I almost couldn't believe it. I'm…… I'm pregnant? But how? Flashes of that night come into my mind. No….. No….. It……. It can't be. I try to convince myself that I couldn't be pregnant from Zephyr raping me but alas, I was failing miserably at it. How can I be pregnant with that monster's child? My life is officially ruined, he had managed to succeed in his plans. He was right when he said that I would never be able to truly escape him.
I had run away from the pack, met up with amazing people who had taken me in and treated me no less than a queen but yet I wasn't completely free from him, he still managed to haunt my dreams, to toy with my sanity and now his seed is growing inside me. Just how cruel could fate be? What had I done to deserve this?
I didn't even realize when I burst into tears. Elsie saw this and the look on her face turned from one of anger to that of worry and sadness.
"Evelyn, Evelyn are you OK? Why are you crying so much? I didn't mean to upset you, you know you can tell me anything." She tried to pacify me but I just kept crying and she understood that I needed to cry out my pain, the pain that I had bottled up and hidden for so long. The one that was slowly eating away at my soul.
After crying for close to an hour with Elsie relentlessly hugging me and patting me softly on my back, I was finally ready to discuss my dreadful past.
I cleaned the tears from my eyes and sniffed, Elsie got up to get me my book and pen. I held the pen in my hand and attempted to write something down but found that I couldn't, my hands were shaking and Elsie saw this as well.
She hugged me and for the first time said, "Who hurt you? Who has scarred you so deeply? Who has made such a strong girl so vulnerable? Please tell me and I'll do my best to punish the culprit, he has to pay for his terrible crimes against you. Please tell me and free your heart and mind of every fear, of every doubt." She soothed and I finally found the courage to.
I picked up the book and pen once more and wrote down the name of that demon. She took a look at it and gave me a questioning look.
"Zephyr? Who's Zephyr?" She questioned. I wrote that Zephyr was my mate. "He was your mate? Did he reject you? But if he did, how are you pregnant?" I sighed at her words because they were only opening up old wounds.
"Enough of this Evelyn, just tell her already. Tell her the truth about Zephyr, tell her everything he did to us from the very beginning and please don't leave anything out. She deserves to know the truth because she saved us and you deserve to be free, to find some respite. Please tell her." Tara urged me and I had no choice other than revealing everything to her.
I took the notebook from her and started on a fresh page, writing down everything I could in summary but as detailed as possible. After about a few minutes of writing, I passed the notebook over to her and she read it but as she did, her eyes widened in shock and her hand flew to her mouth next.
"Oh my goodness, holy moons! Did he really do all this to you?" She questioned, the shock apparent in her eyes and voice. I only nodded weakly, my body feeling tired and ready to give out again.
"I can't believe that such a cruel person actually exists, he doesn't deserve to be alive. I have to inform Richard about this, we'll go to war with the pack if we have to but I won't sit by and let such a huge injustice done to my sister slide by. Something definitely has to be done about this and fast." Elsie said and made to stand up but I grabbed her hand and stopped her.
I shook my head in the negative and pleaded with her with my eyes not to do anything, she seemed shocked to see me do this.
"Don't you want me to get justice for you?" Elsie questioned and when I shook my head, she sat back down. "Why? Are you really that afraid of him? You don't have to be so scared, don't worry. I'll protect you with everything it takes and I promise that he won't hurt you anymore." She promised as tears flowed down her cheeks.
I felt amazed to see tears in her eyes. At that moment, I realized I had been blessed despite my troubles. I had gotten such a lovely sister that cared for me, someone that could actually feel my pain.
I didn't stop her from starting a war because I'm still afraid of Zephyr, it's actually far from that. I just didn't want innocent people to get hurt because of me, that wouldn't be justice, it would be brutal revenge.
Though I've thankfully never experienced war, I have seen when our pack had a small clash with a rival. Though I didn't witness it, and I'm glad that I didn't, I've seen how badly injured the warriors were when they returned. They were bleeding badly and it wasn't a pretty sight.
I know how terrible war can be because everything is fair during a war. The killing of innocent women and even children is seen as fair because it's a battle of strength. Though a lot of people in that pack haven't been very nice to me, I can say that there are people that haven't done anything to me.
A few people in the past had helped me and a few others just avoided me, not wanting to offend me or sympathize with me. Either way, I couldn't list those people as my enemies and the most important thing to me were the children. They were helpless and innocent, not having a single care in the world. I had babysitted most of the pups and I had really grown to love them despite the harsh behaviour of their parents towards me.
I couldn't bear to have so many innocent people killed because of me, especially as I'm with child. I wouldn't be able to live with myself.
I wrote everything down, explaining it to her. She read it and smiled at me.
"I feel very proud to have a sister like you. You are so very considerate and that's admirable but what about Zephyr? Are you just going to let him go scot free even after all he did to you?" She questioned and I really didn't have an answer to that.
I thought about it and wrote down the first thing that came to mind. I wrote that I would rather let goddess Selene punish him because she knew the best punishment to give him.
Elsie sighed and nodded, apparently not satisfied with my decision but I knew she would always support me and I'm really grateful for that.
"OK Evelyn, as you wish." She said and I grabbed her in a hug.
"So what are you going to do about your pregnancy? Will you keep it?" She questioned and my thoughts came to a standstill.
Should I keep this pregnancy, despite knowing who the father of the baby is? I knew that I would never be able to love the child because he or she would always remind me of the terrible things Zephyr did to me and I would just grow to hate the child and I didn't want the child to have to go through such pain. The sting of hatred from loved ones was definitely unbearable and I didn't want such for the innocent child and so I made a decision instantly, I will not keep this child.