Jessamine
He’s drunk.
I should have known serving him glass after glass would lead here. My hands trapped in his, held above my head, and his body a cage above mine. His long lashes flutter as he breathes in deeply. “Say it again.”
The lie comes as easy as breathing. “I’m yours.”
His canines gleam as he gives me a smile no one else has seen. “Youknowwhat intriguesme themostaboutyou?” His words tumble out together and it takes only a second to pull them apart as he leans in, his hot breath tickling my nose. “That I can’t tell your lies apart from your truths.”
“Now, that is a terrible lie,” I whisper, reaching up to brush my lips against his chin. He shudders, a strangled noise building in his throat. “You like that you never know what I’m thinking. You love the danger I present. It excites you. It is why you keep me close, despite knowing I have a dagger strapped to my thigh, especially made to kill you. You romanticize with death, and death I will be, for you.”
His response is a heated slash of a smile. “And when might that be? I don’t suppose the arrival of your mate might speed up the process?” he teases, desire flaring in his gaze. But I see his eyelids growing heavier by the second, his breaths deepening.
Nipping on his jaw, I force out a throaty moan, “I told you, I don’t love him anymore. I’m tired of waiting on men who never choose me first.”
Atticus chuckles deeply. “I used to think patience was my greatest virtue, dove.” One hand leaves my wrist and find the helm of my dress, hiking it upward with trembling fingers. He groans when his fingers touch my legs, and he closes his eyes. “Until I met you.”
When he leans in to kiss me, I close my eyes, not because I am eager, but it is the only way I can hide my revulsion. But the full weight of his body begins to fall on me and I roll out from under him before he can crush me. He hits the bed, snoring softly, and if I didn’t know he had a special place in the dungeons where he hid the women he still raped and killed from me, I would think he looked innocent.
Glaring at his sleeping form, I raise my hand and hit him. Twice, in quick succession. He doesn’t shake, and my gaze flicks to the table, where his sword rests. I could kill him right now. I really should. But I know there is no way I’ll make it past that door with Killian outside. Sighing, I pinch the bridge of my nose. I’ll have my time, soon enough.
I ease a deep breath into my lungs before setting to work. Atticus always has his keys on his nightstand. Keys to every fucking room in this castle, and some. I have no idea which one opens the dungeons or the infirmary, but I suppose I’m about to find out.
Loosening my hair from my braids, I suck in my bottom lip hard, so it looks like it is swollen from kissing. I pinch my cheeks, making them appear flush and a quick flick of my already aching nipples make them appear hard and the smell of Atticus’s arousal covers me. All of this to get through the guards outside without suspicion. It might have been easier any other day, but it’s fucking Killian. He doesn’t hide his suspicion of me and he is the one man Atticus trusts above anyone else. Even me.
Before heading to the door, I drop the keys into my corset and I wince as the cold metal bites the top of my belly. Hiding it with a hand atop my belly, I make my exit and walk right into Killian.
“Your Grace,” he says, not bothering with a bow. His black eyes are already roving my body, his nostrils flaring as he sniffs for blood, and when he peeks in behind me, all he sees is Atticus tucked in, shirtless. “I have it on good word that His Majesty sleeps more peacefully when you’re around.”
I smile prettily, tucking my hair behind my ear shyly and I let the door close quietly. “Must be all of the…” I don’t need to complete the sentence. The other guards shift uncomfortably but Killian isn’t buying it.
He offers me a hand and a tentative smile. “I’ll walk you.”
“I’d like to take a walk in the gardens. The thought of staying in makes me nauseous. I need some air,” I reply, leaving his hand hanging. By the time we take the steps to my room, the guard shift would have begun and it’ll become harder to evade those stationed outside my room. I don’t have the time for that. Knowing Killian, he would probably still offer to come with me. Refusal would rouse his suspicion. So, I tell him something he won’t be able to resist. “Raya,” I start and his body goes rigid.
If I didn’t know better, I’d think that was worry in his gaze.
“She’s been itching to get out. There’s an invite for a bonfire she received from Duke Madoc’s son. What was his name again…”
“Heath.” Killian’s growl is something of fury, disapproval, and I stand corrected but that is a hint of jealousy.
