POV: Lyra
After I'd gone through the sections of my own interest, we still had time so I went over to other sections to see if there were data modules that my friends back at the station liked. When I realized there were, I also realized I'd made a mistake negotiating with Orion to only let me pay for mid-cycle consumption.
I gave my plan some thought before turning to my match and saying, "Orion, I've already got what I wanted. But I want to get a few titles for some friends back at the station." Orion was absorbing my words as he tried to decipher why I looked so uncomfortable saying that. I bit my lower lip uneasily before asking, "Can you let me pay for the ones I want to get for them? They're technically not for me."
Now Orion understood what I was attempting. He firmly insisted, pathways pulsing with determination, "No. Lyra, we had a deal. One meal. You've paid for it. I'm covering the ones you're getting for your friends as well. And didn't you just say that the Kaelari will eventually warm up to us. What better way to speed up that process than for a Lyrokan to get them gifts?"
I was thinking through what Orion just said as I muttered, "Huh. When you put it that way..."
"Wow. It's comforting to know that I won't necessarily lose. I guess the trick is to use your own words against you. Maybe I don't need a teacher after all." Orion thought aloud with a glint in his pathways.
I smirked and pressed my lips to his jawline before saying, "Don't push this, dearest." My gaze then turned soft and sincere, skin shifting to grateful blue. "And thank you. You really didn't have to—"
Orion stopped me with a sudden kiss on my lips, neural sparks exploding between us. When our lips parted, Orion bore his eyes into mine, his pathways pulsing intensely. "Don't tell me that I don't have to get gifts for the beings you care about. Know this, my love: if it makes you happy, I'll do it."
I was looking at him with those bright multifaceted eyes again as I uttered a shy but grateful 'thank you'. He kissed my forehead, sending more sparks through my neural pathways, before letting me continue looking at the titles. My last stop was the section for younglings.
Orion took a look and asked teasingly, "Are you going to make me pay for a gift for my 4-cycle-old competitor, sweetheart?"
I looked at him in confusion before registering that Orion was talking about Russell. I smiled. "Why, yes. If it makes me happy, you'll do it, won't you?"
He smirked before squeezing my waist, eliciting giggles that made my skin flash through happy colors. When I calmed down, I said more seriously, "I wasn't thinking about Russell. This is for Juan's 3-cycle-old offspring, Liam. The youngling is very different from his older siblings. He loves data modules, especially if it's anything to do with stellar formations and space. So I'm looking for something suitable since I'm already here. I suppose this one will do."
I held a colorful module with a cover filled with images of a transport vessel and planets against a backdrop full of stars.
Orion kissed my temple at my thoughtfulness. "It's okay if you want to get something for Russell too, Lyra. I was only joking earlier."
I simpered, skin shifting to knowing silver. "I know, Orion. But Russell doesn't strike me as a data-lover. He likes constructing things and assembling something new from components. This place won't get his attention until he's old enough to learn from the experts."
She's right, he thought to himself.
After I'd gotten that last module, the archive staff got a transport cart to move all my selections from the storage terminal to the counter. The staff even helped transport the modules into Orion's vehicle. After thanking them, we left La Bibliothèque Stellaire and headed to a nutrient station for evening consumption.
***
In the vehicle, Orion thought about how good I was with younglings. I seemed close to many younglings at my station, and I even knew Juan's offspring well enough to know what he liked. I'd only met Russell twice and could already tell the youngling's preference. He wondered if I ever thought of being a mother myself, and Orion was contemplating how best to ask his question. "Lyra?"
"Hm?"
He took a breath, his pathways flickering with nervousness. "What I'm going to ask is probably going to be..." he sighed before continuing, "...too personal for this early stage. Just tell me it's personal if it is. I'll understand. Uh..." He ran his hand through his dark hair while the other remained on the navigation control. "Do you imagine having your own offspring someday?"
I snorted, skin flashing to amused gold. "Orion, from how nervous and uncomfortable you look, I thought you were going to ask about the number of beings I've interfaced with in the past."
