‘Hurry up, shorty, if you want to catch the bakery before it closes for lunch.’ Rose pushed Abby out of the cottage door into the bright sunshine, heading for her car. They had spent the morning packing her artwork for the courier and sketching flowers in the garden. Abby loved fine art as much as Rose, and they were working on a collage for her studio.
‘Oooh, well, move then. I have a severe craving for cupcakes, and I promised Duncan I would save him some for later.’ Abby grinned at Rose’s eyeroll. Abby had been absent a lot lately due to her blossoming romance with the farm boy from the dance. Rose could only grab time with her sporadically, but it did make concealing her relationship with Rob a little easier.
‘What does your brother think of your new love life?’ Rose pressed when they were settled in the car, and Abby smiled wickedly.
‘What he doesn’t know won’t kill him.’ Abby chuckled and pulled her bag onto her lap to check for her purse, pulling it out triumphantly and waving it around. ‘You know he offered to take me to college this morning. What’s that all about? Normally he’s up at dawn and married to his work, and you barely see him. Lately, he seems to be around a lot more, although he didn’t believe me that today was my day off.’
Rose’s phone vibrated before she had even pulled off, and her mother’s face flashed on the screen. She tried not to react, just slid it into her bag at her side and carried on manoeuvring out of the car park.
She had been avoiding her mother’s calls lately or passing her off with excuses that she was busy. The truth was, she couldn’t lie to her, and her mother would know something was up. They hadn’t spoken properly in weeks. She had no clue what to tell them about Rob, which made things much more complicated.
‘Avoiding mummy still?’ Abby cut in with a knowing look and leaned back to clip her belt. They had pulled out onto the road, and both girls immediately rolled down the windows to let the breeze in. It was another surprisingly scorching day and shaping to be the best summer.
‘Who said I’m avoiding my mum?’ She lied and crossed her toes childishly, accelerating as they passed the Manor opening. She still got nervous near that entrance.
‘Come on, I’ve seen you blank that phone several times when your mother's beautiful face is on screen. What are you avoiding her for? I thought you were close.’ Abby was curious at the best of times. Rose’s nickname for her was ‘Nosey mare’ as she was forever prodding for information. It only made Rose sure that Abby knew something about Rob, as she never broached that subject.
‘It’s nothing, she just calls a lot, and she is just a bit overprotective.’ Rose hated the white lie, hated that she was yet again bluffing her way out of the truth with Abby, but she couldn’t tell her the truth. It had gone on too long, and even if she could, she didn’t know how to tell her now. Abby would be crushed that she had been kept out of the loop. That Rose and Rob had been sleeping together for over a month and had never told her.
Abby flicked through her phone and bumped on a tune loudly.
‘This is my new fave.’ She beamed Rose’s way and started gyrating in her seat and singing along as they pulled up to the town sign, and Rose followed the familiar route to the café car park. It looked unusually full as she circled for a space, noting a couple of tourist buses nearby and headed back out to the road for the next car park at the museum.
Tourist season was starting, and the village would begin to get busy. She hadn’t been looking forward to the invasion in her corner of paradise, but thankfully it would only last the summer.
Finding a space outside the museum was easy, practically at the door. Rose couldn’t help but spot Rob’s car parked near the entrance, and that familiar pang hit her in the stomach. He was here... With her. She knew he sometimes had business with the museum. Rob was a benefactor, after all. She didn’t expect to turn around as she slid out to come face to face with him, walking towards her. As they approached, Morag was at his side, strolling too close beside him.
‘Morning’ He smiled towards her, aware of eyes on them and Abby’s usual presence. His face was a picture of blankness and giving nothing away; he was always a little too good for Rose’s liking at this causal indifference. She assumed it was honed with years of dating women quietly. She smiled tightly, trying not to look at the redhead, the figure-revealing dress she was sporting today, or how she was leaning too close to Rob’s side. That air of ownership.
Abby slid out of the car and greeted Rob with a sisterly hug. They always publicly showed affection to one another in small ways, highlighting their bond and making Rose envy it.
Okay, envy it a lot. She longed for the days when he could be that way with her in the open.
