Alyssa
A dull pressure blooms low in my abdomen, dragging me from my already restless sleep. With a groan, I shift, wincing as I pull myself upright. For what feels like the fiftieth time tonight, I have to fucking pee.
The familiar creak of the bed draws my attention-It's not from me but from movement at the foot. Blinking through the darkness, I make out King gripping Niko's hips, his face tightened with determination as he pounds into Niko. Niko's muffled moans fill the quiet room, his mouth stuffed with an article of clothing.
"Look what you fucking did, slut," King growls, delivering a sharp smack to Niko's ass that echoes in the quiet room. "You woke our kitten up."
"I'm sorry, baby," Niko whimpers around the gag, his voice tinged with guilt and arousal.
The sight is undoubtedly hot, a few weeks ago I might've come just from watching, but now it feels like I'm watching through a screen. Detached.
"You didn't wake me up," I mutter, sliding out of bed with a heavy sigh. "My bladder just hates me."
After flushing the toilet, I look in the mirror, noticing the fullness of my breasts, the persistent bloating in my belly, the dark smudges under my eyes from sleepless nights and relentless nausea.
The symptoms are all too familiar, no matter how much I try to ignore them.
I'm pregnant.
My chest tightens. How could I let this happen? I guess the first night King fucked me, I just threw caution to the goddamn wind, forgetting that months of unprotected sex could lead to this.
"You're such an idiot," I whisper to my reflection.
Wanting to give King and Niko some privacy, I slip downstairs to brew some coffee in the kitchen. Maybe I should be upset about two of my men being so consumed with each other lately, but it's my fault. I've been distant-emotionally and physically, for weeks. Aside from the daily, mandatory training that King makes me do now, I spend my day taking care of Zuri and sleeping.
An irrational fear creeps in. What if King and Niko realize they don't need me? What if I'm just...extra?
And now there's this...baby growing inside me, and one of them is the father. It seems like King's goal from the very beginning was to breed me. Now that he's gotten what he wanted, what if he doesn't want me anymore?
I shake my head, tears stinging my eyes. No. That doesn't sound like something he'd do. None of them would just abandon me, but still, I can't shake the feeling of dread weighing me down.
Even away from the clubhouse, I feel trapped. Because as long as Isaac is still alive, I'll never be free. And how can I be happy about this pregnancy when I've created another life to protect. If Isaac kills me, he kills this baby too.
A tear drips into my coffee before I can wipe it away.
"Hey, little warrior," Mason's voice startles me, pulling me from my spiraling thoughts. His red hair is mussed from sleep as he sits down next to me. "Can't sleep?"
I sniffle, quickly wiping my cheeks. "Not when I'm running to the bathroom every five minutes. Or listening to them..." I trail off, gesturing vaguely upstairs.
He laughs softly. "Why do you think I moved back into the guest room after that second night?"
I can't help but laugh too. "I'm sorry," I say, my voice quieter now.
"For what?" He frowns, confused.
"We haven't..." I hesitate, glancing down. "It's been weeks. You must be frustrated."
Mason shakes his head, his green eyes warm. "Don't worry about me, Alyssa. Of course, I miss being with you sexually, but I don't need it like they obviously do. I can wait until you're ready."
His sincerity makes my heart ache.
"I think I'm broken," I admit, my voice cracking. "I went from needing sex to drown everything out to not wanting it at all. What's wrong with me?"
Mason takes a moment for responding. "You're not broken," he says gently. "You're healing. It's okay to feel different while you figure things out. We all understand. That's why those two up there are giving you space you asked for."
But how long will that last? The intrusive thought gnaws at the back of my mind. By the time my sex drive returns, I'll be so huge they won't even want me anymore anyway.
I swallow hard, blinking away the tears threatening to fall. I don't want to burden Mason with my insecurities, especially not when he's already being so kind and patient with me.
Mason seems to sense my turmoil, or maybe it's just that obvious on my face. He stands, gently tugging me toward the living room. He sits first, patting his lap. Slowly, I curl into his chest, letting his arms wrap around me.
"Can I read to you?" he asks, his voice hesitant, almost shy.
The question catches me off guard. "Read to me?"
I'm not really into horror like he is, but I don't mind.
