Aviva
“You know, there’s this thing called sleep, and it’s fantastic.” Freya tilts her face toward the pocket of sunlight dancing over us. “You just lay down, shut your eyes, and then you wake up several hours later feeling refreshed. You should try it sometime.”
I throw her a cutting look as I pick at the grass. “I did sleep.”
“Well, you look like shit, so I know you didn’t sleep well. How many days has it been? Three? Four nights without sleeping? I’m shocked you’re able to function.”
I let out a breath and watch the scene playing out before us on the shore of the shallow, calm creek. Someone built a little wall of rocks just past the bridge, creating a man-made eddy. Shoshannah shrieks with laughter as she splashes with three other little girls her age, all of them soaked to the neck.
Freya smiles, her blue eyes creasing as she watches Shosh. “I remember being ten.”
“So do I.” I smile despite the exhaustion weighing me down. I didn’t sleep well last night. I curled up in Ryan’s bed, surrounded by his scent. I laid there alone, unable to relax, listening to the new sounds of a new village, unsure what was a threat and what was normal.
At some point, sleep did reach for me, and I let it sweep me away, but I woke up on the floor in front of the couch, half covered by the blanket Ryan had been using, while he slept soundly on the couch totally oblivious to the fact that I’d likely wandered in there seeking the company of someone, anyone, to get me through the night.
I shake my head to try to banish the memory and close my eyes for a moment, breathing in the soft, clean scent of the flowers blooming all around us.
“I’m a little worried about you,” Freya says to me.
“You shouldn’t be. I’m fine.”
“You look so tired, Aviva. I know this is stressful but–”
“I’m fine.” I try to assure her, but she doesn’t look convinced. She sighs and looks past me as two lean wolves come rushing down the road toward the village, bursting through the pockets of sunlight left behind by the thunderstorm that rolled through the valley last night. They run right past us at an insane rate of speed.
The girls playing in the creek stop splashing for a moment to watch them but quickly go back to their game.
“Those must be the scouts returning from Endova,” Freya says. We turn to watch them speed into the village proper. Freya glances at Shoshannah. “You should go find out what happened. I’ll stay with her.”
I nod, wiping my hands on the fabric of the pale pink cotton dress I changed into this morning. It’s very pretty, but it's a little big on me. The straps keep sliding off, revealing my shoulders. It’s warm this morning though, compared to last night. I slide my feet back into my sandals and walk along the road into the village proper and see the door to the pack house is open, and male voices drift outside.
I step inside without knocking. Jacob, Ryan, and James are standing with the scouts, now in their human forms and dressed. The scouts are drinking water, panting.
Ryan is talking in low tones to Jacob when he sees me walk in. For a split second, I swear his eyes soften with relief, maybe even excitement that I’m here, but I know I’m just hallucinating from lack of sleep. “Next week, then,” Ryan says in conclusion, nodding in farewell to the men standing in the empty pack house, and walks toward me.
My lips part, questions dancing on my tongue, but Ryan gives me a smirk and leads me back into the sun.
“Everything is fine in Endova. Your father knows now that Shoshannah is here, and next week, once the spring storms are over and the creek is less temperamental, she’ll be returning home.”
“Oh.” I clear my throat, relieved but also a little on edge because of how close he’s standing to me right now.
“So, everything is fine now,” he says with a bit of a sigh as he squints through the suddenly blinding sun peeking through the clouds. “Which means you can actually sleep–”
“Why is everyone so concerned about that?” I ask sharply.
Ryan looks down at me, the corner of his mouth ticking up in that cocky, boyish smile that makes me want to punch him–or kiss him–I don’t know. My fatigued mind seems to favor both possibilities, unfortunately. “Because you haven’t slept since we returned from the hunt. It’s been days since then.”
“I slept last night.”
“No, you didn’t.”
“How do you know? Were you watching me?”
“I woke up early this morning, cold, wondering what happened to the blanket I brought onto the couch with me and found you with it, curled up on the floor beneath me.” There’s a teasing glint to his tone that sends a shiver up my spine.
“I’m not used to sleeping alone.” I whirl and walk away, my cheek burning red, and curse at myself. I need to lock myself into the bedroom tonight, apparently. I don’t question why he won’t share a bed with me or why it bothers me. I should be grateful, right? I’m sure some women leave their villages, and their new husbands don’t leave them alone whatsoever. Mine doesn’t seem to want much to do with me, and that… that should feel better than it does.
“Aviva!” he calls out.
I halt in my tracks, halfway back to the creek where Freya is still sitting in the sun. I turn to look at Ryan over my shoulder. “What?”
“Tonight, after dinner, I’ll take you to see the valley. We can shift. I think you could use the run.” With that, he turns to go back into the pack house, and I huff a breath and go back to sitting beside Freya, who smirks at me but doesn’t ask any questions.
* * *
Dahlia looks exceedingly uncomfortable as she sits down with us at the end of a long, wooden table. She’s a bit flushed and puffy as she picks at her food with her fork, pushing a grain of rice around her plate.
It’s been a strange day. I’m not sure what to do here, honestly. Freya has taken Shoshannah under her wing while I try to adjust. I haven’t seen Ryan since he told me my father was informed of Shoshannah’s whereabouts. I’m sure he has a lot to do as Alpha. My father was always busy as patriarch, and I’m sure it’s one and the same, but still.
I feel like I’m floating in a directionless body of water, unsure how to move, how to act, or what to think.
Freya and Shosh are taking to village life, however.
“Shoshannah made some friends today. See?” she says, pointing to the group of little girls playing in one corner of the pack house. Shoshannah is with them, bright eyed and oblivious to the strife she’s caused. I haven’t had the heart nor the energy to talk to her about it yet, and she’s avoiding me in turn, likely knowing the fight coming her way.
