SERAPHINA'S POV
I'm petrified for the first few seconds, unable to say or do anything but stand and be horrified by the sight of what I've done to him.
I swore over and over again that this wouldn't happen, that no one else would get hurt, and yet I did it.
He groans painfully, pulling himself out of the indentation in the wall and dusting off the bits of wall debris clinging to his clothes before he looks at me again, more confused and shocked than ever.
I can see the wheels in his head turning, the questions brewing in his mind about what's going on, how and why I suddenly threw him off like that.
Questions I have no answer to, and worse, I don't think I can offer any because of the fear of what he might think of me.
I'm scared. I'm so scared, Artemis.
Hands rest on my shoulders from behind me now, and I freeze in place, feeling the instant chill of her presence, this lady, the guardian of my destiny.
"He's judging you right now," her voice echoes in my mind, whispering sinister words only I can hear.
Her words feel more like the truth than lies; I find myself unable to deny or push her away. I feel my body still shaking from my outburst, tears leaking from my eyes from hurting him.
"Look at the way he's looking at you. Wolves are naturally suspicious creatures. What do you think he's thinking? Probably about what you are, if you're a danger to him, wondering how the girl he loved could be such a monster," she continues to taunt in a low, appealing tone.
I look at him closer now, noticing how he hasn't said a word, only breathing hard and watching me cautiously, like an anomaly.
Like he really is scared I'd hurt him again.
"Stop it," I utter, shaking my head, denying her words and her twisted reality.
"To people like him, you are. A witch like you can only exist as a monster amongst them. You are his end after all."
I watch his face contort into hateful horror, without a shred of love left in the way he looks at me, almost like he's changed and he's not my Artemis.
I tremble, watching my greatest fear come to life in front of me.
"Stop it, please, stop it," I sob even more, begging her to end the torture.
He growls ferally in my face, baring his teeth that stick out even more, and his eyes turn red while taking slow, steady steps towards me. I can't move or run away, forced to stand there and wait for him to hurt me.
"Your souls are bonded, so you can't run away. He will remain by your side while you suck the very life out of him. Why do you think he's irresistibly drawn to you, Sera? He's unaware, but men often find themselves enamored with the very forces that could be their undoing. Like a moth to a flame, they're attracted to what's harmful - alcohol, drugs... and you, Seraphina. You are his beautiful, unwitting peril."
He leaps in the air, releasing his claws and wanting to slash at me with them. I flinch away, closing my eyes shut.
"STOP IT!" I yell, bracing for impact, until my body is shaken back into reality.
"Sera."
I open my eyes and Artemis is normal again, worried, hurt, but he's looking down at me like a cracked shard of glass, desperately and with love, unlike a second ago.
The memory terrifies me and I put distance between us, recoiling away from him, doubting if what I'm seeing right now is reality or just another vision.
"No... no, don't come any closer... I can't... I can't right now," I sob painfully.
I close my eyes, clasp my hands over my ears so I don't see it anymore, the horrifying sight I wish I could erase from my mind.
"Baby, look at me. Can you please look at me?" he begs, trying to get me to meet his eyes.
I can hear him getting closer and I panic again, feeling my own emotions grow more unstable.
"Baby..."
"You need to leave," I cut in before it can get worse, before I explode and hurt him again, managing to open my tear-stained eyes and look at him.
He shakes his head, begging me with his eyes, but I feel another outburst about to happen.
"Sera..."
"LEAVE!!" I yell against my control, and he flinches for a moment, biting his lower lip.
He stands there, watching me tremble, wanting to get closer, but I don't let him, out of fear, running my hands through my hair, pinching my skin just to be sure that this is my reality.
Until he turns around and leaves through the balcony silently, and I fall to my knees in a sob. I cry painfully into my palms, hating myself so desperately for the first time.
Hating this power inside me, hating what I am.
"There's no point in fighting it or pushing the wolf prince away. He will circle back to you," her voice echoes in my mind.
"Shut up!" I scream at her, so she stops talking to me, so she leaves, but she remains there, hovering like an annoying spirit.
"You don't know anything about me. I refuse to be one of you!" I deny her and my Astria blood.
Her face remains stoic, unchanging, as if my words mean nothing, her silence mocking me for thinking I could do anything.
So, I decide that I will.
I get to my feet, walking up to my drawer, grabbing a hand mirror, and slamming it against the counter until it breaks into pieces.
"What are you doing?" she asks.
I don't respond, grabbing a large shard and walking out of my room towards the general bathroom with all the mirrors, so I can see myself properly.
It's a short walk until I swing the door open and walk into the empty room with countless mirrors around, and I stare at my reflection.
My tattered hair from all the pulling I've done in the space of minutes, my swollen dark circles decorating my piercing green eyes. I look bad, I look like an actual monster.
It fuels my rage and anger, my desire to fix myself once and for all. I raise my shirt up and twist my back until I can see the tattoo on my back, the one that burnt its way to my flesh, a symbol of what I am and the beginning of all this madness.
"Don't do what I think you're about to do," she appears behind me again, reading my mind when she sees the sharp shard of glass clasped in my tight grip.
"You're not the only one who's crazy." I raise the glass to my skin and slash at it.
It rips through the flesh painfully, and I bite on my lip to muffle the sounds of pain that seek to escape my lips.
I do it over and over again, lacerating the skin in an attempt to peel the layer of flesh off me because maybe, just maybe, if it's gone, I could be normal again and I could love Artemis the way I want to.
Because nothing makes sense anymore.
I stab and peel at it, ripping the skin until the scar is lost in a jagged skin and a sea of red liquid rushing out from each tear.
There's a significant amount of blood dripping off me and onto the bathroom floor, sliding past my feet to the drainage by the time I'm done. I smile weakly at what I've done, without questioning the logic behind it.
Then the doors behind me slowly open and I hear a loud gasp that follows. I slowly turn because of the dizziness I now feel.
"Sera?" I look towards the door at someone I know, staring at me with wide, horrified eyes, and her face is blurred.
Not just her but everything else too.
I know her name; I'm about to say her name, until the blood loss gets to me and the world topples over before turning dark.