‘Where you girls off to today then?’ His eyes kept coming to rest on Rose and then shifting again. He was only too aware of how Morag was watching intently, and Morag smiled at the two women in her usual fake hospitable way. A seasoned pro of social etiquette when faced with members of the public or strangers, she played her part very well. Cool, calm and poised, as though nothing more was going on behind those narrowed green eyes, her manner giving nothing away. Today she was dressed for a party, even though it was around ten am, and Rose felt plain in her white summer dress and sandals with her loose waving hair around her shoulders.
‘The bakery for Abby’s daily intake of cupcakes, then maybe the beach for a walk with Muffin. We’re celebrating the conclusion of my commission today.’ Rose was trying to sound light, trying not to focus on the hard lines of his body under his shirt and linger in the memories of what he had done to her last night. Her face must have betrayed a hint of what she thought as she caught the change of shade in his eyes and the briefest pause of his attention on her mouth. She saw the familiar glint of lust as he cleared his throat, pushing it away. Her body was always so aware of his every tiny movement.
‘Congrats, well done for getting them done so quickly. Try not to drown my sister while you’re there. I know how irritating she can be.’ He was trying to lighten the mood, and Abby sucker punched him lightly, a scowl on that pretty face. She had been glaring at Morag openly until that point, oblivious to all the passed looks between her brother and best friend.
‘Screw you, asshole.’ Abby laughed and ducked as he tried to catch her in a headlock. Rose watched them with a smile moving across her face, always warmed by the bond of siblings. Morag looked cold and bored as she glared at the sparring pair who were now dancing about, then gave Rose a quick once over with a disapproving air. Rose stiffened and tried her best not to react.
Abby was trying to take another mock jab, and Rob kept her at arm’s length, teasing her and calling her names, his hand on his sister’s head. He expertly ducked and dived from flailing limbs while she was calling him every name she could think of that would insult, but it only made him laugh louder. That unguarded smile caused Rose to warm up in places that flushed her skin. It was in these moments when Rob lost the look of the mature businessman and looked every bit the young, carefree twenty-nine-year-old, years slipping away with a change of facial expression, that only made her want him more.
‘It’s a lovely day, isn’t it?’ Rose tried with the other woman, her heart beating fast and the awkwardness of being left here to stand silently facing her. Trying to drag her attention away from how hot Rob looked, fooling around with his sister so childishly.
‘Hmm, I guess.’ Morag didn’t look at her. She just checked her watch for the umpteenth time and sighed loudly. She was concentrating on sending facial signals to Rob to move, making it clear she had little interest in the annoying brunette standing three feet away. Rose could feel her irritation rising. This woman was not easy to warm to, and how she looked possessively at Rob made her temper simmer.
‘Going anywhere nice yourself?’ She pressed. She was trying to make an effort. Maybe if she endeared herself a little to this woman, it would make things easier. On Rob. On her. Perhaps if she formed a friendship, then things would move along faster.
‘Rob’s taking me to a business brunch for the museum.’ She said drily, closed off, offering no more information and shutting her down. She waved a hand at the pair, now several feet away, to attract his attention. Rob had Abby hanging upside down over his shoulder, screaming for dear life and wrinkling out his sky-blue shirt and navy trousers.
‘I see. Well, have a nice brunch.’ Rose interjected with her friendly smile and was met with a mask of deadpan indifference. Morag just ignored her. Rose gritted her teeth, clamped her mouth shut with the temper threatening to pour out and focused her eyes on that gorgeous six-foot hunk instead. He always simmered her jets.
He was obviously in a good mood. Rose knew why; they had not slept much last night. The hot, humid night kept them both awake, and they had filled the hours with some acrobatic exercise. He had tested out every available surface in her cottage that he could prop her on, and she baulked at where he was getting his energy this morning. He looked anything but tired.
He had been in a lust-hungry mood and could not get enough of her, no matter how many times he had her. It was one of those rare nights when he had stayed until morning, and his phone had not rung even once. They had talked, made love and held one another repeatedly until sun up and he had to leave for work. She was tired this morning, and her body ached, but it had all been worth it. The memories fueling her through today and longing for later when they had arranged to meet out of town for dinner.
Rob finally dropped Abby back on her feet and hauled her under his arm, planting a kiss on top of her head. She was still struggling and aiming elbow jabs at his side, but he caught them expertly. He was faster and stronger than Abby and made it look easy to control the fiery demon.
‘We have got to get going, Rob!’ Morag’s voice was tight and controlled, but a mere hint of temper fraying at the edges. She was bored with the company and wanted him alone once more.
