AZURA
My heart shatters as I watch Leo on his knees, cradling her body to his chest. Not one sound leaves him, but the pain and anguish that radiates off him is something I don’t even need the mate bond to feel. It fills the air, and I have never seen him so... vulnerable. The man that tries not to show emotions, who is always strong and cold, is now broken. Devastated by the loss of his loved ones. I wish I could turn back time and stop this from happening. I wish I could take his pain and make it my own.
Why her? I wish I had called her last night... she must have been hoping I got her message. Jackie...
I simply kneel behind him, placing my arm around his shoulders and hoping it gives him some reprieve from the pain and heartbreak he is experiencing. His thudding heart is beating far faster than it should.
Closing my eyes, I try to squash the guilt that is consuming me. I brought Judah to them... I cost him his sister... and a best friend. I make sure my walls are up, and never have I ever reinforced them as much as I do now. I don’t want to let him know how I am feeling. Not wanting to add to his pain. Biting my lip, I hold him tightly from behind, squeezing my eyes shut, trying to control the burning pain that is rushing through me. Breathe...
I am so lost in my thoughts that I don’t even notice the door open behind me until Emmet’s angry shouts reach me.
"Don’t touch her!"
My eyes fly open to see Eric and another guard holding him by the arms. His hands are bound, and although he can’t awaken his wolf, he is staring at Leo with such hatred that it makes up for the lack of his wolf’s rage. My own anger flashes through me, hating how he is staring at Leo.
"Watch your tone," I growl. He sneers at me as he looks me over as if he has just seen me.
"Ah... the one whose fault all of this is..."
A pang of pain rushes through me. My fault...
Leo’s eyes flash as he looks up, brushing strands of Jackie’s hair back.
"Be happy I'm allowing you to see her when you don’t even fucking deserve that," he says, his voice dead of emotion and ice-cold. His aura suddenly grows as his eyes flash. "And one more word against Azura..." He leaves his threat hanging.
"She was my mate, who died because of your lack of capability! You both are at fucking fault!" Emmet spits, "Let me see her!" He struggles against the men holding him, but he is weakened.
"Don’t do this, Emmet!" Eric growls, his voice strained.
Leo stands up, lifting Jackie’s body gently, and places her on the table before planting a kiss on her forehead. He turns to Emmet, his arm possessively moving me behind him as if he doesn’t even want Emmet to look at me.
"I am the one who is allowing you to fucking be here, so show some respect to her and stop acting like a fucking prick."
Emmet sneers, "That’s my mate. I may have hurt her in my anger, but I'm not the one responsible for killing her. That’s on you, Leo!" Leo’s anger fills the room like a beast ready to destroy, his blazing steel blue eyes glaring at Emmet as he advances on him.
"For her sake, I am not going to fucking rip you apart, but remember she was the only fucking thing keeping me from killing you. With her gone... I'm not seeing a fucking incentive." He stops in front of him, his entire body on the brink of shifting. I can see his claws and hear the deepening of his voice. "For someone who just lost their mate, I can’t figure out why you aren’t running to her side to hold her," Leo snarls venomously, clenching his fists as he glares at the man before him. "She was ready to reject you and move on with her life. She deserved far more... you have five minutes."
Emmet doesn’t reply, walking towards the table. For a moment, I see the sadness in his eyes, but I am unsure if it is him or the bond. He has just lost his other half, but Leo had displayed far more emotions. It is clear that Emmet is not feeling the loss as deeply as Leo is.
Leo’s arm goes around my shoulders, guiding me towards the door at the same time Eric and the guard move Emmet closer to Jackie. Eric is crying as his eyes fall on her corpse. I move away from Leo, placing my hand on his shoulder as he looks away, almost as if ashamed to show his tears. Our eyes meet, and I give him a sad smile.
"Come on," Leo says quietly, holding his hand out to me. I nod and make my way over to him when Emmet speaks, his voice bitter and icy,
"Karma will not forget this, Leo." Leo’s frown deepens as he looks over his shoulder at Emmet.
"Excuse me?"
"My mate died because of your carelessness. Karma will come to collect... I’ll await the day I see the blood of that Elite next to you running down -"
An animalistic growl leaves Leo’s lips as he turns, lunging at Emmet.
"I will kill you," he growls venomously, slamming Emmet to the ground and punching him across the face, making blood spray from his nose. His heart is beating, and Emmet simply laughs.
"So much for respecting Jackie."
"Leo, come on," I say, going over to them. I glare down at Emmet as I force Leo off him. "He isn’t worth your time."
"Get him out of here. He doesn’t deserve to spend time with her," Leo hisses before storming to the door, his anger swirling around him. Emmet shakes his head as Eric and the other guard restrain him, pulling him to his feet.
"Go... but this is all the Elites are good for... causing death... to protect them, once more a few more of us lose our lives. Congratulations, Westwood. You’re the reason she’s dead."
Guilt envelopes me as Leo pulls me from the room. My head feels like it is going to explode, and my entire body burns as if it is enveloped in fire. I am the reason she is dead... I cast Judah’s shadow over this pack... I am the reason she’s gone. Emmet isn’t even wrong. Leo knows it. Deep down, he knows it... she died because of me, because I made the mistake of getting entangled with someone as sick as him.
"Leo! Jackie’s gone!"
I look up when Nikki comes running over, tears streaming down her cheeks as she runs straight to Leo, flinging her arms around his neck. My eyes flash as I look at them, both devastated at the loss of someone special, but I still want to rip her out of his arms. Maybe I am selfish...
The moment Leo’s hands go to her waist, I turn away. I can’t focus anymore; everything is a mess, and the excruciating pain in my head is about to burst. Why did I even think I could make a place here? I can hear them speaking, but I can’t focus. I take a shuddering breath and break into a run.
