This is hard.
This is fucking hard.
Trying to get Naomi out of my head is hard. I've tried and it's been over a week since we last saw each other. And the further I tried to give her space, telling myself that she needed time with me, the more I craved her, the more I couldn't stop thinking about her. No day goes by that I don't think about her. She's becoming a distraction and I don't like that.
I can't get the image of her in my bed that Sunday morning out of my head. Wearing nothing but my dress shirt as she sleeps like a baby. She looks innocent when she's sleeping, unlike the feisty, strong-headed woman who doesn't listen to anyone.
I can't stop.
I can't stop thinking about her in my shirt trying to reach for a box of sugar, with me behind her as her butt nearly touched my crotch.
God, how can she be so fucking beautiful?
All my life I've only thought about two things: My company, and my family. Nothing else. But ever since I met Naomi, she's planted herself in my head and no matter how hard I try to forget her and get her out of my head, she's not leaving.
Trust me, I've tried.
I tell myself I need to stop chasing her because my intentions towards this woman are completely filthy. I am her boss, even if she doesn't work for me directly, she's still a cocktail waitress in my club. That should give me the insight that we're two different people from two different worlds. She's a young beautiful woman with her life ahead of her, I shouldn't try to ruin her with my filthy intentions.
As much as I know, craving her and lusting for her is wrong and unlike me, I still can't help myself. Once I want something, I always have it, even if I have to go the extra mile to get it. I want Naomi, all of her. I want her underneath me, on top of me, with my length buried deep inside her. I want her to wake up naked in my bed every other morning, with tousled hair because I fucked her real good last night. I want to mark her everywhere with my bites so when she's out there, people will know she's taken. Period, I want Naomi to be mine. I want all of her. I want to know her, I want to have her, I want to claim her, and God help me, I want to be with this woman.
I've never craved anything as much as I'm craving for Naomi. It's strange. All I care about is business, making more money, and grabbing any business opportunities out there. But since I set my eyes on her that fateful Friday night, she's all I think about. And there are times when I'm supposed to be in a business meeting and she's the only thing on my mind. I don't like that. I don't want to think about her, but it's not working. I've tried, and she's still not leaving my mind.
How can I want one woman this much? A woman I haven't fucked or have a taste of? There is no day that I am not tempted to just drive to my club just so I can see her, but I don't. I haven't even visited my club since the very first day I met her.
I can't help it. She's like a narcotic drug and I can't get enough of her. And as I pound into Celine from behind, with her breasts pressed against my office desk, Naomi is the only thing I think about, wishing she's the one beneath me instead of Celine
Celine moans and her loud moans are beginning to irritate me. I want to pull out of her, ask her to get dressed, and leave, but that will be awkward. Because I've been fucking Celine for quite a long time now. She's an easy lay. Anytime I wanted to get off and empty my sac, I just drove to Celine or asked her to come over.
Celine and I are like acquaintances, not really friends or anything. We met during a charity event and she wasn't bad, at least she knew how to satisfy my cock. She's a businesswoman, owns her own clothing line and her family is rich. We hit it off from there. She would drop by when she was horny and we would fuck and I would call her over just to get off too. Unlike most women, Celine isn't clingy. She understands we're just having sex and she respects my decision. Even though we've only had sex not more than four times, well today making it five times, Celine doesn't cross her boundary. And I like her for that.
We stopped hooking up and having sex nearly four months ago. The minute I called her over today, she was surprised, asking me if her number was the right number I intended to call. My mother had even accidentally walked in on us going over at it in my kitchen. When Celine left that evening, my mother teased me about her. Telling me to give Celine a chance, saying Celine is a good girl.
Little did they know that relationships are the last thing on my mind right now.
With a silent groan, I climaxed. It wasn't as intense as I thought, probably because throughout the sex and when Celine had my cock in her mouth, I thought about the cocktail waitress in my club. I pull out of Celine and walk to the bathroom at the corner of my office. I get rid of the condom and wash my hands. I stare at my reflection as I run my hands over my hair to tame it.
I go back to my office and Celine is already decent, running a hairbrush over her hair.
She smiles when she sees me. "I gotta ask." She starts. "Is something wrong?"
"What do you mean?" I ask her, wrapping my tie around my neck and working the knot.
"I don't know. You don't look yourself today. And I felt like you didn't want me, you know."
Celine drops her hairbrush inside her bag and pulls out a small mirror and red lipstick.
