Proserpina
We flew out of the US in a week's time.
The children had been subdued, not really understanding what was happening. I sat them down and explained that I needed to work for a while in Japan. That it was important for me. Ria interrupted me, her lower lip thrust out and quivering, her little face hot and pink.
'Why can't you work from here? Like you used to?'
And then, her eyes glittering as the tears spilt, she went on, on a half sob, "I want my Pappa.'
Piers was almost in tears too. I sighed and stood up, reaching for Claude who took it upon himself to begin wailing at that moment.
The maids stood by, guarded and expressionless, while Sandy watched from a corner, her arms folded. I could feel the censure in the air.
"Was I wrong in wanting to live my life?' I thought angrily.
It was Lucien who came to my rescue.
He spent all afternoon and the evenings at the house, with the children. His eyes had a hollow look in them, a bleakness that bothered me. He gathered Ria in his strong arms and said in his raspy voice, "Poppet, let Mumma do what she needs to do.'
The twins slept with him in his large bed these days, and he made sure that he returned from the club before their dinner time. The Storytelling sessions were also a sacred Father-children time when they would cuddle up on either side of him, as he read. I sometimes went to check on them, But somehow, I felt like an intruder. Even little Piers had now thawed enough to sleep, leaning on his father's broad shoulder when he dozed off during the story session.
To say that I was beginning to feel like the Scarlet Woman, would be an understatement.
***
Lucien
The deep love Lucien felt for his children was something that he had never experienced in his life. It humbled him. He wanted to rush home from the Club every evening, to be with them, to listen to Ria talking non-stop, to see Piers with his shy, toothy smile, and to cup, little Claude in his strong arms.
And of course, to be close to his wife. Motherhood became her, he thought, his manhood reacting to the thought of her magnificent body. She had filled out, she had become a woman, with her full figure and the aura of love she seemed to radiate. The confidence in her gait, in the way she spoke to her associates and to the staff-yes, she had become a woman to be respected.
He would watch her, surreptitiously, from the balcony of his bedroom as she did her yoga in the morning. The fluidity of her movements kept him enthralled although his c*ck reacted to her for a different reason. But he held himself back. He needed to give her the space to think; he would not crowd her. His restraint marvelled at him. Earlier, he would have shot down her entreaties and banned her from leaving. Now, in his new perception of his passion for her, he knew that he had to give her the chance to explore. And wait for her to return to him.
***
Proserpina
The weather in Japan was welcoming, and the people from the new Centre who turned up at the airport to collect us were warm and polite. Although the kids were slightly jet-lagged, they insisted on talking to Lucien the moment they landed. And he answered immediately. Again a pang of self-criticism swept through me; Was I actually doing the right thing?
Sandy Burns, who had accompanied us on Lucien's firm orders, scooped up baby Claude and smiled at me, reassuringly. "It's ok,' she whispered and I smiled tremulously. Lord knows I was missing my man immensely too. I thought of how we had parted. *** The kids had been crying, as we stood in the doorway, all packed and ready to leave. Schwartz had volunteered to come to the airport to make sure we were alright. He had given me a quizzical look but said nothing.
Ria had wept, great heaving sobs as Lucien held her, hugging her to his powerful chest, lowering his face into her hair. Setting her down gently, he had said solemnly, drawing Piers closer too as he said, "Son, you take care of your Mumma, ok?'
The little boy's mouth trembled, but he nodded his head seriously. Lucien enfolded him in a bear hug and punched his fist, making Piers feel important, inciting Ria's envy. "Now you are the man of the family, son.' He growled, sliding a sidelong look at me. He stepped forward and taking baby Claude in his arms, he kissed the baby's forehead gently, lovingly. To my surprise, Claude opened his eyes and then seemed to wink at his father. I gurgled with laughter, although I was close to tears.
Lucien handed the baby to a teary-eyed Beatrice who hugged him, squeezing him, her tears flowing down her wrinkled face. She was staying back. Turning to me, he said gruffly,' Take care.'
Without another word, he turned and re-entered the house leaving us standing forlornly, looking after him. I watched him, longing for his strong arms to be wrapped around me.
But then, I turned determinedly and went down the steps to the waiting car which would take us to the airport. Danielle and Grace had also been at the airport. Grace had hugged me, saying softly, "It'll be good.'
Danielle had stepped forward, speaking in a 'voice that was rough with emotion: 'Come back soon, d'you hear!' and then, sniffing she added," Boss will be like a bear with a sore head. Can't take it again.' I smiled shakily. I longed to be back home with Lucien and we had not even left! * I was immersed in work soon after we reached Japan, it was challenging but fulfilling. Yet when I lay down to sleep at night, I remained wide awake.
We were in a beautiful province of Japan, calm and peaceful. The view from my small cottage was breath-taking, the hills in the distance, the fields spread out as far away as I could see. Tranquil. But the churning in me made me long to bury the hatchet and return to my lover. Only my obstinacy held me back. Lucien should make the move this time, I told myself as I tossed and turned, cuddling little Claude who lay beside me.