I nod, a look of concern resting on my face. “Yes, yes. Heath.” Raya hates him, but Killian doesn’t have to know that. She was going to sneak out to attend the bonfire, just to get some fun. She’s young and passionate about life. Holding her here as prisoner has to be grueling and Goddess knows I feel terrible for this. “I worry that he might take advantage of her. You have seen the way he looks at her. Our kind doesn’t mix well with the humans and if he’s taken an interest in her anyway…it can’t be good.”
I’m so sorry, Raya. She must be gone by now. Hurling her back here would take Killian some time. Time that I need tonight.
Killian starts down the hallway in angry strides, but he suddenly turns around and closes the distance between us. His voice is barely above a whisper near my ear. “I know you’re throwing me off your trail because you are up to something. When I return, I will find out precisely what that is. You may fool everyone else, but your act, your submission, your seduction, none of it fools me. I see right through you. I can smell your anger and disgust. I am watching you, princess.”
Moments after he leaves, I stay in place, calming my racing heart, and when I have it under control, I head straight for the gardens, waiting out the guard shift, pacing and biting my nails nervously.
Once I notice the sounds of retreating footsteps, I hurry toward the small cottage behind the castle. Breaking in is easy, seeing as the physician prefers to sleep in his reserved room in the castle, over this hellhole that reeks heavily of bane.
I find all the bottles of bane they have me drink every morning and I empty each with speed, replacing its contents with a mixture of healthy tonics and antidotes. It helps that it has no smell, and the new physician, Hale, would never drink it to check if it was the same. It’d take weeks before he’d have to make a new batch and by then, Ashbourne will be in absolute chaos.
Pleased with my work, I head over to the dungeons, keeping to the shadows. There are little to no guards on ground. Their short break has a few minutes before it reaches its end. I pick up my pace, going several steps down the dark, spiraling staircases before I reach the suffocating hallway.
“Who’s there?!” a voice barks, and my steps falter. Of course, it’d be stupid to leave this place completely unguarded. Why didn’t I think of that? Goddess.
A single torch burns brightly down the path and when I make my presence known, the male—six foot tall, large in every sense of the word, a werewolf with a gleam in his eyes that reminds me of Slyder—sneers. “Killian said you would come.” A snicker. “You should have known better.”
“You will let me in to see Kier.”
He cocks his head, suddenly amused. “He will have no visitors, Your Grace.” His tone is condescending. Mocking.
“I am your Queen—”
“You,” he growls, his eyes taking in my appearance and I realize that I still look like I just had sex with Atticus. “Are a fucking tart who doesn’t know her place. ‘Queen’ around here is just a title. One none of us recognize. While you were parting your thighs for the boy-king, we fought to claim this kingdom. The only recognition you’ll get around here is for being a sleazy whore who couldn’t even stay faithful to her mate.”
Maybe it is my hormones raging, or the bite of Kier’s doubt that makes me respond, but I really should have known better than slapping him. I’ve had my fair share of insults from guards in the past few months and I have never responded in this manner.
For a second, he stares at me, confused, and then, something dangerous snaps behind those cold eyes. He backhands me. The world spins as I stumble, my shoulder hitting the wall, and the inside of my cheek splits, filling my mouth with the taste of blood.
I blink back the tears obscuring my vision in time to see him closing in on me. “You could buy my silence, you know.” My hand drifts to the dagger strapped to my thigh. “I’ll let you see him and even keep it quiet if you—”
He doesn’t expect it. I didn’t plan to either. I just…didn’t want to hear him say those things to me. I didn’t want him crowding my space and shoving me against the wall. I didn’t want his hands on my skin. Humoring Atticus was already hard enough. I just couldn’t handle another assault. So, with deadly precision, I stab into his chest. He roars as I drive the dagger up, through his ribcage, and force it past his bone and into his heart.
His roar ceases and he goes limp, tumbling to the floor. I retrieve my dagger and walk over him. I was going to have to get rid of him anyway. Great. Now I have one more thing to worry about. Getting rid of his body. Later. I’ll deal with it later.
The dungeons have to be the most disgusting place I’ve ever set foot in. I step in and I gag. Another and I feel the walls and smells closing in. I stop for a few seconds to pull a few breaths in before continuing. I peek into cell after cell, searching, but most are empty, and those that aren’t hold half crazed men who coo at me or lunge to grab my skirts.
Kier’s cell is at the very end and I am surprised to find Darrock’s opposite his. “Well well, look who we have here.”