Mason nods, a faint blush creeping up his neck. "I've been working up the courage to ask since we got back," he admits with a sheepish chuckle. "Now seemed like a good time, since it's just us."
He pulls a book from the nearby stack on the table, its cover catching the light from the lamp. I recognize it: a hard copy of my favorite dark romance.
"I didn't know you read smut," I tease, giggling.
"I don't," he admits. "But a while ago, back at the clubhouse, I saw you reading it on your phone...and I bought a hard copy. You haven't touched it since, so I thought we could finish it together."
My heart stutters. Oh.
He opens the book to the exact page I left off and begins reading, his voice smooth and deliberate, each word wrapping around me like a blanket. It's not long before the story dives into the next sex scene, and Mason doesn't flinch, narrating every steamy detail.
Damn. I never thought I'd like being read to, but this is so hot.
My body responds instinctively, a familiar ache building in my core. As I shift slightly in his lap, Mason's free hand grazes the waistband of my shorts, silently asking for permission. I notice how his voice softens when he senses my hesitation.
"You're in control, Alyssa," he whispers. "Tell me to stop, and I will."
I close my eyes, guiding his hand lower. The tension I've been carrying shifts, transforming into something else entirely as his fingers find my clit. He keeps reading as his hand moves in slow, torturous circles.
"Fuck, Mace," I breathe, but he shushes me, his lips brushing my ear.
"I'm reading, Alyssa," he murmurs, the teasing dominance in his tone sending a fresh wave of heat through me. "Be a good girl and pay attention."
It's impossible to focus on anything but him, the deep hum of his voice mingling with the electric sensations building in the pit of my stomach.
"Jesus," he mutters, pausing to glance at the page. "I can see why you like this book so much. Though I'd hope King isn't unhinged enough to fuck you with a loaded gun."
I laugh breathlessly. "Yeah, I don't think I'm into that."
As the scene ends, he closes the book, slipping a bookmark into place before setting it aside. His hands roam freely now, exploring with a hunger I haven't felt in weeks. My head falls against his shoulder, surrendering to the touch that seems to ignite parts of me I thought had gone numb.
"I want to know something," he says as he teases my nipples under my shirt. "Where do I fit into your fantasies, Alyssa? What scene could we act out together that could get you as flustered as you are now?"
Heat floods my cheeks, but the steady pace of his fingers leaves me too far gone to feel embarrassed. I hum softly, trying to focus. "You'd think it's stupid."
He pinches lightly, drawing a gasp from me. "Try me."
I close my eyes, letting the fantasy come to life in my mind. "You're a teacher, and I'm your student. College, obviously."
His breath hitches, and I can feel him harden beneath me. "Somewhat ethical. Go on."
I lick my lips, my words tumbling out in a rush. "You're grading my essay, and I bend over your desk in a skirt. You can't help but look, imagining what it'd be like-"
"Spank your ass until it's nice and red?" he finishes, voice strained, his hand quickening. "What happens next?"
"Then I drop my pencil," I continue, my voice trembling with arousal. "I bend over to pick it up, knowing you're watching. You lose control, tie my hands together with your belt, and spank me until I'm dripping down my legs, begging you to shove your pierced cock in me.
"Fuck," he hisses, grinding against me.
"You pin me down and fuck me on your desk. Hard and fast while I chant your name. Your piercing hits my g-spot over and over until I'm squirting all over you."
"And then I come deep in your pussy," he adds gruffly.
His fingers move faster, his lips brushing my ear as he murmurs praises that blur in the haze of pleasure. My body tightens and then releases, shuddering as I cry out his name. Mason groans softly, his hips stilling as he finds his own release in his sweatpants.
Mason keeps me close as we catch our breath, planting a soft kiss on my forehead. "Feel a little better now?"
I nod, warmth swelling in my chest. I needed this. Needed to feel something other than numb. Twisting in his lap, I kiss him hard. "I love you, Mace."
He gives me a warm smile. "I love you too, Alyssa."
Gently, he urges me off his lap, his cheeks still flushed. "I'm gonna change. Be right back, okay?"
I curl into the chair, exhaustion finally tugging at me as my eyelids grow heavy. For the first time in weeks, the dark cloud in my mind seems to lift, even if just a little. It's not gone, but with Mason's help, I feel like I can breathe again.