CASSIUS
I was excited for the day at the amusement park, and from the smile Makayla gave me as she climbed into the car that morning, she was excited, too. I was dropping Deira off at work on our way, so I had brought coffee for her and juice for Makayla.
As Deira got into the car, she looked around at it in amazement.
"How many cars do you have?"
"Oh, I, um... I'm just borrowing it from a friend. I thought it would work better than a sports car." Deira nodded in agreement and didn't say anything else. I didn't tell her that I'd actually specially rented the car for the day. I'd picked the car with the best safety ratings, something that seemed practical. I knew Deira felt that my lifestyle was too expensive and flashy, and I was trying to show her that I wasn't like that all the time.
I was hoping seeing me in a family-type car would make her realize that I could be family-friendly, too.
It was just a short drive to the amusement park once we dropped Deira off. It was a local place that didn't have a lot of big rides, but that made it perfect for a kid Makayla's age. Makayla was pretty quiet once we were alone. I had downloaded the music she picked in the car the other day, so I put that on. She gasped, and her eyes lit up.
"This is my favorite!" she said, grinning at me.
"I thought it might be," I replied, smiling at her. "Should I turn it up?"
"Yes!" she shouted. I turned up the music, and she immediately started singing along. After the song ended, she asked me to start it over again.
"You have to learn the words so you can sing with me, okay?" she said. I wasn't much of a singer, but looking down at her eager face, all I could do was nod, and try my best to at least hum along.
"What do you want to do first?" I asked once we were inside the park.
"I get to pick?!" Makayla asked. I nodded, and she squealed excitedly. We went over to look at the map near the entrance, and she picked the carousel. I helped her up onto a white horse with a gold mane, and she insisted I ride the purple horse beside it. After the ride was over, she asked if we could go again. This time we switched horses.
After the carousel, we went on the spinning teacups ride, also twice. Then we went on the bumper cars three times. She really loved crashing into me with her car. I made sure not to go too fast, so she could catch me, and whenever she did, she'd run into me full speed and then laugh really hard.
For lunch, I got us hotdogs with funnel cakes for dessert. After lunch, we tried a few calmer rides, like the train that circled the whole park. During the train ride, she chatted my ear off, pointing at different things and talking about them. She asked a lot of questions, and I did my best to answer them. She seemed really smart, and I couldn't help but feel proud as I listened to her. Next, we went on miniature gondolas that bobbed along a tiny, manmade river. She had gotten a little quieter, and kind of leaned against me, so I thought she must be tired. After the gondolas, we went to the arcade section of the park and played games for the rest of our time there. When she asked how many game tokens we could buy and I told her as many as she wanted, her eyes lit up.
"I wantone hundred," she said, and when I put money into the machine and entered 100, her eyes got big as saucers. I handed her the cup full of tokens and she whispered, "I didn't think I could actually get one hundred." It was adorable, but it also pulled at my heartstrings. Getting that many tokens wasn't particularly expensive, but she acted as though she'd won the lottery.
"Do you ever play games with your mom?" I asked her casually as we were playing a driving game. She nodded.
"Look out, there's a cow in the road!" she screamed, laughing at the silly game. After a second, she seemed to return to my question. "There's a place like this near our apartment," she said. "But we only go once in a while, because we're on a budget." I hated hearing that, and I almost felt a little mad at Deira. Of course, it wasn't her fault if they didn't have much money. But why did she keep refusing my offers for help?
I didn't say anything more to Makayla and just told her that if she showed me where the arcade was, I would buy her 100 tokens for that place, too.
"Okay!" she said, grinning. "Thank you, Cassius!" Watching her face light up reminded me of when she'd hugged me in the car. It was such a small thing, and yet it made me feel warm inside.
After the park closed, we had a little time left before I said I'd have her home, so I asked if she wanted dinner. She immediately picked a fast-food place and told me she wanted the meal with the toy. I agreed, and then she suddenly looked pensive.
"Is that too expensive? Momma told me not to ask for anything too expensive."
I tightened my hands on the wheel.
"No, it's not too expensive. It's very cheap."
"Okay," she said. "Then can I have a milkshake?"
We got her the meal with the milkshake, and she ate it faster than I would have expected from such a tiny person. She fell asleep on the way home, so, when we got there, I texted Deira that I'd carry her up and gently picked her up from the back seat of the car. Deira met us at the door to the apartment building and directed me toward their place. I was mostly concentrating on not waking Makayla up, but I couldn't help but notice how shabby the space was.