I give her a small smile. "Sorry. I've been thinking too much about work."
"I don't think this is about work. It's a girl, isn't it?" She asks, smirking as she rolls back her lipstick and smacks her lips together.
I am not surprised Celine picked up on my unusual attitude. She's a very observant woman and that doesn't normally come in handy with a pretty face and a smart brain. Celine has all of it. She's pretty, pale–skinned, and tall. She's a redhead, with full tits, small hips, and a small butt. She's pretty successful for her age too. She's the complete opposite of Naomi who has small breasts, wide hips, an average butt, not that tall, olive-skinned, brunette, and Naomi's far prettier. She's nothing like Celine. She's nothing like me, and yet, she makes me crave her desperately without even trying.
"Mr. Black?"
"I'm fine. Really. I'm just stressed with work. You know how it is." I'm not willing to talk to Celine about a woman I'm supposed to be avoiding, but failing miserably.
"Okay." She smiles and grabs her bag. "You have my number, you can always call me whenever you want to get off some steam," Celine says as she turns around to leave, swaying her small hips as she steps out of my office.
I grab an air freshener and spritz the air with it. Once the room smells normal, I keep the air freshener back.
"Fuck." I take a deep breath, with my hands in my pockets as I stare at the city of New York through the one–way glass walls of my office.
There's a soft knock on my door. I stay quiet, not really In the mood to talk about business right now. I probably should just go home and get drunk, but acting that way won't push my business forward. I need to get off my ass, and that can only happen if I put Naomi at the back of my head. There's a knock again and I usher the person in.
I don't bother to turn around as the door to my office opens and closes.
"Mr. Black," Raymond calls.
I slowly turn around to look at him. I raise my eyebrows, urging him to speak. My look is stoic, and Raymond knows that when I'm like this, I'm not in the mood for plenty of talks.
"Okay. The marketing department is presenting a market campaign for the new updated virtual assistant and they're wondering if you're gonna drop by and check it out yourself before the launch date." He says.
Fuck.
I rub my hand on my chin and walk towards my chair.
"And?"
"Harrison Bartholomew called today about the club. He's still wondering if you're thinking about investing in his club, and you have a meeting by 3 pm today with Brock's enterprises CEO, Leo Brock."
"What exactly does he want? Leo."
"He wants to talk about a partnership concerning our new virtual assistant."
"Okay. Good. Anything else?" I'm not in my best mood today and the people who work for me and my floor know that.
"You don't have an assistant, Killian. This is her job and not mine."
I lean back in my seat as I stare at him. What does he mean by ‘I don't have an assistant anymore’?
"You fired her, remember? Yesterday?" Raymond tries to make me recall.
"Oh. Kirsten? Right."
She was a little flirt. She was slow, and there were times she dressed unprofessionally to work thinking that would catch my attention. Yesterday she had a little too much lipstick and the top buttons of her blouse were left undone. I gave her a load of work to do and asked her to stroll out of my company and never come back.
How could I forget that? I remembered coming to work this morning and my assistant wasn't out of my office waiting for me with my coffee.
"I fired her yesterday."
"I am aware." He says and sits down on the chair opposite mine. "You didn't tell me the reason."
"She was a flirt. She was trying to have sex with her boss, which is me. I hate tardiness and unprofessionalism."
"Really? You've fired four of your assistants in less than three months. No one's willing to take the job anymore, especially our workers."
I glare at Raymond.
"Is this about Naomi?" He asks.
"What?"
What has Naomi come to do with this? She doesn't even work for me?
"You've been acting strange since the day I saw her in your house dressed in your shirt. I don't know what happened and maybe it's your business and it's fine if you don't want to tell me, but we're friends, Killian. You can't be this distracted by a girl who serves alcohol in your club. You've got a company to run, Killian."
"I'm aware I have a company to run and that's exactly what I'm doing." I sound colder than I intended.
"I know that, but…"
"Raymond, do you have anything else to say?" I ask my friend. I don't want to sound or come off as rude, but I just can't help it.
I agree I've been a little distracted lately, but Naomi's not the cause. Other things are bothering me.
Raymond sighs and nods defeatedly.
"You're supposed to have dinner with your brother today. He called my phone, telling me you're not picking up your phone. I just thought it'd be nice to remind you."
I nod.
"Thank you, Raymond."
He doesn't answer as he stands up.
"I advise you to get a new assistant."
