Hayden walked back into my room, carrying two plates with pizza on it.
He sat down, placing the plates in front of us. He glanced at me.
"What's up with you? Looks like you've seen a ghost."
I swallow, not quite able to speak yet. My mind is racing. Hayden's father is in prison?
What did he do? How long has he been in there? When is he due to be let out?
"G," Hayden said to me, gently pressing his finger on my cheek, forcing me to look at him. "What's wrong?"
"I just did something really bad," I whispered. "You're going to be so mad at me."
"Mad at you?" he questioned, a frown creasing his forehead.
Slowly, his eyes lowered to his phone that was beside me. He pulled his hand from me, moving back.
"What did you do?"
"I don't know what I was thinking," I whispered, squeezing my eyes shut. "I'm so sorry."
"Grace," he said slowly. "I won't be mad, just tell me."
"Your phone rang," I choked out, slowly opening my eyes. His lips spread into a thin line. He nodded, telling me to go on. "I answered it. It was your dad trying to contact you... I think."
He nodded, his face not giving away what he was feeling. "Prisoner from Silver Water, by any chance?"
"Yeah."
"That would be him," he replied, moving to my side. He took a bite from his pizza, not saying anything else, his face stoic.
"I'm really sorry to invade your privacy like that."
He let out a breath. "I should have told you about it, really. I don't want there to be any secrets between us."
I cast my eyes down.
"William John Cameron," he said suddenly. "My infamous father who was loved and adored by everyone in this town. He was a hot-shot lawyer. He was one of the most sought out lawyers in the state. He won every case he had."
"That's impressive."
"Yeah, it was," he agreed. "Until he got older. He started not winning. His associate became him. The guy he trained became better than him and he couldn't handle it. It was really hard on him, his loyal clients going to someone younger, less experienced... Someone he trained, you know?"
I nod.
"It really messed with him. He started drinking. He was coming home early, drinking... He would be drunk when I got home. He was a hot-head and loved a good argument. Would get pissed if I didn't argue back with him. He loved a fight, that's just who he was. I stayed extra-long at practices, focusing on my swimming. I have him to thank, really. I put so much time into swimming, to get away from him. It really helped my skill.
Anyway, he was never abusive, physically. He just loved to start shit. Mum hated it. She told me she was going to leave him. She was over the way he was treating her. I came home from school and they were arguing. I knew she was telling him that she wanted a divorce. He was blind drunk, at that point. He was always drunk. He got pissed, he grabbed her. He pushed her. I was so surprised - I knew he was a hot-head kind of guy, but he had never laid a finger on either of us before.
The thing was, he didn't realise how close he was to the stairs. When he pushed mum, she fell. She fell down the stairs and severed her spinal cord. I remember running to her. She wasn't even crying. She was frozen. She couldn't move. I remember screaming at her, yelling at her, telling her to get up so we could get away from him.
I rang the ambulance. Dad came flying down the stairs, trying to help. I was so mad. The rest is just a blur, honestly. I remember throwing him against the wall. I remember the feel of his nose breaking as I hit him."
At this point, Hayden is completely absorbed in memories. I stare, my lips parted, shock coursing through me. I had not expected that.
"That's why he's in prison," he said hoarsely, leaning back on the head rest of my bed, his arms falling limp by his side. "Assault."
"Shit," I breathed, having no idea what I could possibly say to him right now.
He rubbed his hands over his face. "Yeah."
I sat there, my mind unable to come up with something useful or helpful to say.
"Mum's on a disability pension so that covers her carers. My grandparents, who you met, are really wealthy. They basically support us and they pay for me to go to school. I don't know what I would have done without them. If I can get a scholarship to university, for swimming, that would make life so much easier."
"That's good you do have them," I agreed. "They seem lovely."
"They are. That's why I don't drink, by the way. I don't want to be anything like him."
"You aren't," I insisted.
"Aren't I?" he asked, drawing his dark eyebrow up, his face unreadable as his green, calculating eyes stared into mine.
"No, you're not." I replied, not backing down.
He let out a sigh, closing his eyes as silence fell between us. I chewed at my lip, playing with a loose thread in my pants.
"Eat your pizza," he suddenly said, picking up another piece. "It'll go cold, otherwise."
I took a bite of the pizza, reclining back, my mind reeling with all this information.
"Let's just forget about it, alright?"
"Okay."
"I don't want to think about it for a while and enjoy being with you."
I gave him a small smile, moving so that my hand was in his. He gave it a tight squeeze.
"Hayden, I need to be honest about something that has been really getting to me."
"Okay," he said slowly, shifting so that his full attention was on me.
"A couple months ago, I was... seeing someone, I guess you can call it. It was a big mistake. I had no one - my mum was never here; I was excluded at school. I had Harvey of course, but even you were an asshole to me."
His face fell.
