind was occupied with a lot of things, I didn’t have time to psychoanalyze his weird personality.
I hastily come down from the ledge and go over to my side of the bed.
I notice he already laid the long pillow between us as I slide into my side.
My heart was beating double its speed as I laid on my back. It was so bizarre, sleeping next to a stranger for the first time in my life. A stranger I fear and loath. A Stanger I expect anything from.
I find myself unable to stop my threat from escaping as I stare into his face and warn him coldly for the first time since we got married “If any part of you touches me while we’re sleeping; intentionally or not, I will not be held responsible for my actions, are we clear?”
He surprises me by grinning as he asks curiously “What will these actions be, may I ask?”
I narrow my eyes at him. It was the first time I saw such a positive genuine emotion on his face ever since we met, and to be at the receiving end of it made my heart skip a beat.
Damn you stupid blind heart! Why are you reacting to his stupid grin? I hate him and don’t you forget that next time ok? Ok.
I swallow and answer challengingly “Touch me and find out”
His grin deepens as he asks “And what if a part of you ends up touching me while we’re sleeping…. Intentionally or not? What shall I do then?”
“Don’t worry about that. My subconscious will not attempt to go anywhere near a danger magnet like you” I fire back.
I don’t wait for him to reply as I give him my back and sleep on my right side. I had to bite back a wince as my wound objects to that sleeping position but I ignore it.
“We’ll see how smart your subconscious is in the morning I guess. Good night…. Jenny” he says mockingly.
I stiffen all over and involuntarily turn on my back as I hiss at him furiously “Don’t ever call me Jenny again”
His eyebrows shoot up in wonder “Well apparently you hate to be called Jennifer as I always see you cringe whenever I call you with it… thought I would try my luck with Jenny instead”
Damn he’s a lot more observant than I gave him credit for.
My mouth turns into a thin line as he begins to get on my nerves “Only the people I love are allowed to call me that and you will never ever get into that category Alex Snow. Don’t call me Jenny again”
I give him my back, having made my point bluntly clear.
Thankfully he lets the conversation drop at that.
I was half expecting him to berate me for boldly snapping at him multiple times in the course of five minutes, but he doesn’t.
I hear him put his phone on the nightstand and lay down on the bed.
I close my eyes in frustration and surrender to sleep right away, despite the high awareness of the existence of an unpredictable man sleeping a mere few inches from me.
***
I awake with the irresistible urge to vomit.
I try to make as little movements as possible so I don’t wake Alex up as I get off the bed, unplug and snatch my phone from the charger, and make a run to the bathroom, closing the door quietly behind me.
I don’t have time to lock it or open the lights, as I begin to hurl my dinner into the toilet.
I try not to gag loudly as my stomach heaves viciously.
When I finally empty everything that was inside my stomach, I close the lid and flush.
At that point, I was terribly shaking, sweating, and a bit dizzy.
I crawl away from the toilet and rest my back against the cold glass shower door breathing heavily.
I check my phone and my heart jumps up into my throat. It was 5:13 a.m. With shaking hands and extremely anxious anticipation, I check my messages. I had many. From both mom and Megan.
I open mom’s messages and read them. She sent one telling me she got into Megan’s car, another one when they passed through the town borders without any obstacles, a third one when she arrived at the airport, then a picture.
My tears started falling when I opened it. It was a selfie of her inside the plane.
She made it!
She’s finally getting the freedom she deserved.
I locked the phone as my tears started streaming and my sobs became harder to contain.
I was both happy and sad at the same time.
I was supposed to be with her.
We were supposed to start our new life together.
At the same time I was happy for her, she escaped my uncle’s evil plans for her.
She could no longer be held as leverage to make me a toy in anyone else’s sick game.
No one can force me into doing anything again. There’s no body left for them to hold at gun point to get me to obey.
The alarm on my watch goes off and I instantly shut it down.
Oh my god! I totally forgot to take my insulin shot before sleep. Despite my watch reminding me about it before I slept, I totally forgot and went to sleep.
I was hyperglycemic. I needed insulin. No wonder I felt so sick.
I tried to get up multiple times but my head was spinning vigorously. So I stayed where I was. Not caring one bit about what might happen to me if I stay here without insulin.
I was in such a dark place over my lost chance at happiness, I wished for death right there.
Every ten minutes my alarm goes off again and I shut it up instantly. By the fourth time it went off, no matter how much I tried to stop it, it wouldn’t stop blaring loudly. I guess it was in survival mode for if I was unconscious or something it would alert the whole damn house on me. I never knew about it because I never let it get that far during all that time I was wearing it.
“Shut up…. Please” I beg it quietly and suppress the urge to take it off and smash it so it would finally stop ringing.