Orion thanked the cosmos he'd stopped outside the nutrient station already when I said that. The number of beings I'd interfaced with in the past? He was quite upset and even jealous that I had intimate relationships with someone else, probably before all the psychic bond rejections. Kaelari only start feeling the pull of the bond when they reach maturity at twenty cycles. Many wouldn't wait to get into a relationship despite knowing that their partners may not turn out to be their match.
Orion knew that making me feel bad about past relationships would just be unfair. We hadn't even met that time. I was very attractive now in my late twenties, imagine what I was like in my younger cycles. He himself might have been entranced by me.
I took in his saddened look, pathways dimming to melancholy blue, and said, "Orion, just to be clear, I've never interfaced with anyone. And yes, I did imagine having my own offspring one day but I..."
He smashed his lips on mine even before I finished speaking, neural sparks cascading through both our systems. He deepened our kiss with each brush. I pulled his face away and asked in concern, "Orion, you seem a little scared. What's wrong? What happened?"
He whispered breathlessly, "I love you."
"I know, Orion. But what's wrong?" I asked, still not following.
Orion still felt insecure, so he took both my hands in his and pressed kisses to my fingers, neural energy pulsing between us. "It's just... For a moment, I thought you had a serious past relationship and I wasn't sure if I was able to compete with that. I just... don't want to be less than perfect for you."
I muttered to myself, "Oh cosmos, that joke went too far." I then took my hands from Orion and cupped his face as I apologized. "Orion, darling, I am so sorry. I shouldn't have said that. How it came out was entirely wro—mmph"
Orion's lips were back on mine. He didn't want my apology. He just wanted to be the one I would ultimately choose to be with, the match I would ultimately choose to make me happy for the rest of my functioning cycles. Orion only let go of my lips when I needed to process oxygen. He buried his face in my neck and sought comfort in my psychic signature.
After catching my breath, I asked in worry, "Orion, you okay?"
"Mm." He responded as he continued absorbing my signature from my neck.
"Are you sure?" I was still not convinced.
Orion nuzzled my neck, his neural pathways warm against my skin. "I felt a little of the insecurity you mentioned last night. It malfunctions. And I doubt what I felt was anywhere close to what you had to handle. I don't know how you do it, star-heart."
I was even more lost. "Orion, why would you have to feel insecure? Being in your position, you'd never had anyone implicitly telling you or even suggesting that you're worthless. And I told you before that no one sees me the way you see me. There is zero need to be insecure."
He whimpered, his inner Lyrokan expressing distress through our bond as his arms wrapped around my waist. "You're wrong, Lyra. Lots of beings see you that way. You just don't see them. But I see you this way the most so you can't pick someone else, okay? Please don't pick someone else. It's not fair."
I groaned in annoyance, my skin flashing irritated orange, and my hands gently removed his head from my neck for my frustrated eyes to lock with his fearful ones. "Orion, what are you talking about? You're my match. Why would I be picking someone else? I'm with you. I've never been with anyone intimately before Sebastian Cummings. And we both know how that one ended so..."
"Did you two exchange oral contact?" Orion asked.
I shook my head, skin shifting to honest silver. "We never got close enough for me to be comfortable to share that kind of thing with him. It was difficult to fully trust him and his family. And before you ask, no. He didn't analyze my psychic signature like how you've just done either."
"Did he make contact with you at all?"
"Orion, this really isn't necessary, it's..."
"I want to know."
I sighed, resigned. "Just my hand. You know, like the usual formal gesture. It really isn't anyth—"
I gasped in utter shock as Orion was pressing his lips to my hands to the point of almost creating suction that I stopped mid-sentence. I had to snatch my hands away from his tight grip before holding his head up to face me.
When our eyes locked, I said in a low, firm tone, "Orion, I'm with you. There isn't anyone else for me. I don't see anyone else, okay? Calm down. There's no need to feel insecure. I'm with you, okay? I'm with you."
He smiled at my response, pathways brightening from dark worry to relieved purple. The fear in his eyes diminished. Orion then tried to move up to my face to kiss my lips but I held his head in place. "We should get inside before it gets too late for evening nutrients, darling."
"But I want a kiss." He whined like a youngling, his pathways pulsing petulantly.
I smiled, my skin shifting to affectionate pink, and pressed a kiss on his lips before saying, "There. Now, let's go, my Emperor."