"Anyway, I rushed into a... it wasn't a relationship but whatever it was, with the first person who paid me any attention and it is something I really regret. I never slept with him or anything, but I feel I have to tell you."
He nodded, frowning slightly. "Is it over now?"
"Of course," I said with a nod. "It hasn't been going on for a while now. I just wanted to tell you, that's all."
His name was tingling on my tongue. This was it. My moment to tell Hayden that I have hooked up with Coach Brennon.
"Good. I'm glad," he smiled. "If it's someone from school, I don't want to know who it is. I'll just want to punch them for having you first."
I let out a soft sigh, knowing I was weak and was going to use this as yet another excuse not to tell him. At least I'd told him half of it...
"Are you sure? I think you'll want to know."
"I'm positive."
"I won't tell you who then." I murmured, searching his eyes, trying to figure out if this was the right thing to do.
He smiled at me, his genuine smile that I rarely see. "Anything else?"
"I think that's it."
"Have you... before?" he asked, his face becoming serious again. "I know you said not with him, but have you?"
"Once," I admitted. "He was one of my best friends. We were drunk at a party and it just happened. I liked him more than he liked me, of course. He went on and acted like it meant nothing, which it didn't to him. So, yeah. You?"
Hayden frowned but chose not to comment.
"Just with Carrie," he answered and I felt a flare of jealousy burn through my chest.
"That makes sense. You guys were together for a long time."
"Too long," he muttered, rubbing his face, before reaching out for his plate.
I let out a soft laugh.
"Oh, guess what," he said, his mouth full, his tone lightening.
"What?"
"I got a new suit, for the award ceremony. We're still going, right?"
"Oh, yeah," I suddenly said. "It's tomorrow night. I totally forgot about that."
"My nan bought it for me, after I told her we were going.” He smiled. “What colour is your dress? I have a few ties to choose from."
"Navy," I replied with a smile.
"Good, that works well with what I have."
"You're so cute," I teased, prodding his cheek, glad that the heaviness between us had diminished. "I can't wait to see you all suited up."
"You won't be able to keep your hands off me."
"I have a hard enough time already."
He smirked, leaning in and kissing my nose. "If you don't eat your pizza, I will."
I scowled, picking up another piece and taking a bite. "Over my dead body."
"That can be arranged."
I let out a laugh, pressing play on the T.V.
Even though I haven't told him the entire truth, I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders.
I think we're going to be okay.
***
I hear footsteps ascending up my stairs. Hayden and I exchanged a glance, just as my bedroom door swung open.
"If you think you can just- oh."
"Harvey?" I asked, quirking an eyebrow at him as he stood in my doorway awkwardly. "What are you doing here?"
"Er- um," he said, losing the original confidence he had. I know it is because Hayden is here. "Never mind. Bye."
"Harvey!" I called, scrambling to my feet.
He paused, looking back. "You yelled at me."
I rolled my eyes. "I didn't yell at you. I was just annoyed."
He averted his eyes and stared at the floor.
"Hey man," Hayden greeted randomly.
Harvey looked up, shock written on his face. "Um, hey?"
"I'll go," Hayden said to me. "I'll see you tomorrow. I'll pick you up?"
"Sure."
He drew me to him, before kissing my lips softly. As he walked past Harvey, he lightly punched his arm.
"See ya, man."
Harvey's mouth is hanging open as Hayden walked out.
"What the hell?" he spluttered. "He said hi... and you-you just kissed... What the hell?"
"Well, if you had bothered to hang out with me, I could have told you," I argued, folding my arms across my chest.
Harvey sighed. "I've been spending a lot of time with Caitlyn, haven't I?"
"Ya think?"
"You spend a lot of time with Hayden, too."
"We need to find a balance. I still need my best friend."
"Me too," he smiled. "I'm sorry that I ditched our Thursday night hangout."
"I'm sorry I snapped at you."
"Come here, you loser."
I walk into his arms and hug him tightly. After we let go, he wandered over to my bed and sat on the edge, leaning back onto his palms.
"So, you and Hayden are what, dating now or something?"
"Yeah," I nodded. "How do you feel about that?"
"Well, he just acknowledged me for the first time in his life, so that's a positive."
"He's becoming much more comfortable - more himself. I think you'll like him, once you get to know the real him."
"If you like him, I'm sure I will," he replied and I'm not sure if he is sincere or sarcastic. I chose to assume he is being sincere.
"You will," I beamed.
"If you're happy, I'm happy." he told me and this time I heard the genuine sincerity in his voice. "So, what are we doing tonight?"
"Really?" I squealed, a little embarrassed how excited I felt to spend some one-on-one time with my best friend.
"Really," he smiled. "Hamburgers?"
"Hamburgers." I agreed.
He got to his feet and I grinned as he wrapped an arm around my shoulder.
I had missed spending time, outside of school, with Harvey.
Things were looking up and finally, I felt free.