Without any fucking notice, Alex bursts through the door and turns on the lights frantically looking for me.
I snap at him weakly “What the fuck is wrong with you? How about knocking first?”
He crouches in front of me as he starts inspecting me from head to toe with his eyes and says intensely “What the fuck is wrong with you? Why are you sitting on the ground like this?”
He suddenly grabs my wrist and looks at my watch; which was still blaring, I try to snatch it back but he keeps an iron grip on it.
“What does this mean?“ he asks me frantically.
“It means fuck off” I sneer.
His eyes get icy cold as he glares at me.
For the first time, I don’t regret speaking my thoughts to him freely, I don’t regret it, I don’t wish to take it back, and most importantly I don’t fear the retributions anymore.
He warns darkly “You either tell me how to fix this here or I will drag your ass to the hospital and let them deal with you, what do you say?“
“I say fuck o…” he puts his large hand on my mouth and cuts my sentence.
And just for a split nanosecond before his hand covered my mouth, I thought he was going to hit me with it or something.
I stare at him with a surprised expression.
He leans into my face and speaks deadly serious “Fix this here or go to the hospital, but either way you’re not dying on my watch. So pick one before I lose all common sense on you… Jenny”
My eyes shoot daggers at him while my mouth can’t as he deliberately uses my nickname.
He removes his hand and growls in a low voice “What’s it gonna be?”
While the hospital seems like a wiser option especially since I need treatment for a possible infection he doesn’t know about, I find myself whispering nonetheless “I’ll fix it myself”
I grab my phone from the floor and try to use the glass door I was leaning on to support myself to a standing position.
I feel his arm sneaking around my back to support me and I glare at him in warning.
He pulls his hand back and stares at me with annoyance.
I make it two steps on my own before the world starts spinning and I sway to the left uncontrollably. A strong hand keeps me from falling and wraps around my waist as he hisses under his breath “Stop being so damn stubborn for once”
He grabs my left hand gently while his other one supports my weight as he walks me out of the bathroom into my side of the bed.
He sits me down and without asking for it, grabs my medical bag from the dresser and hands it to me.
His mom must have told him everything, I realized.
Is that why he was willing to listen to me before doing anything dire after dinner? And despite my hesitation multiple times to reveal everything, he still didn’t make a move to get me to confess, was it just because he knew I had diabetes? Because he was afraid for my health?
I didn’t know how that made me feel towards him. Gratitude? Relief? I didn’t know.
I fumbled with preparing my injection multiple times as I was having the worst case of shaking hands at the moment.
Without looking at him as he sat next to me on the bed, I felt his eyes tracking my every move.
I lifted my shirt a little to expose some skin on my stomach and held the insulin pen tightly in my hand, trying to still my trembling. I tried multiple times but I couldn’t control my shaking at all.
“Let me” I heard him whisper gently as he extended his palm in my direction.
I looked up at him in surprise. I saw genuine deep concern printed on his face and light grey eyes. Taken aback by that sudden gentle caring attitude, I found myself unconsciously handing him the pen.
He leaned closer to me in concentration and I felt my breath catch.
I pointed my finger at the injection site and said tightly “Inject at a ninety degree angle all the way, then push the knob and keep it for ten seconds”
“Ok” he says calmly and does as instructed.
He looks up at me after ten seconds for confirmation and I nod my head.
He removes the pen and hands it back to me. I dispose of the small needle and put the cap back on the pen. I put everything away inside the bag and leave it at the night stand.
“Now what?“ Alex asks warily.
I glance at him and speak stiffly “Now nothing. It will stabilize in a few minutes”
He looks at me for a while and I don’t look away this time.
“Did you throw up? Is that why you were in the bathroom?” he asked tightly.
Yeah he could probably sniff it from my horrible mouth smell.
I answered curtly “Yes but don’t worry, I didn’t make a mess, the toilet is clean”
He shakes his head slightly and says impatiently “That’s not my point. Did it happen because of the diabetes or was it something else? And does is this frequently happen to you?“
I narrow my eyes at him and scoff “Please, spare me the fake husband concern Alex, it doesn’t suit your persona especially when it’s directed towards me”
He fixes me with a cold glare as he says sternly “You’re unbearable”
I retort “And you’re intolerable. I guess we both can go back to sleep now that we’ve established that”
I don’t wait for him to get off my side as I make an effort to lay on my back without paying him the slightest attention.
He goes over to his side and lays in the same position.
My watch finally decides to stop making that loud noise. I check it and find my levels back to normal.
I feel Alex’s eyes on me, so I give him my back as I wallow silently in my own sadness and self pity over being left totally on my own in this god forsaken town.
This day was supposed to be my first day of freedom. Instead, it was just another reminder of how miserable my life will always be.