"Azura!" Leo’s voice yells, but I feel like my entire body is fighting against me.
I am the reason behind this. All I do is take the lives of those around me.
I stumble into the fresh air, my heart pounding as I fall to my knees, heaving. The blinding light around me feels too much.
Go away! Let me stay in the darkness.
Wrapping my arms around myself, I drop to my knees, feeling sick. My frustration and anger swirls around me.
This is all his fault. I am going to kill him. Judah has fucking messed with me for far too long!
The burning feels too intense, and I am unable to stop the scream of anguish as the pain erupts, and I just want it all gone.
"Azura..."
I gasp when I feel Leo’s touch. I look up, my eyes widening as I see him fight against the energy radiating off me. I look around, but all I can see are the blinding silver and gold flames surrounding me. Flames? My heart pounds as my gaze dips down, and I realise that the blinding light is emanating from me. A flame-like aura...
Strong arms wrap around me, taking away the crippling edge from the pain and guilt that I am feeling. It is my fault.
None of this is your fault, Leo’s voice comes as he fights against the surging aura whipping around me as he holds me.
Isn’t it? I want to believe that, to feel like it isn’t my fault...
"It’s going to be okay, baby girl," Leo promises as the shock of the bond makes me shiver. "Breathe..." His voice sounds strained, his heart thumping as he holds me in his arms, as he kneels on the ground.
Placing my hand on his chest, my eyes flutter shut as I let it all go. I feel it, the pulsing power that is emitting off me... so similar to that of my siblings'. Why now?
My legs give way, and Leo catches me as darkness blankets the area around us.
"I know you’re hurting... but if that bitch touches you even once more... I will destroy her, Leo," I hiss, trying to find an outlet for my emotions. I glare up at him, only for my anger to dissipate when I look into his eyes.
"Understood... but if you stayed a moment longer, you’d have noticed that I only touched her to get her off me," he says quietly.
Gazing into his blue eyes, I want to argue, but I am just being selfish. He has been through so much... he's shown me what I mean to him. I’m not a fool. I want an outlet for the turmoil inside, but he has just been through so much... and so I simply hug him back. Tightly. He makes me feel better.
"That aura... it looks... I'm assuming that’s the first time it happened." Frowning, I look at my hand.
"Yeah it is, and I don’t know why now..." I murmur.
"Seems like Kiara and Liam’s..." Leo muses quietly, running his fingers through my hair.
I know Kiara’s had awoken when she had felt extreme emotion which triggered it... my heart thuds as I realise something similar has just happened to me. My emotions had been out of control. It had just been building up. Looking around, I realise we aren’t alone. Several people rushed out, probably to see what the light was. Great.
"I don’t get it... where was this ability when I needed it?" I mutter, relieved as the small group disperses. He places a soft kiss on my forehead.
"I don’t really know. Sometimes Selene works in mysterious ways. Let’s get you home," he whispers, and I look up at him as he stands up, carrying me. I am too exhausted to argue and rest my head on his shoulder, allowing him to carry me.
I feel the baby kick, and my heart leaps as I place my hand on my stomach. It is almost as if my baby is telling me to stay strong.
We enter the apartment, and Leo carries me to his room, placing me on the bed. For a moment, I think he is going to leave me, but instead, he drops onto the bed next to me and I pull him close. I adjust my position, only for him to slip his arm under my head and hold me tight against his chest. We remain like that for a while before he speaks,
"Don’t blame yourself for anything he has done. I'm going to find him, one fucking way or another, and he will pay. For everything," he says quietly. Sighing, I nod slowly.
"I wish there is more I can do. I feel useless as your mate," I muse quietly. I never thought I’d be the future Luna...
He grips the side of my neck, forcing me to look up at him.
"Are you for real? Being by Kareena’s side today is what a Luna would do. You don’t need to do anything different... just follow your heart, beautiful, and you’ll be okay." I nod slowly, a thought that had occurred to me earlier returning.
"The funeral organising... shall I get onto it tomorrow?" I whisper. His heart thuds, and I reach up, running my fingers through his hair.
"Yeah, if you’re okay to do it. Kesha will help you," he says quietly, referring to the Beta female.
"I will." I nod as our eyes meet. His are still a little bloodshot, full of emotions.
"I will never lose you," he whispers, almost as if promising himself. His gaze dips to my lips before he claims them in a deep, intense kiss.
No, you won’t, because I'm not going anywhere, I murmur through the link, kissing him back with equal passion. We move back after a while, and I look towards the window.
"Shower and change. I’ll make you a coffee and check up on Corrado. He must be worried."
He nods, and for a moment, those words are on the tip of my lips. Instead, I simply smile at him, and he pulls me close, kissing me once more. I leave the room, switching the coffee machine on before walking down the hall to Corrado’s room. I peek in, spotting Winona sitting by the bed, but it is obvious Corrado is awake.
"Mommy!" He exclaims the moment he spots me, pushing his duvet off. Winona stands up apologetically.
"He has not slept." I shake my head slightly.
"That’s okay, you can go. Get some rest, too." She nods as I smile gently, walking over to Corrado. "Hey... not tired?" I ask softly. Flinging his arms around my waist, he shakes his head.
"What’s happening, Mommy?" He asks, and my heart squeezes seeing the uncertainty and fear in his eyes. Even children pick up on everything. Shaking my head, I give him a small smile.
"It’s just... don’t worry. How about you sleep with Mommy and Daddy tonight?" I ask softly, brushing his hair off his forehead. He looks up at me with hopeful eyes.
"Can I?"
"Of course you can. Let’s go have some milk," I reply, smiling warmly at him before I take his hand, leading him out of his room.
In just a few short weeks I am already a mama with my own family, and for them I will always stay strong. I’ll make sure to be the binding to keep everything together.