“She’s settling in better than I am, I suppose,” I say, accepting a bowl of salad with what I think might be kale and spinach, as well as roasted nuts and dried berries. I give myself a huge scoop and look at Dahlia, meaning to pass the bowl to her next, but she flushes again, closing her eyes.
She doesn’t look so good. I look down the table where I’d seen Ryan sitting with her mate last night, but neither man is anywhere to be found.
“Dahlia,” Freya says lightly, reaching across the table to rest her hand on the woman’s wrist. “I think you should go home and lie down.”
Dahlia nods wordlessly and allows Freya to help her upright.
I shift my position on the bench, unsure what to do. My only experience with pregnant women, especially one in obvious labor, was my–my mother.
A pang of grief lights in my heart, sending a dull ache through my body. Freya calls out to Shoshannah as she leaves, and Shoshannah follows, leaving me totally alone at the end of the table.
So, I pick at my salad, suddenly unable to eat. I notice movement at another table, however. A group of young women are talking amongst themselves and occasionally throwing glances over their shoulders at me. I noticed them last night, too. They’re the same women I saw doing laundry in the creek.
No one, other than Dahlia and James, has spoken to me yet. In all fairness, I haven’t made much of an attempt to introduce myself, and Ryan hasn’t either, so….
One of them rises, laughing with her companions before smoothing her dark, glossy hair away from her face and striding over to my table. Her group watches her, talking in low whispers as she struts over to where I’m sitting and smoothly sits down, propping her chin on her fist.
“Uhm, hello,” I say, feeling more than a little odd. Her dark eyes scan mine.
“So, you’re Aviva.” She smiles, kindly, I think. “Our new Luna, right?”
“I believe so.”
Her smile widens. “I’m Natalie. I thought I should probably introduce myself since our Alpha hasn’t publicly announced his… marriage.” She throws her hair over her shoulder and glances down the table, probably looking for the man in question. “When Jacob came back to Silverhide in a fuss, we all thought Alpha Ryan died or something. Turns out, he just has a wife now.”
I’m not sure what to say or think, but I know women. There’s a lot of young, competitive women in Endova with the same glimmer of cattiness in their eyes that Natalie has now.
I roll my shoulders before tightening them and fix Natalie with a look. “Ryan has been busy, as you can imagine, after coming home from a successful spring hunt. Did you need him for something?”
Her eyes shine for a moment before she shakes her head. “No. Like I said, I just wanted to introduce myself. As our new Luna, you’re probably going to want some woman in your inner circle to help run things, you know.”
“Oh, thank you for offering your services.” My voice is clipped but edges on sincere, which is enough for her. Her smile widens, but this is some kind of standoff. I don’t know this woman at all, which makes it different to determine what her motive is right now. Did she really come to introduce herself, to get into her Luna’s good graces, or is she hoping to stir up drama?
Part of me hopes it’s the latter, just to give me something to focus on.
“You know,” she laughs, shaking her head, “I just can’t believe Alpha Ryan is married. It’s so strange to us. He’s such a–such a–oh, what’s the word I’m looking for?”
“I have no idea.” I take a bite of my salad.
She frowns a bite at my bored tone. “He’s just never one to be in a relationship.”
She wants me to ask what she means so she can tell me something sordid about my new husband, but I’m not going to give her the satisfaction. I know men as well as I know women. I know the cocky smile, the posturing, and sharp wit likely won Ryan any girl he ever wanted. He’s the most handsome man I’ve ever seen, and being the Alpha of a pack with so many young women of marrying age means he’s probably enjoyed his fair share of attention from them.
Maybe even from Natalie.
I take another bite of my salad and smile around my fork before setting it down, clearing my throat, and fixing her with a look that's both kind, and knowing, dripping with ulterior motives. “Perhaps Alpha Ryan finally found what he was looking for in Endova, and that was me.” Another smile, with teeth this time.
Natalie’s frown grows into something edged with faint rage, but she contains it in a practiced manner. “I guess we’ll see, won’t we?”
I rise, leaving her at the table, and walk out into the night, buzzing with nervous energy.
Admittedly, I don’t like the notion that Ryan lays it on thick with other women when he can barely look in my direction without either glaring at me or looking at me like I’m something so fragile that if he touches me, I’ll break.
I’m supposed to be his wife. I’m supposed to be the wife of an Alpha, for Goddess’ sake. He hasn’t even so much as kissed me.
I huff a breath and look around to distract myself from the conflicting emotions fighting for majority. Ryan said he’d take me for a run tonight, but he’s nowhere to be seen, and I don’t see Freya or Shoshannah, either. So, I go back to his house to change into my clothes from Endova. I’ll take myself running. I’ll shift and go hunt to clear my head. Maybe then I’ll be able to sleep.
I throw open the door to go inside, cursing under my breath. An intake of air and a sharp hiss of pain greets me, followed by Ryan’s shadow crossing over me in the faint moonlight.
He rubs his jaw, frowning at me.
“Did you just get hit with the door?” I laugh. “You didn’t hear me walking across the porch?”
“You threw it open hard enough for it to come off the hinges.” He roughly rubs the side of his face as he steps past me onto the porch. “I was just coming to get you. Are you ready to go?”
“I was going to change, first.”
“It doesn’t matter. We’re not going that far. There’s clothing caches all over the place.” He adjusts a black strap across his chest, and I notice the strange object hanging from it.
“Is that the camera?” I ask, the word sounding strange on my tongue.
He looks into my eyes, running his tongue along his lower lip like he’s debating something, then nods. “Come on,” he says, turning from me. “We’re burning moonlight.”