‘Yeah, sure. Hate to love you and leave you ladies, but we have a meeting.’ He looked directly at Rose as he said, ‘love you’ lingeringly, his eyes glinting, and the tiny hint of a smile tugged his mouth subtly, sending a small shiver internally through Rose’s pelvis. Anticipating later when she could be alone with him. ‘Behave yourselves.’ He walked forward between Morag and Rose as though making to leave so that his body brushed her lightly, his fingertips gently tracing down the inner skin of her arm and wrist. A small brief touch, concealed by his body but sending a thousand tingles through Rose like a shockwave, with his eyes catching hers, that now familiar look of longing in that shielded expression. She saw Abby lifting her attention their way with a narrowed look and moved away from him quickly. Rose’s face heated, and she cursed herself for the inability to act.
These last few weeks, she had been learning to read him a little better, recognise the tiny signs and looks that he rarely gave away for moments like this, when his actions made her feel insecure.
‘We shall!’ Abby butted in, the strangest expression behind those eyes, and she pushed her brother in the back as though telling him to hurry and leave. He batted at her head with his hand before leaning down and hitting her with a kiss on the cheek.
‘Have a nice day.’ Rose said quietly to him, not Morag and met his eyes with a smile.
‘You too.’ He turned a last quick look at Rose and placed a hand on Morag's back, guiding her toward his parked car. Rose tried not to watch him go, tried not to let that bubble inside that was growing to affect her, but she was watching a little too intensely and aware she was frowning.
‘I feel the same way about her.’ Abby butted into her thoughts and nudged against her. ‘Slutty freak... Who dresses that way at ten in the morning?’ She laughed and turned, yanking Rose by the wrist and not waiting for a response as she hauled her into the bakery.
* * *
Rose pulled up to the restaurant in her little car and stopped, parking easily in the dark but sitting a moment to check her hair and makeup with her visor light. She was meeting him here as planned, yet that heavy weight in her stomach was stubborn and refusing to go away tonight. All day it had weighed on her, her mind, flitting back to her situation with Rob repeatedly and causing deep swirling nausea, making it near impossible to relax.
She saw his car pull up in her rear-view mirror, smoothly reversing into a space across from her and waited patiently. They had gotten into a routine of meeting in car parks, always late at night, always out of town, and Rose couldn’t help the lump that formed in her throat. The feeling that this was what they were, at the rate things were progressing, she couldn’t see an end to this either.
He wrapped her window lightly moments later, pulling her out of her head and then opened her door to help her with a hand.
‘Hey, there, gorgeous.’ He pulled her against him and sunk a kiss on her that helped push away all the tension and upset. Normally, it worked to eradicate it, but it only softened the heaviness tonight. His tongue flicked against hers lightly, bringing out the desire to be naked with him again.
‘Hey, you. How was your brunch?’ She asked a little too frostily when he finally released her. She breathed in heavily, swallowed down and smiled to cover how she said it. He narrowed his eyes on her briefly before turning her to walk with an arm around her shoulders, obviously dismissing it.
‘Boring... Long. How was the beach?’ His mouth found her temple as they walked, and a small shoulder squeeze was all she needed to let the mood go. She would focus on being with him tonight, enjoy the food and his company and look forward to being alone later.
‘Tiring. We stayed till mid-afternoon, and then I went home for a nap. You exhausted me.’ She smiled up at him a little easier, being released as he opened the restaurant door and gently guided her in.
‘I intend to do the same tonight.’ He winked and, this time, looped her fingers in his to pull her towards the maître de.
‘You’re staying tonight?’ Rose blinked at him questioningly, knowing that his staying the night before usually meant they wouldn’t get to spend another full night together for at least a few days. Two in a row had almost become impossible.
‘I’ll try to.’ He winked, hushing her as the man approached them with a smile to ask for the reservation name. Rose looked away, tears stinging her eyes, knowing that this wasn’t how it should feel. That being in love and a relationship shouldn’t always be so uncertain. She wanted definite plans, no broken nights and stolen moments. She wanted a good life and relationship with him, and the way things were going was causing all sorts of doubts about their future together. None of this she could voice, of course, for fear Rob would end things like he had originally wanted until Morag could cope with Rob having a girlfriend. Rose sighed and followed him as they were shown to their table. Pushing it all down and plastering a bright smile on her face to cover all of her heartaches.