"You can tell HR to set up a vacancy and I need an older woman. A woman with a husband and kids. The husband and kids don't really matter but I want someone aged. My mother's age if possible."
Raymond smiles slightly and nods.
"And also if you desperately want this woman, I think you should work harder to win her heart. Not every woman wants your money, Killian. You shouldn't forget that. Try to impress her with something other than cash. Try to show her you really want her, not just want to have sex with her." Raymond says and leaves.
Now, how the fuck am I supposed to impress Naomi when she is always uncomfortable around me? She can't even stand me. What does she even want? How can I make her mine? The right place and person to get an answer from is my older brother, Keith. I should probably return his call back.
***
I look through the menu for anything light to order. We're in a small, but expensive restaurant outside of the city. Keith loves to come here. Surprisingly, he met Eve here for the first time. I think their love story is a love-at-first-sight kind of thing. She was a chef here and that fateful day, Keith and I decided to come out here to eat. His steak was raw and poorly cooked. He hated it and decided he needed to see the chef and that was when Eve showed up. At first sight, she got my brother tongue-tied. Eve is beautiful, tall, with curly brown hair, her skin is like chocolate, and she's intelligent and nice. Well, not my type, but she's pretty hot.
It didn't take much effort and convincing from my brother and the next minute, these two are already engaged.
"Still finding it difficult to order?" Keith asks, looking at me from the top of his menu.
"I'm not hungry," I say.
I drop my menu and usher the attention of the waitress.
"What are you getting?"
"Chicken Alfredo. It's pretty great."
"Hmm." I nod, glancing at the busy life of New York through the thick transparent walls.
It's Friday evening and the street is piled with different kinds of people, coming and going.
"What can I get you both?" A female voice asks.
I turn away from the life outside of this transparent glass as I stare at the waitress. She's smirking.
"I'll get the Chicken Alfredo."
"Wine, please. The whole bottle." I say to her.
She stares at me, a little unsure as she nods and leaves.
"The whole bottle, huh?"
"You know I don't like my wine poured into a glass. I prefer the whole bottle. Plus, aren't you going to drink?"
Keith nods. "Yeah."
"Good."
"How's business?" He changes the subject.
I shrug. "Good."
Keith nods again. "That's good to hear."
"How's Eve and the baby?"
Keith smiles at my question. Eve is the best thing that's ever happened to his life and I’m happy for him.
"They're both fine. Eve's bump is slowly becoming more evident. I can't wait till we get married."
"I'm happy for you, man."
"Thanks. What about you? You've been in one of your moods since we got here and I'm thinking a woman's behind it."
Is it obvious that I've been thinking about Naomi since the day she left my house? I don't know why I couldn't stop thinking about her and how she left my house in a bad mood a week ago. Is it because I bought her a dress without telling her or because I brought her to my house when she was wasted? All in all, she didn't leave in a good mood. She acted strangely and like I hurt her or something.
I don't understand her and it's fucking with my head.
"Before you lie, you just thought about her right now," Keith says.
I scoff.
"I've been stressed, Keith."
"You're a workaholic, Kil, but in the long time I've known you, baby brother, you've never complained about your business or your company. You might always be stressed, but you never talk about it. Tell me, who's the lucky woman?"
Lucky woman?
I nearly rolled my eyes at that. I think I'm the lucky one. I don't even deserve her. Because hidden beneath her feisty and strong-headed attitude, lies a pure, innocent woman. An independent, beautiful woman. A woman who hasn't been treated the way she deserved.
"Killian…" Keith calls for my attention.
I open my mouth to deny his claims but my mouth clamps shut at the sight in front of my eyes. The source of my thoughts. Naomi walks into the restaurant with a guy standing impossibly close to her. I stare at him with a glare, eyeing the man she's with. He leads her towards a table and that's when I recognize him. He's the man from Bart's. The man who kissed her.
That fucking fuck. Why are they together?
I can recall perfectly well that she told me he was her ex. Why is she with her ex? Are they back together? What does she even see in this fuckin' prick?
Didn't he try to assault her knowing she was drunk and vulnerable at Bart's? What is it with women and their exes? Can't they just move on without coming or getting back with their exes? I don't know when I ball my fists beside me. I want to punch the asshole and tell him she's mine.
He says something to her and she smiles. She fucking smiled!
I watch him pull out a seat for her and she says something to him, 'thank you', obviously, as she sits down. She glances briefly around the restaurant and our eyes locked.
Fuck me.