There have existed four days since the scolding I received from Adrian, meaning 's a Friday. The sun has already gone down, dusk is taking over, and I am desolately straddled at our favourite locale in the kitchen, reminiscing how horrible the week has been. I know I had said that my monthly cycle are disastrous ones, but please, I take that back now. The cold and tight- antidote I have received from Adrian these past four days is way too much has not allowed me to rest.
He is awfully distant. We don't share coffee anymore. We don't talk, and if we do, 's only greetings, and maybe a question here and there which is only about his . To top it all off, I was discontinued from taking Angel to and from school.
He wakes up early to prepare her and drops her off at school then he proceeds to work. In the evening, he sends the chauffeur to pick her up from school, and her to him in his office. I am left here with almost no work at all, and the only I do to kill time is just calling home once a day because I honestly don't feel talking to anyone. The situation is choking me.
I am still unequipped to decipher why the fallacy with Andy has encompassed me much, but then I guess this is how someone feels when they discover that they stung the feelings of their boss, especially in such a ridiculous run-down way mine.
I am not furious with Andy for being wildly mad at me and admonishing me. I him. I should have known better that his daughter means everything to . I should have glued to my lane and report the issue to him. But what did I do ? I decided to play the smart guy. I knew how susceptible he is regarding about Angel, but still, I chose to please his daughter, without thinking of implications of my action or the consequences. It didn't even bridge my silly just how all that would make him feel. Stupid me!!!
It's all my fault. I hope he is not waiting to pay me off and fire me. I can't afford to back home and wait for the misfortunes to befall us, particularly now that I was the bank gave us up to mid-next month to make our first payment. I don't want visualize what will ensue if we don't get the money to make that payment. My might become homeless and I can't bear that. Getting another job will be hunting a white elephant, especially for people like us who don't have papers present. I need to keep this one. I am crossing my fingers in the hope that Adrian still want to hold me after this.
How ironic, huh? The lips that kissed me with so much passion one morning, are same lips that spoke to me with so much resentment and abhorrence the same evening! I can only imagine how disgusted he was with me, and still is, the way I am with myself.
The most annoying fraction of all these is how that morning kiss has remained in my mind even after everything that has ensued. It just feels so raw, like it this morning, and I am finding it arduous to not flush it out of my mind. I freshly recall the feeling of his touch and the sweet taste of his lips. The mare of that kiss makes me tremble with the longing for another touch, another , another analogous feeling just like that.
Countless times, I have asked myself what the kiss meant to him. But how can I that if even I don't know what it meant for me, or why I permitted it? All I is that it felt sweet, it felt... so beautiful, it felt surreal, and I savour that little . But then I ask myself again, did it feel right? The response is, yes, for that I don't know.
My hair rises at the thought of kissing him again. I feel the urge to kiss him again.
To feel my cheeks reddening in his palms, to feel his warm breath caress my . I want to feel myself melt in his hands, and taste his lips once again. I to explore his mouth as he explores mine. Still, is it moral? Is it right to desire in this weirdly lustful way? My boss? I don't know. I honestly don't.
My phone buzzes, snapping my mind from the world of the lost and confused. It's a new number, and since I don't feel like talking, especially to annoying persons, I reject the call, and sip my already cold coffee. Yack! It's so bitter when it's cold. Phthoo!!! I take the flask and pour a hot one into a cup, and trash the cold one in the sink.
My phone rings again, indicating the same caller, and I put it into silent mode. My is already full as it is, I will call back whoever is calling tomorrow. Perhaps head will have cleared a little.
Before I can take a sip, I hear the front door opening, and I know it is Andy. Finally,
I feel relieved. I wasn't even cognizant that I was anxious all the while, because were not yet home. I take a sip of my coffee and I swear, this one tastes than the first cup.
I thought of going to meet them in the living room, but I slug that thought when I 't hear Angel's voice. The kid must have fallen asleep in the car like yesterday the day before. Certainly, Adrian does not want to see my suffocating face. The of how disgruntled he is with me changed the flavour of coffee once again, this sip that I just took doesn't taste anything close to sweet like the one. I toss it aside. I'm done with this stupid coffee tonight.
I rest my elbows on the table, placing my chin between my open plans, looking up my eyes closed to the healing. I need some voice to whisper to me that things be okay. I need a consoling sign to show me that things are still under control.
I don't know how long I have been mentally crying out to the heavens, but as if my touched the hearts of the heavenly angels, I am startled by heavy footsteps the doorway.
I stand up, turning to the entrance of the kitchen, my entire being almost getting by the sight of him.
ANDY?
The last time he strode inside this kitchen when I am in, was that cursed twilight of
Monday. That cursed night he yelled at me with so much bitterness. Since then, he comes in to take his coffee when I go to bed which I leave in the flask.
"Hi! How are you?" He asks, parking himself on a stool next to me and plopping phone on the table.
How am I, huh? How do you expect me to be, Adrian Ashton? I mean, after me of my main duty in this house and then going all tight-lipped and on me?
That's what I want to scream at him, but I dare not. I compose myself. I don't to add salt to the injury once more, and besides, I deserve this. Instead of yelling, "I am okay," is what I bitterly force out of my mouth.
"Can I get a cup of coffee?" He asks after eyeing me from the hair to the toe.
"Sure, sir!" I say as I walk to grab his favourite mug, but he grabs my hand, me stop on the spot. I can feel my body start reciting the Deja vou due to touch, but I instruct my guards to stay strong. This is not the time to show him effortlessly he arouses me.
"Sir? We are back to that again? What happened to Andy?" He asks with a raised , boring deep into my orbs. I may be right or wrong, but I have a sense that is not that mad at me. He is not the enraged Andy. I feel like he is the Andy I so free with before that nasty mishap. My Andy!
Mine, huh?
Bitter sigh!