‘You look stunning tonight. You always look beautiful, but especially so in that dress.’ He smiled at her when they were seated, his eyes running over her appreciatively. Rose could only smile and smooth down her skirt, eyes avoiding his as she got a handle on her internal tears. ‘Your sister chose it... Figured I would look good in aqua.’ She smiled, pleased that her new fifties style dress was a hit. Always been a lover of vintage. She slowly pulled the menu towards her and used it to divert from those smoky eyes.
‘It won’t be like this always.’ His soft tone picked up her gaze to meet his, that frown and gentle expression telling her that he had sensed her upset. Knew she was having a hard time nowadays. ‘I told Morag I was dating, that there had been women in the last few years...... She didn’t take it so well but didn’t erupt.’ He watched her intently, not making a move to pick up his menu.
‘Does this mean things will start to change?’ She enquired warily, her heart afraid to hope for anything so soon.
‘Not yet. I want to get her used to the idea that there is someone... Before she finds out, it’s you. Before we start walking around publicly and put it in her face, I know this is shitty on you, baby, but I am trying to do the right thing and protect both of your feelings.’ He frowned, finally lifting his menu and opening it quickly, not reading it.
‘How long will that take? What if she never accepts it?’ Again, this same old fact, over and over in Rose’s head. The what ifs. Her deflated tone couldn’t conceal her doubt.
‘Rose, look at me.’ He pulled her to his gaze once more, a smile softly on that perfect mouth. ‘I love you. I will do whatever it takes to make this as fast as possible, but I also can’t rush things. If she harmed herself because of us, it would affect us, affect our happiness. I know you don’t get why I am this way with her, but there is truly nothing there but friendship. I have known her for fifteen years, been her only friend for most of that time and been the only one who has managed to help her. Her story is complicated and heartbreaking, and I care about her the way I care about my sister. I’m sorry. I’m not the kind of asshole who can push her aside, even for you. I want her to be happy too.’ He reached out and caught Rose’s hand in his, pulling it towards him slightly, so he could rest easy and smooth her fingers with this thumb. ‘I don’t want you to push her aside. I get that you care. I love that you care the way you do... It’s just so ... Frustrating!’ Rose sighed. ‘It’s not exactly a run-of-the-mill situation. Anyone on the outside looking in would never understand any of this.’
‘I only need you to understand and not give up on me.’ He watched her, waiting for a response, but Rose could only sigh heavily again.
‘Look. I’m not going anywhere. Let’s eat and go. I just want to be wrapped up with you and forget about her for tonight.’ She pulled away from his fingers and lifted her menu again, scanning the food and trying to pick something before her mood took yet another weird turn. Her menu was whipped out of her hand, making her jump, and she was faced with him standing right beside her, hand held out.
‘Come on. We can grab a takeaway on the way home... I want to be alone now, not later.’ He looked serious, gaze intense, and she didn’t hesitate. He reached out to be pulled out of her seat, his arm coming around her as he ushered her back in the direction they had come in. He waved the waiter away with a smile and apology and dumped a few bills on the stand as we passed by.
‘Appetite is not for food.’ He grinned at the other man, getting a smile in return and a knowing look as he pulled her towards the exit. Rose blushed furiously and looked down at the floor in complete mortification, hissing his name in embarrassment.
As they got to the car park, Rose went to pull away and head for her car, but he pulled her back to him.
‘I meant what I said in there... I love you. More than anything in the world. Trust me that this isn’t all there is.’ It wasn’t the first time he had told her he loved her, but how he intensely gazed into her eyes made it feel different. Somehow more convincing that he wouldn’t let things go on like this.
‘I love you too, Rob. I just want to be happy and for us to get past this... Soon. It’s not how I imagined falling in love would be.’ His fingers trailed over her face softly.
‘It’s not how I want it to be. Give me time, just a little more. Let me try it my way for a little longer.’ She nodded and let him kiss her slowly and passionately in the dark car park. When he released her, he walked her to her car and deposited her inside. ‘I’ll follow you back to the cottage. We can phone for food when we get there. I love you.’
It was almost as if he could sense her rising insecurity tonight, or maybe all the late tension was bothering him too, but Rose felt a little lighter with how he looked at her.
‘Sure, you can keep up?’ She grinned and pulled her door shut. Starting her car with a wicked gleam in her eye and warning him that she didn’t intend to drive like a lady.