I ignore him and pull out the keys from my corset. Unlocking the door sends a heavy click echoing in the air, loud enough to wake every other prisoner, but Kier doesn’t turn from his position by the wall. A deep ache unfurls behind my ribs as I pull the bar and it gives. But I don’t move. I freeze because…because it’s been so long and I’ve missed him and I want to hold him, feel his arms around me, take away this emptiness I have lived with for so long, but he doesn’t move.
A quick inspection of him shows his eyelash fluttering as he stares blankly at the wall.
“Kier,” I whisper, forcing my body to move. I fall to the ground beside him and raise my hand to touch him.
But his hand darts up swiftly, smacking mine away. He turns to look at me and his eyes are cold and empty. “Don’t fucking touch me with those hands. They reek. You reek.”
Aghast, I remember once again that I am indeed still covered in Atticus’s scent. “We didn’t—”
“Spare me the details, Jessamine. I don’t want to hear it.”
Swallowing the painful, growing lump in my throat I try again. “N-nothing happened.” He doesn’t look at me. I crawl around and take his face in my hands, forcing his gaze to mine. Hazel bear into me with chilling intensity. “Kier, please. You can’t honestly think—”
In trying to get close to him, my belly pokes in his arm, and something in him snaps. “Get off me!”
The force of his command barrels into me and the weight sends me back hard enough to hit my back against the wall. Pain ripples through me, but it’s not enough to cripple me. Tears well in my eyes as Kier watches me, panting. “Get out. Before I hurt you.”
“I-I can’t. I got the keys. The guards won’t be back for another fifteen minutes. I came to get you out. The tunnels beneath the castle lead to—”
He laughs harshly. “I came here for you. Every day, I wondered what form of torture you were subjected to. There were nights I could have sworn I felt your pain. Nights I woke up with your name on my lips. I walked in through those gates, let those fools beat me up, spit on me, because I just had to know you were fine. Unbroken. I just…I was going mad, worried about you! But I shouldn’t have been! You’re pregnant with his child!” A frustrated cry slips from him and he slams his fist into the wall beside my head, cracking it.
“It isn’t his!” I yell, tears trickling down my cheeks.
He stares at me for a moment, and then growls, “Then whose is it? Was there someone else? Do the humans entice you as well?”
His words slap me in the face and I do not waste a single second returning it. My palm connects with his cheek in the same moment I cry, “Fucking idiot! It’s yours!”
Kier’s jaw clenches. If the hit hurt him, he doesn’t show it. “Liar. You say this now to control the situation. If it was mine, I’d smell my pup on you.” He jerks his head toward the door. “Get the fuck out. I can’t…” He runs his fingers through his hair as he backs away. “I can’t look at you. You’ve ruined everything. Me. You might as well have ripped my heart out.”
I can’t do anything to stop the tears that spill down my cheeks in full waves or the pain spreading through my chest. “Do you even know me at all? I held out for months while you were off doing Goddess knows what. I waited for you, but you never came for me! I had no way of knowing if you would. I had to do what I could to survive—”
He looks disgusted. “And that is why you have chosen to punish me this way? Destroy me?!”
Oh Goddess. Every word that tumbles out of my mouth seems to be making it worse. I don’t know the right thing to say. I don’t know how clear this misunderstanding up before it destroys us both. “That is not what I meant.” I try reaching out again but he flinches, baring sharp canines at me, and the hostility rolling off him breaks my heart. “Kier, please. Don’t do this.” Ignoring his rebuttal, I force myself on my knees again, grasping his knees. “Hear me out. Please.”
When he yells at me again, it is packed with so much hate, it chases me from his cell. “Get out!”
I shut the door, but I don’t lock it. Reigning in my sob, I start to walk away when I spare a glance at Darrock, who’s already watching me carefully. Going against the anger I feel towards him, I unlock his cell. “Use the tunnels. I’ll take care of Raya.”
He says nothing to me. Or maybe he does. I can’t hear him past my own sobbing. I leave the dungeon feeling broken and dejected, but I stop by the body outside, dipping Atticus’s keys into the pool of it, and head straight to Killian’s room. I smear the blood on the dark wood and twist the doorknob, inviting myself in. No one will notice since it’s dark, but come morning, it’ll be a glaring red. And come morning, when Darrock is gone, there will be a traitor in our midst who let him out.
And it won’t be me.